Life as is

Sugar and spice and everything nice

2011-12-10T21:20:00.001-06:00

I have a confession, although I do want a boy someday, I just love love love having little girls! :) I went to two baby showers today to celebrate two sweet baby girls that will be here in just a few months, and I am more excited now than ever to be having baby Ruby join us! :) I can't wait to start getting her things together and preparing for he arrival. My sweet girls are so special to me and I am just tickled pink to have another one! :)
As much as I love pregnancy, with this being the third one, I'm kinda over it and just ready to see my sweet Ruby girl. She is going to be such a delight and blessing for our little family! Just wanted to share my excitement about little REW ;)

I might add a belly picture tomorrow, if I remember :)

I wore blue ;)

2011-11-27T00:29:00.001-06:00

Today I wore a blue shirt, with blue jeans. I was told it would convince our ultrasound to show us a boy. But nope, we are having another girl :) We couldn't be more excited though. Her name is Ruby Elizabeth and I can't wait to meet her! She is going to be one amazing little girl. I picked out the fabric for her bedding tonight! :) its sooooo pretty! After the holidays I can't wait to start working on it! Thanks PINTEREST!! :)
We are interviewing midwives this week. So hopefully I'll start my prenatal care soon. Not that it makes a whole lot of difference, I feel good, I'm healthy, I don't have stds :-P I know what to expect so I don't really have any questions. All that's left are the legalities of it all. Following state protocol and all that jazz. :) either way I'm excited to start planning our homebirth and get everything in order! Now that we know its Ruby in there and not baby boy Hagan ( who I know is still up there hanging out and waiting to be born) I have this huge nesting feeling! I need to get something done for her! Even the one thing we've gotten no longer counts bc I have to get a cover for it!!
I'll add pictures later of our little angel. It was so cool to see her at this stage of pregnancy! :)

"Sounds Like Life to Me"

2011-11-06T17:09:00.001-06:00

Every once in a while I catch myself throwing a pity party in my head and I am always reminded of that song.
Anyway, I have decided its a fact, I am not a faithful blogger ;) (that little wink is for you Nikki) the more I try the less I blog. I have several drafts started but by the time I have them halfway done I get interrupted and by the time I get back to it, I'm either over the topic or think it sounded lame. So this one.. I WILL finish! Determination have set in. Even though one daughter is spinning in the middle of the room and the other is dragging her blanket and a suitcase arpund jibber jabbering.
Ok focusing ... Let me start with a little life update! Charlotte is 4 and is smarter than me. I'm pretty sure she'll be reading books by the end of the school year. The whole homeschooling thing took a different turn than what I was expecting. I am not as into it as I thought I would be and she is much more independent than I thought she would be. So our schooling basically consists of her picking out what activity she's going to work on am me giving her the instructions and *walking away*. The walking away is the key part, she will not even try if I am sitting there watching. I giver her directions she does her best and tells me when she either needs help or is finished. She is learning to put the sounds with letters and forming words, I am so impressed with her. She will randomly read small words when we are out and about. One time she read the word STOP off a stop sign while we were driving. My momma heart beamed with pride! :) She's also learning very basic addition an subtraction. Numbers under ten are her speciality ;) she does best when she can use her fingers and visualize it.
Her artwork is also getting to be impressive. She works really hard to stay in the lines when coloring. She prefers to draw on blank paper and her drawings are getting very creative. I am obviously overly impressed with my little smarty pants.
Little miss AnaB is also coming right along in her development. She is working very hard to for words. As a second child, I think we do more for her so she doesn't have to talk as much. I say this bc for the past few months my momma worrying has been kicking in with her. ;) Charlotte talked around 12 months and was always a talker, where as AnaB is a babbler. She runs things together Yo for the phrases we say to her. She is getting good at communicating and making her words more understandable. She is really something else haha, her little spirit is that of a true second child. :) Light hearted but sensitive and does everything for a laugh. She cracks herself up and us too.
Now onto our third little mayflower! 12 weeks along and I feel like he's just pushing my fat out haha. I doubt anyone else can tell I'm showing but I feel like a heffer. :-P I say he because we are hoping for a David Hagan this time ;) if not little Ruby Elizabeth will join us sometime around late May/ early June. :)
As for us, the parents, we are working on transitions of all kinds! Getting our current house ready to sell and looking for a new one, going from Army life to civis ;) E starts a new job with the Red Cross in Nashville in about a week!! Whew! On top of all that we are rockin the business scene! Heading for what we call a platinumship in March which means E will have the Freedom to quit his job and work our business full time if that's what we decide at that time. Very exciting!!
I'm also in search mode for a homebirth midwife for this pregnancy. It is stressful but exciting!! :) So that's about us in a nutshell!
I won't say that I'm going to be better at Blogging, I'm not even going to say I'll try. Blame PINTEREST ;) ....it just happened to be boring when I got on it earlier. Haha!

Yes.

2011-09-29T16:15:00.001-05:00

I really should blog more. I have several drafts that I started but never got to finish. I think the key to finding time is planning time. Or at least it sounds like the right idea. I have been trying to "plan" time for a while now and it doesn't seem to work out. Oh well.
Like I said, I really should blog more.

Fun Lunch Date

2011-08-11T16:52:00.001-05:00

Today I got a text from the Mr saying he had free time at lunch because a meeting was cancelled. :) That makes for one happy little wifey! He suggested a park with shade but I said you just be here around noon and I'll take care of the rest, the ideas were flowing like crazy! Here are some pictures from our fun little family lunch date!

Little girls and tea parties

2011-07-14T10:52:00.001-05:00

I'm realizing more and more everyday that my little babies are children and friends. Today Charlotte set up a tea party for us all. It was delicious tea and cakes :)

Burrito girl

2011-05-21T11:57:00.001-05:00

Her new favorite game hahaha

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Potty Training??? Already!??

2011-05-16T11:12:00.001-05:00

Yes ladies and gents, this little girl is a "potty animal"! ;)
I got out the little princess potty, not expecting anything to come of it but she knew exactly what to do! She got right up there after one having it out for a day and peed! Then last night we tried the bug.potty and as soon as I put her on it she started peeing! I am simply blown away because her big sister took over a year to use the potty regularly... And even then it took a lot of work and consistency. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't expect my 12.5 month old to be potty trained anytime soon, but she seems to really understand. Today Eric said she walked up to the little potty and tried to get on it and when he took off her diaper, she had just peed(it easy to tell that in a cloth diaper). Then later she walked up the the bug potty and he.took off her diaper and put her up there and she peed right away! I am one proud Momma! :) its almost like she is "training" herself!

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Dancing with the Easter bunny

2011-05-07T09:28:00.002-05:00

Almost kinda walking too :)

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Some days

2011-02-21T21:38:00.001-06:00

There are days that go by and my mind is on so many things that I can barely focus on anything. I run on auto pilot or survival mode. Until I get a free moment to myself where I don't have to worry about getting something done or be somewhere or think about what the kids are into, I am just a machine going through the motions of the day completely out of focus.
Then there are days that I wake up with a sense of clarity about life and where I'm headed and what's going on. My mind easily focuses the tasks at hand and is also aware of what is going on around me. It's refreshing and I feel like I can conquer the world on those days.
Then there are days where my mind focuses on one thing and one thing only. It consumes my every thought. I feel the thought deep through my soul. I think its best to leave it unspecified. But it is a powerful thought. I'll let your imaginations take over fom here.
Just know.... Today was a one-thought kind of day :)
***Love you hubby!***

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Today

2011-02-16T20:20:00.001-06:00

It is an absolutely beautiful day here in good ole Tennessee! It's almost 70 degrees and I couldn't resist opening the windows (well the 3 with screens on them at least)! The house has been so stuffy the last few weeks and this beautiful weather couldn't have come soon enough! Charlotte has been outside with the dog most of the morning. Poor AnaB has been snoozing; she has a stuffy nose and some teeth that are just rocking her little world in a not so fun fashion. I sure hope they pop through soon! Although there will be more to follow afterwards.:P
This warm weather is inspiring for me. Having the sun shine through the windows and being able to sit outside in its warmth just energizes me and rejuvenates my spirit! I even got started on a project I started last year! I have a wrought iron table and chairs on my deck, they are from my grand parents house and they have needed fixing up since we got them. So I have had the paint for a long time, just never the time to sit down and do it. So today whole C was napping I put baby in her pack n play and isolated my self down wind of her on the other side of the yard and painted the table and a little of one chair. Then I ran out of paint and the baby tan out of patience ;)
I still have to go get more paint and all the stuff to fix the seats of the chairs. I am excited to get it done and see how it turns out. Then maybe I'll finish the kitchen table ;) I'm sure my hubby will be glad haha.
Anyway, I'm so super glad the weather is warm again! Thanks ground hog Phil.;) you nailed it!

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This song says it all...

2011-02-13T21:38:00.000-06:00

A friend posted this on Facebook and it speaks more truth than any song I've ever heard before. No matter how independent the woman, she ALWAYS desires to be lead by a strong man. Someone who will fight for her and her dreams and someone that will make sure she knows she is loved and how much she is loved. Every child needs their daddy's strong presence in their life, it builds confidence and solidifies who they are as individuals. I can only give my girls so much, their Daddy is the one who takes their hands from me as I nurture them and guides them along in their independence.

My Valentine

2011-02-13T09:56:00.001-06:00

I remember the first time I met Eric. We were briefly introduced at a church function because we were going to be leading a youth group at a deciple now retreat in a few weeks. After the church thing every one went to my friend Jenna's dorm room. At the time I thought he was dating one of Jenna's friends so I pretended not to notice him too much. That was probably one of the hardest things I've ever done. It was impossible not to notice him and I could just feel him drawing me in. It was around this time of year and everyone was talking about their Valentine plans... Or "Singles Awareness Day" as we so immaturely put it. Haha The girl I thought he was dating was sitting next to him all googley-eyed and ever so obvious about her attraction/ infatuation with him, while I sat with Jenna in a chair across the room. I was playing it cool and not paying attention to what the "kids" were doing. (I Was in what would have been my second year of college and these kids were staring their second semester, so I was so clearly more mature than they were.. Blah blah blah, high and mighty :P yep that was me!) Anyways, I would catch his eye for a split second every now and then. I don't remember many more details of that particular night, except that I told the girl way to go for snagging such a catch! And I remember the feeling of electricity in the room whenever I thought about him and the way he looked at me. When we actually met a few weeks after that first encounter, I was SO nervous. I remember packing for the weekend wondering what was appropriate to wear with pre-teen/teenagers that would still be cute enough to get me noticed ;) I remember exactly what I wore to work that day, mostly because Eric talks about this particular pair of brown pants as if they were made to fit my form perfectly and just for his eyes haha. He says that's the first thing he noticed about me.. My booty (not the cat.. He met her the next weekend) ;)
It's so funny how much physical attraction plays a part in relationships. There has to be something chemical to it as well. I remember being connected on some level that was out of my control. Or maybe that just how my mind analyses the feelings from my perspective now.:)
All I know is that everything I have ever wanted for my life has come from that first encounter 6 years ago, when I tried to ignore the cute guy on the couch that I thought was dating someone else. And I'm so glad he wasn't.

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Procrastination

2011-02-08T15:14:00.001-06:00

This usually how it goes every time I have a good blog rolling around in my head. Kids go to sleep. Sit down at computer. Open my blog page. See the days other posts on my side bar. Open a new tab with Facebook. Start thumbing through fb status'. Go back to my blog page. Open most interesting post from other fav Blogger. Read latest post an any others I haven't read yet. Do the same for the rest of my other favorite Bloggers. Flip back to fb in between blogs to catch up on new status'. Go back to whatever blog I was reading. Click on a sponsor and shop their page. Go back to my blog. Open publisher to write the blog I sat down to write. Forget why it was so important bc there are so many.more fun things to blog about. Decide to write it anyway. Kids wake up. Or I get tired and fall asleep.

That is why my blogs are few and at between right now :)
Sorry

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Business name

2011-01-30T20:16:00.001-06:00

It's no secret that I have become a birth fanatic (i like to say birth junkie). :) One of my goals for 2011 is to become a certified Hypnobirthing practitioner, simply meaning certified to teach the practice of Marie Mongan's hypnobirthing method. I'm hoping to attend the course in late March/early April. This would put me starting my own classes in the May-June time frame. I have been trying to come up with a name for my services. This is to include, but is not limited to, hypnobirthing, an introduction to breastfeeding, a library of birth books for borrowing, birth videos for rent, eventually doula services, placenta encapsulation, and possibly a class on homemade babyfood. I plan on starting with a Facebook page to provide a site for networking with other like businesses and a place for moms to ask questions and have them answered either by other birth proffessionals or other mommas who have experience with the topic. E came up with Pure Birth and I like it but I found another business with the same name, so that one is out. And I think with such a variety of services I'd like to try to be general. So I've been Googling different words and their synonyms, but I'm at a loss. Any ideas, suggestions or advice is welcome! :)
Ps. Would you hire me?

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My Dirty Little Secret...

2011-01-28T17:32:00.002-06:00

We all have one... Right?? *please say yes* Anyway, I try to be as transparent as possible all the time but I realized that there is a part of me that no one sees but my husband and kids. I'm not proud of it, and I sure hope to change it in the near future. (hopefully This blog will be my inspiration/accountability) It will certainly take a lot of time and probably more expertise than I have but nonetheless, I must take control of my situation to change it. Here it is... My closet... Please don't judge...

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So anyone with organizing skills is welcome here!! I need to get rid of a lot and rebuild the structure of the whole thing. The shelves are falling off the wall :P

Once again... Don't judge me.

Bolg Apology

2011-01-26T09:40:00.001-06:00

To all of my faithful blog readers.. If there are any. I apologise for my major slacker-ness. No excuses. Well maybe a couple..;)
Anyway, I am starting this new thing called "using a schedule". I am basically making time to get things done and still make time for fun/personal/momma time. It's still a work in progress and since I have a growing baby with her own ever-changing routine I'm sure I am far from perfecting my schedule.:) Anyway for now, I'll have to squeeze in a tid bit of a blog here and there. Stay tuned for an update blog with the Wehmeyer 2011 plans and what's gone on so far this year.

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Oh Crap

2011-01-03T09:36:00.000-06:00

I'm pretty sure its been forever since I posted a blog... Sorry. And it might be another forever before I get to... Baby A just woke up. This is my life, one is sleeping the other is up and then they switch. Its quite exhausting.

My Baby Boy..

2010-11-08T11:12:00.000-06:00

Let me start with NO I AM NOT PREGNANT... yet. :)
I have been thinking about him a lot though. It's like I know him, I can picture him. I get these aches when I think about him, like I miss him because he's not here. My belly aches to hold him and "create" his body and his little features. I think about playing with him and snuggling with him and getting dirty and making messes. :) I can't wait to see Charlotte interact with a brother, and see Anabelle giggle with him! :) The thought of 3 children comes so much easier than the thought of 2 did and I really feel as if a part of our family is missing because this little boy isn't here! Yes, I know that the next time we get pregnant we could very well have another girl.. And OF COURSE I would welcome her as well! :) She is very much wanted here too! :) And Yes, I am aware of the fact that the next 3 pregnancies could all be girls! And I'm ok with that too, but as long as that little baby boy shows up sometime. I don't think I could stop having babies until he joined us, haha! We have his name picked and I found the colors for his room. I.am.ready.
My baby is now just over 6 months! I'll be putting a lot of her things away soon, like the boppy pillow, her bumbo seat (she flips out of it), her bouncy seat, and probably her swing in a few months! I'm definitely enjoying her growing up but its sad too! She was so snuggly! :) I LOVE seeing her change and get more interactive and her smiles and giggles get bigger and come easier every day, but I miss my sweet fuzzy headed little bundle :) The tiny burrito baby! :) We are still in "debate" as to when we'll try for another (not that we're preventing now). But I sure hope its soon! :) I know of several babies due in the next month or 2 and I'm super excited for babies to snuggle! So that will have to do for now... But since I know my hubby will read this.. I'll just put it out there one more time... I'm ready when you are! ;)

OKTOBER

2010-11-01T11:30:00.000-05:00

Wow.. its really November already! Crazy! I think this is the first time I've ever said this but I'm SO glad October is gone! It was the busiest month EVER!! A little Recap:
First weekend= Little trip to Chelsey's Lake house and a Zoo day then of course the week is spent recovering from one night away :oP and getting ready for the next weekend's events
Second weekend= Peay Hollow Family Reunion in Goodlettsville :) My FAVORITE time of year! I seriously look forward to this all year! I would have to say "The Farm" as we call it, is one of my ALL TIME favorite places on earth. :) Really, its just a cluster of a few houses in the valley of a huge wooded hill. It's my Dad's side of the family and we always have a blast! They do a Huge bonfire on Friday night with Hot dogs & Smores. Back in the hay days my uncle used to bring chicken and dove and quail he'd hunted and they'd cook up all kinds of good stuff (not that I was old enough to appreciate it then) and everybody would bring tents and campers and we'd camp out Friday night around the fire. On Saturday everyone comes back for lunch and all day ballgames and fun! This year they had the brilliant idea to rent a bouncy house for all the kiddos.. and a few of the "Big kids" like my brother... :) Someone always takes the "gator" up on the hill with a few kids in toe, and usually their parents have no idea and look for them frantically until they get back down haha. Anyway, it was super fun.
Saturday night we celebrated our good friends Cassie and Mike for their wedding the upcoming weekend! :) By the end of that day my girls were POOPED! Whew! So was I!! And again the week was spent recovering and preparing for our next trip..
Third weekend= Well.. you read about that previously...
Fourth weekend= Well The Thursday before was Charlotte's trip to the Pumpkin Patch with her school. AnaB went with them. It was super fun and I had been texting with E all day on Google Talk. He kept making leading comments hinting that he was coming home early, but I have learned to not trust anything like that until it actually happens so I blew it off and just figured he was being a guy. I got the girls home and got C down for her nap then was rocking the baby trying to get her to sleep when the doorbell rang...
Yep, Big Daddy E was home! He had a big bouquet of Balloons with Reece's taped to it haha. He said he couldn't find flowers so that's what he got. haha! He knows me well enough to know that the Reece's are better than anything else haha. I was totally surprised! It has been wonderful and busy having him home! We went to Chattanooga that weekend for my cousin's Wedding and then last week we were just busy busy busy! And of course this last weekend was Halloween! We had two parties on Saturday and did some pictures on Sunday along with Trick or Treating! We had lots of fun, except poor baby A has a super snotty nose and hasn't been feeling her best. :(
I can't wait to see the pictures Ashley took! I think she got the only Family picture of us in our Halloween costumes too! haha Eric and I went last minute and picked out a matching couples costume... Prison Guard and inmate... haha I was the inmate.. it was a little more risque' than I like but I doctored it up with a tank underneath and some leggings :) I refuse to be the "skanky mom" haha I'm under no illusion that I can pull of those sexy costumes.. But it was fun :)
And Now it is November and We're gearing up for more busy busy busy! :oP Hope everyone had a good October!
Here's to November, Turkeys, pies, holidays, family time, and Christmas music!! :)

Blogger app... YES!

2010-10-27T11:10:00.001-05:00

I am currently blogging from my Droid Eris... it is awesome! :) on th flip side though, now I have no excuses to not blog everything! So be looking for up coming mobile blogs :) they might be short but I can assure you I will do my best to make them worth the read!
Happy blogging ya'll!

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The baby sleeps...

2010-10-18T13:45:00.001-05:00

OK well I haven't blogged this entire month.. I was really hoping to be on a roll from the September challenge but we have been so busy that the time I'm home I feel like I'm playing catch up on everything else! I also have not done a family/baby/life update in a while! So I think I'll tackle that one today while the baby is sleeping.
First off we are about a week and a half from having a 6 month old!! :) I'm thinking I'm going to throw her a Half birthday party. Something small with just a few friends and other babies :) Serving things in halves.. like Half a pizza or half sandwiches.. maybe deviled eggs, and of course Half a cake! :) Fun fun! These Days Miss AnaB is rolling back and forth all over and scooting around on the floor, putting everything into her mouth and really trying hard to crawl. She'll get up on her hand and knees and then push up onto her toes like she's doing yoga! (downward dog anyone?) haha I guess she's been watching me.. the few (maybe 3) times I've gotten around to doing it! Anyway, I think she's close, probably waiting for Daddy to come home to show off for him! *story of my life* She's working on getting a tooth also.. whew! She is not a good little teether! She is super fussy and up a lot at night. I really thought her Amber teething necklace would help a lot more, I think I might try ordering a different kind from Etsy.. they are much cuter there, too. :) (we all know that fashion on little girls is what really matters!) She has had a rough couple of weeks, teeth coming in and she had a little infection on her hip. I'm not exactly sure what its from but she got two very large infected bumps, one right inside her diaper and the other right outside of it. I freaked when it got big and of course researched it online thinking "OH MY GOD ITS MRSA!!! SHE'S GOING TO DIE!" Luckily I have a doctor that is pretty laid back and said, well just keep doing what you're doing and give her some Antibiotics to help her little body fight the infection. So she's being taking the sticky pink stuff for the last week and I've been doing warm compresses every night on the bumps. Both of them started way under the skin them worked their way to the surface forming a puss pocket and eventually popping. Once they popped they got much better but I know it hurt her, I had to work all the nasty stuff out of there and she cried and cried. I didn't even push hard, just light pressure made the stuff come pouring out and she wailed :( It was pitiful and I cried along with her. The antibiotic gives her tummy aches and lots of poopy diapers.. that along with teeth coming in makes for a very unhappy baby. Hopefully we'll finish up the yucky pink stuff in a few days and be done with it, I'd stop it now but Dr. Dad says she needs to finish it out or the bacteria could come back and be resistant to the antibiotic.
Charlotte is very much a 3 year old.. I'm not sure who came up with the terrible two's because the three's are MUCH worse! She has realized that she has an opinion and that sometimes it doesn't matter because Mom trumps her opinion, so she fights that all the time. I know Eric will have a much better way of dealing with it when he gets home. We make such a great team as parents and when he's gone I know I make a lot of mistakes. But it's all a learning experience right?.. Anyway, Charlotte LOOOVES her school. I'm not sure if she has any friends because when I ask who she plays with she always says, "I don't know" typical kid answer. She's such a little person now. She learns things on her own and is just a big sponge, soaking up everything from everywhere... I'm pretty sure this morning she told me she was "pissed".. yes she used that word. I was too tired to acknowledge it though, also I know if I tell her not to say it or make a big deal about it, she'll say it all the time.. because she does exactly what I tell her not to do. She likes to push every limit set and test me in every area of life... a very sarcastic *yay* here... I remember the days when I was the only thing teaching her and she only learned what I taught her... those were the days... Oh well I guess my job as a parent is to let her experience things and then teach her how to decipher the good and bad influences. We are all learning here. This week her school is going to the pumpkin patch, I'm thinking I'm going to go along. We'll go ahead and get some pumpkins so when Daddy gets home (hopefully this weekend) we can carve away! :)
This last weekend we went down to Navarre Beach, Fl, for my friend Cassie's wedding. Charlotte was her flower girl. I learned a valuable lesson over the 4 days we were there: Never attempt vacations without Eric or my mom. I'm pretty sure the way my girls acted the whole weekend and the way I reacted scared a lot of people into NOT having kids :P But I must stress.. parenting is not hard (well it is.. just not as crazy as I looked) but it is meant to be a shared job and children are jipped when there is just one parent. If we were going to stay in the military, I would probably not have any more kids until we were out. Thankfully we only have about a year left! So hopefully next year we'll have baby boy Wehmeyer on the way (fingers crossed) :)

***A Note for Cassie and Mike, I'm so sorry for being so stressed (and probably over dramatic) the weekend of your special day. I let Charlotte get away with too much because I was trying to be a nice mom on vacation, but she took advantage of that (as any child would) and when I was taking her to time out at the reception she stepped on my dress... it was strapless..(you see where this is going??) Yes, I'm pretty sure I flashed half the restaurant.. including Mike's parents as I was right in front of their table when the front of my dress came about half way down my chest... That is why we ducked out. I was at the end of my rope with the kiddos and had just given your wedding guests a show.. My face stayed red until the girls were sleeping and I downed a couple of glasses of wine. So once again... I apologize ever so humbly and I hope you don't think ill of me for my lack of sanity over the weekend.Your wedding was so beautiful and I am blessed to have gotten to be a part of it. I am honored that you love my little girl so much to want her to share in your ceremony and "lay the magic path" for you to walk down. ;) Love you guys!****
Now back to my update... As I mentioned previously, E will be home shortly and I am sooooo looking forward to this. We have a lot going on for the next ~~few months~~ ...year!! Starting when E gets home, Halloween, throwing a baby shower, I'm sitting in on childbirth classes for the next 4 weeks, E gets 2 weeks leave for Turkey day so we're taking a little vacay (hopefully), then Christmas break is about 2 weeks after that, then we'll be spending the first two weeks of January in NC for some training and visiting with friends (hoping to be there for a birth!! excited!!!) then a couple weeks after that E leaves AGAIN for 6 weeks of training over seas.. LAME! then hopefully we can lay low until he gets out of the dag-blasted army(thanks billy ray cyrus for the adjective)! And somewhere in there I'd like to fit in getting certified to teach Hypnobirthing and start the Doula certification courses. (just a note for any preggos out there, a certificate does not make a Doula.. I would gladly be a support person for you and your husband/significant other) ;)

The girls!

This is what Charlotte really wanted to do all weekend.. play with Dawson!

The flower girl PRO!

Seriously.. she's got it down!

Me & baby ready for the wedding

Pretty much sums up the whole weekend right there!

What I see

2010-10-01T12:18:00.000-05:00

Last day.. My reflection in the mirror... Hmm Well its interesting, I see a lot of different things when I look at myself. When I look at my physical features i think to myself: Hmm I'm not sure if i prefer my curly perm do, or the all natural straight look that was mine for 25 years. I see my facial flaws (or what I consider flaws) and think, hmm I should pop that.. or man I wish the dark circles would go away (I've had them since I was a kid). I see the body of a mother and think.. Well.. it could be worse I guess. I'm proud of what it took to get it that way, but its surreal and slightly disappointing to not be the tight perky little thing I was 4 or so years ago. I'm excited to get done having babies (in like 5 or so years haha) so I can get back into shape and STAY that way :) But I'm WAY more excited to have all the babies I'm given. :oD
When I look into the mirror and "reflect" on my non-physical features.. I think about myself as a wife, and how I long to feel complete again with my husband at my side. I think about myself as a mother and how much I can't wait for more growth in our family. Not just the literal sense of adding more kiddo's but also growth together, I look forward to getting to know each of my children as their personalities develop and change through out the years. I look forward to getting to know my husband as we grow and change and develop our relationship more and much deeper. There is a lot of life left to live and all the experiences and relationships will change what I see when I look in the mirror. I can't wait to know what I will see in my reflection in 30+ years, Who will I be then, what will I look like? (hopefully still young looking thanks to Artistry) ;) hehe

Well, that's the end of the September Blog challenge... it was fun while it lasted but I'm a little burnt out.. I might have to wait on my "October challenge". We'll see how the day pans out. :)
Happy Fall everyone!! October is beautiful so far!!

Getting all Caught up!

2010-09-30T00:33:00.000-05:00

Ok ok I'm getting caught up.. here's a quickie of the last week's challenge that I slacked on...
Day 21, Someone you judged by a first impression.. Well I tend to judge a lot of people based on first impressions... a lot of times I'm right but there have been quite a few times I've been WAY off, and have ended up thinking the complete opposite of the person after spending some time with them. One person in Particular is a friend I met while living in NC. Miss Bekah. At first I wasn't sure how to take in her personality. It seemed fake and I couldn't believe anyone would be that sweet. BOY was I wrong.. she is one of the most caring, giving sweetest people I've ever met! I'm so glad we've stayed in touch and I'm even more glad that I get to see her in just a few months along with (hopefully) her baby girl! EEEEEEEEE!!!!! YAY!

Day 22: Some one I want to give a second chance to?? Ummm well, I don't have anyone blacklisted... I tend to give second chances pretty easily. I'd have to say if I had to chose someone to give a second chance to it would be the military.. although there's NO WAY I would ever do this again by choice. We are done with the military life style in one year, one month, and ten days.. and I couldn't be happier to say adios!

Day 23: Last person I kissed: Mmmmmm I got some yummy Charlotte kisses at bedtime tonight! She was so lovey and sweet! I just can't get enough of those sometimes!! I'm pretty sure AnaB is trying to give kisses too. She loves to open her mouth and plop that slobbery face right on my cheek! :) I love those too!! I think somebody upstairs was looking out for me when he gave me these two girls! They pretty much complete me! Even when I feel totally overwhelmed and completely inadequate as a parent or at life in general, I get the biggest hug from C and she tells me "You're the BEST Momma!" Or I get to look at baby A and her full belly after gobbling up some momma milk and I know I'm doing just what I need to be doing for them.

Day 24: The person who gave you your favorite memory... Well DUH.. This one belongs to my husband! :) The memory would be our life, our family, our kiddos! All of it! It may sound weird but I really don't remember much of life before them! Its a weird feeling to have to be reminded of certain things that used to be such fond memories. I just have so much life and love built into out lives the last five years, it kind of pushes out the other stuff. :) Thanks E for giving me such a wonderful life full of love and laughter! :)

Day 25: The person that you know who is going through the worst of times.. ummm well I'm not quite sure.. I know poor Charlotte had a rough day today. One thing after another! Starting with the kitty! Her poor face is so scratched up. She plays SOO rough with the cat and no matter how many times I tell her to be easy or leave her alone bc she's done playing and is going to get mean.. she still keeps pushing Brie's buttons and gets scratched on a daily basis. This week has been the worst though.. and its getting too close to her little eyes. She already has some scars that I'm not sure will go away so, I made the tough decision to get the kitty declawed. :( I hate to do that bc its just not right to do that in my opinion.. but the other option for us is to get rid of the cat. I know C would be devastated to lose her Brie Brie so I'm calling the vet tomorrow to see what can be done asap.

Day 26: The last person I made a pinky promise to: Hmmm Probably Eric. We used to do that a lot when we first got married. I coulnt' tell you what it was, though.

Day 27: The Friendliest person I met for one day... This one is quit frustrating for me. You see I met this girl last year on an airplane ride back from visiting E's family in KC and we totally clicked right away! She had a little boy, I had C and as we got to talking, we found out our hubby's had the same type of job and probably knew each other. Well as the flight came to an end, I offered my # on my business card and expressed how much I enjoyed getting to know her and if she ever wanted to get together to give me a call. NADA! I never heard from her. However, I saw her a few months later at a festival in town and then found out that she and her hubbs are in the same batt. as my good friends and I have seen her at their house a couple of times... she does NOT remember me... UGH! it kind of makes me want to kick and scream like a kid throwing a tantrum.. I've never been blown off like that. But in all honesty, I have read a few of her blog posts, and have heard through the grape vine a few thi9ngs about her personality and I'm not sure we'd be good friends. So I guess it works out for the best... I just think its funny that we've talked face to face several times and she doesn't remember me at all.

Day 28: Someone that changed my life: I grew up on Fairway drive in Donelson, Tn. When I was just a baby our neighbors had a little girl that was around 7 years older than me (I'm not for certain Donelson, Tn. When I was just a baby our neighbors had a little girl that was around 7 years older than me (I'm not for certain that's accurate) Anyway, she played with my brother and was a total tomboy.. but I idolized her and loved her like a sister! She moved away but our parents kept in touch and when she got old enough she became our babysitter. I attribute most of my personality traits to Christy... She was someone I wanted to be just like and would have done anything she said was cool. I tried to talk like her, fix my hair like her, dress like her, and anything else just to be like her! She could get me to take medicine or do my chores, anything really! :) She was my Matron of Honor in my wedding and I still value everything she says. I have SO many great memories with her! I consider her a sister and I'm so glad we can get our girlie's together and they seem to have just as much fun as we did!

Day 29: The person I want to tell everything to but are too afraid.. haha EVERYONE! I am constantly thinking anytime I meet someone, oh.. I think I should have talked to them more about this. I saw a girl in Panera the other day and she looked familiar and I wanted to talk to her.. even more so after i over heard her say she was 3 wks preggo!!!!! :D I went to the bathroom and she came in talking about her dr appointment. I almost interjected myself into her conversation, but figured since she was in the stall.. it would have been a little weird... I was bouncing off the walls in my head though! I just wanted to blabber her head off! haha Anyone that will listen.. I will tell all.. probably too much! ;) I'm an open book most of the time.

YAY! All caught up! Tomorrow is the last day of September!! Only a few more weeks until hubby gets home! HOOPY DOO! (that's what my Grandaddy always said) :) Maybe I can get in a personal catch up post tomorrow while C is at school! :D
For now.. good night!

Booty Booty Booty Rockin' Everywhere!

2010-09-23T17:08:00.000-05:00

Day 20 is about the one who broke my heart the hardest. I would write about one of the many, many.. many boys I dated and convinced myself I was going to marry only to have them break up with me the next day.. or in 30 min. in some cases haha. (oh jr high.. you were such a funny time).. Anyway, I'm not going to write about a romantic heartbreak, because I think with every heart-breaking break-up there is a renewing of mind and spirit and something good ALWAYS comes out of it. I would not be the same girl I am without all those boys who "broke my heart", AND I wouldn't be able to appreciate the man my hubby is without meeting all those silly boys! So my biggest heartache came from.... (if you know me even in the slightest, by the title you should know whats coming..) Booty. My cat. :) Yes my sweet Booty.

When I was in 2nd grade we moved to Mj, and brought our kitty Sugar with us, she was the prettiest cat EVER! But she was too fond of her new outdoor accommodations and spent a lot of time roaming. One day, about a year or so after moving there, our neighbors informed us that they had found her on the road outside out house. poor Sugar was hit by a car. Never fear because I pestered my parents for quite sometime after that for another kitty. :) So close to the end of my 3rd grade school year my mom found someone whose cat had just had kittens and they gave us several pictures of the litter. My parents were ever so generous and allowed both my brother and I to pick out one kitten each. I picked one that looked similar to Sugar in her markings and my brother picked out a cute, little grey fluff ball. Shortly after the school year ended my mom took me to the little farm where they lived. We picked up the kittens and that night my friend Lindsy (yes the very same Lbow from a previous post) came over to see them and help me name them. At first they were Sassy (my kitty) and Boots, for her one lightly colored foot, (Jim's kitty). But as Lindsay and I played with them and dressed them up that night we noticed that they both shook their little fluffy rears when they walked.. so Boots turned into Booty! :) they were indoor kitties for a while and played with each other all the time! They were SO funny the way they'd chase all over the house! After about a year of having Sassy and Booty my parents moved them outside, Now looking back I'm sure it was because of the hair content that probably covered EVERYTHING! They lived outside for the next few years, they had a little house that we put pillows and heating pads in for the winters and they would roam and catch all kinds of critters. Happy kitties for sure!

When I got into High school I had a boyfriend and so did all my friends so, I just HAD to throw a New years eve party so we could all have the Hollywood romance of a kiss when midnight hit! ;) HA! After the party we were all standing outside waiting for the boy's parents to come get them and Lindsy and I heard a teeny tiny little meow coming from somewhere. It was this tiny baby orange tabby cat with the biggest ears I've ever seen! haha So.. I took him in too, his name was Oliver. (you might be wondering how this relates to Booty, but I'm getting there, just hang on) Oliver staying on the front porch for a few days, to give him freedom to go back home if he had one, but he stayed close and gobbled up everything I fed him. So then he moved inside since it was soooo cold out and he was so tiny (with huge ears). The next summer, though, he moved outside on the back porch with the other two kitties. They were not too fond of him. Sassy tolerated him but Booty went MIA for a little while.. about 2 weeks! I thought she was gone for good, but to be honest, I didn't really care bc up to then she was Jim's cat and I was pretty impartial to her. When she finally came back home, I found her on the other side of our fenced in pool area, she was a mess! :( her tail was dragging and so were her back feet, she was pitiful, so we took her to the vet (Thanks dad, I'm sure it was mucho expensive!!), They X-ray'd her and found a little BB from a BB gun.. yes someone SHOT her!! So, this BB was lodged in her spinal cord paralyzing her tail and her two legs. The vet decided it was best to amputate her tail, but that her legs her still ok and would just need some time to heal and get the feeling back. They left the BB in there for fear of removing it and then having her whole hind end paralyzed. So when Booty was recovered from surgery and back at home, it was the unanimous decision (or maybe my insisting) that she stayed inside. She was terrified to be outside and would only stay out for short periods of time. She became my buddy! She slept in my room usually snuggled up with me, and pretty much only trusted me. Poor thing still had trouble with her feet and would bite at them bc she couldn't feel her toes. It was comical but pitiful too. She stayed inside with me until I left for college.. I was soooo sad to leave her!! But she was in the good hands of my momma! I visited as much as I could :) Then when I moved back home from school we were reunited! :) It was glorious to get to snuggle with her again! :) She was such a great cat! :) After moving back home, I met E and we got married then merged our kitties into our new apartment in Nc.. Booty and Jake were our babies for a while... they HATED each other! We had to shut Jake out of our room at night just so we could sleep without hearing them fighting, but her would literally sit right outside the door howling! :oP Then we adopted Friday :) So we had Booty Jake and Friday all under one roof of a tiny apartment. Booty made it back to Tn, and by the time she was in her home state again she was turning 15! Whew! She had been around the block a few times! ;) We got settled in and got a dog, Social, and then a few months later some friends moved in with us and since he was allergic to cats we moved the Jake and Friday out but of course miss Booty stayed inside, she was queen of her castle after all. But I think the stress, of her boys moving outside, having 4 more people in the house (lots of babies) and just being old took a toll on her after a while. The beginning of September of 2008 we were celebrating Charlotte's 1st birthday and on a Saturday had a big party at our house. the next day, we were planning on celebrating with friends (only one of her friends showed up though). Sunday morning we got up and went to church and the other family got home before us. When we got home we started to get ready for the party and I went to our hutch cabinets to get a table cloth or a platter out and Booty was curled up on the floor in front of the cabinet, so I bent down gave her a pat and noticed right away that something was wrong, she was stiff and not responding... I got a good look at her face and she was definitely gone, eyes glazed over and tongue out... I screamed, E came running and held on to me while I cried. I am still skeptic as to what happened to her, most likely old age but I wonder if she got into something or if she hadn't had enough water or if one of the dogs had literally scared her to death or what... Anyway, we put her little body all curled up like she was sleeping, in her pink Booty bed and then put her into a box and buried her under our arbor in the back yard. I had always wanted to have her stuffed.. seriously... I am still sad that we didn't do it. I would be really nice to look over and see her curled up in her little bed. I miss her lots and lots. She was with me for 15 years.. that's longer than E at this point! I know a lot of my friends who have met her have Booty stories of their own.. whether she peed on their stuff (sorry) or they loved her like i did.
And that has been my hardest heart break to date. I keep her picture by my bed and in lots of other places. :) My sweet Booty.

<3!!

Pesky Pesterers

2010-09-18T23:57:00.000-05:00

Day 19 is about someone that pesters my mind.. good or bad.. I don't have any one person in particular, but I can guarantee, there are at least 20 or so Moms-to-be or new moms that are Always on my mind! Pregnancy, birth, and babies are such a passion of mine that anytime someone tells me they're pregnant I get just as excited as if it were me! :) I wish I had the resources and the capabilities to host a big party for all the pregnant women and new moms! I just love to celebrate everything about it! It's such a bonding trait for women! I truly believe our ability to give life and sustain it, is the MOST amazing thing ever created... I don't know why anyone would ever call childbirth a ~~curse~~.. except maybe a man who was envious of our talents! ;) When you break down everything that happens in order to get pregnant, how the cervix opens and moves down during ovulation and secretes a thick mucous to hold onto sperm so that it doesn't leave the body. Then everything the body goes through and is able to do during pregnancy to keep this little life safe, and even more so the change in the body as it readies itself for the birthing process! Ugh! WOW! The way the uterus is designed so that as it first starts contracting (aka braxton hicks) it is readying the cervix to start dilating, and as the contractions become a bit stronger closer to labor, the way the different layers of the uterus work to open the cervix and work the baby down on their own.. The female body is truly something to be celebrated. My favorite thing though.. is how the body works as soon as the baby is born. I don't care who you are, your body will make breastmilk and make exactly enough for what your baby needs! A Dr. may try to tell you its not enough for your baby, but trust me.. it is! They will get every little bit they need just from you!
Ok so that's my soapbox...
Back on track.. pregnant women, are always on my mind :) The streaming list of women I know is constantly running in my head and how their sweet little babies are doing! I know the joy that comes through it all and the potential experience they can have and I want it for them all so badly! Sometimes I know I overstep my boundaries in giving unwanted advice, its just that I truly believe with all my heart that no matter what kind of difficulties your "labor" brings it is possible to do it in the most natural way and if left alone to do what it's meant to do, the body and the baby will work together and result in a more positive experience.
Oh my, I've gone off and ranted.. :P

The person I want to be..

2010-09-18T23:33:00.000-05:00

Hmm.. The kind of person I want to be, one who accepts others for who they are, where they've come from, and where they're going. I want to be a person who wears her heart on her sleeves so people always know that I love them, (I'm not always the best at showing it). I'd like to be someone, who is always open to new ideas but still rooted in what I know to be truth. I'm always working to be the kind of person that can give advice and not care if its taken or disregarded (that's tough for me). I want to always have an open home and an open heart to people in need, whether its an ear they need or a million dollars, I want to give it to them. I want to be the kind of mom that gives her kids reassurance and confidence so they grow to make good life decisions. I want to make the mistakes so others (and my kids) don't have to. I want to be the one to bear the brunt of some things because I know its the right thing to shield weaker individuals. I want to be the kind of wife that listens first to her husband and then responds to the needs of our family. I want to be the kind of friend that when time or distance separates a relationship no matter what, is always there for you. I want to be the kind of person people will one day say, "Yeah, that Beth girl, She was really something!"
Those are just a few things I strive for in my life. My life is a work in progress and I know I'll never be perfect but I also know I'll never stop trying to be better than the day before.

Fill in the blank friday

2010-09-18T01:35:00.001-05:00

1. When I get a day to myself I like to: Shop, spend it with a girlfriend, or do something crafty!
2. High School was: negative.. I have a lot of great memories with amazing people... but its hard not to focus on the feeling of being hated most of the time, at a point in life where all you want is acceptance from people, and the *in* crowd, I was never accepted fully and that's the feeling that stuck with me.

3. A little dream I have is: to have a craft room all my own, the freedom to create what I want, when I want, how I want and in my own timing.
4. A big dream I have is: to have that craft room attached to a big ole house! With room for lots and LOTS of kiddos!
5. If I could drive any car it would be: hmmm I'm up in the air about cars right now... I'm so torn between practicality and style :oP life as a mom I guess...
6. A time when I felt really and truly beautiful was: Just following the birth of baby Anabelle. It was a life-defining experience and one that made me embrace my femininity and all that encompasses it.

7. Tomorrow I will: be getting up early to check out the farmer's market in town and then going for a walk! :)

From my past...

2010-09-18T00:48:00.000-05:00

Challenge # seventeen is about someone from my past.. Well I have 2 someones! Sisters actually! :) They were my first friends ever! Abby and Maggie Miller lived next door to me when I was little. We lived on Fairway Drive and the distance between my back door and theirs was a well travelled path. I love hearing the stories from our parents when they talk about us as kiddos. :) The nick names between our families are some of my faves too! Their momma calls me Bethie B and every time I hear it, I just feel back at home. I definitely don't see them as often as I'd like to but I sure do miss them! Abby, Maggie and their Mom, Lori, are three women that I really do cherish and can't wait to be close to again! :) Abby is about 2 years younger than me and Maggie is 4 years younger. Despite the age difference we used to have soooooooo much fun playing together! We fought like sisters had lots of silly moments and made up ALL kinds of games and stories. I'd say these girls are the closest things to sisters I have ever had and I'm so glad to be a part of their family as well. :) A hug from one of these girls is just what I need!

All three of my favorite women!

Their family.. Maggie, Abby, (their step-sis, Carlie), Lori, and her hub Charlie

Abby, me and a brand new baby Anabelle :) (2 or 3 weeks fresh)

eLBOW

2010-09-16T21:48:00.000-05:00

Day sixteen of the blog challenge is someone who lives out of state. Well I know LOTS of people outside of Tennessee (although I don't know why any one would live anywhere else!). But I have to say the one who most recently left the state left for a very good reason :) LOVE! My best childhood friend, the soon-to-be Lindsy Lawrence ;).. (for now, though, I'm still gonna call her LBow) She moved to Mi, to be with her boyfriend, now fiance'. I'm so happy that she's found such a great guy BUT I definitely think they need to move here! I mean.. they can't very well have babies so far away!!!
Lindsy and I met when we moved to MJ a week apart from each other. When I first met her, I hated her (we were 8) and she stole my thunder of being the new girl! haha But it sure didn't take long for us to become inseparable, pretty much all the way up through high school. We have been able to keep in touch even though we have had very different paths, they've managed to cross several times through the years, and it always as if no time has passed. I love catching up with her and hearing what all is going on! She is at such an exciting point in her life, having just graduated from college, met the man of her dreams and planning her wedding. She's such a beautiful person inside and out. Always a lovely smile on her face and a big hug waiting for me! We have made SO many great memories over the last 18 years (wow! that's nuts!!) and I look forward to many MANY more in the years to come! I Love you miss Lindsy Bow and I'm so excited for all the wonderful things happening in your life! *but i think it should be happening here, close to me!!* :)

Lindsy & I at her graduation party this year.. right after AnaB was born.

October Challenge! Haha

2010-09-15T13:09:00.000-05:00

So I am totally digging this September Blog challenge and I don't want it to end. It kind of feels like a myspace survey question only I get to go into detail! :) So in order to continue the fun I searched online for some ideas. I literally googled.. "Myspace bulletins" And found a whole website dedicated to just that.. myspace bulletins haha. So here is my October challenge! Hopefully it will turn out just as good!
Take this survey

1. What is more difficult: looking into someones eyes when telling how you feel, or looking into someones eyes when they tell you how they feel?
2. Think of the last time you were angry. Why were you angry?
3. You will die in three minutes. Last call?
4. If you could do anything OR wish anything, what would it be?
5. You can have one of the following two things: trust or love.
6. You are walking to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss told you if you are late one more time you're fired. Do you save the dog?
7. Would you or have you ever blackmailed someone?
8. Think of the last person who you know that died. You have the chance to give them 1 hour of life back, but you have to give one year of your life. Do you do it?
9. Are you the kind of friend that you would want to have as a friend?
10. Does sex=love?
11. Are you old fashioned?
12. Would you marry someone if they were unable to have sex?
13. What would be harder for you, to tell someone you love them or that you do not love them back?
14. What do you think would be the hardest thing for you to give up?
15. Romantic love, when was the last time you told someone you loved them?
16. If you had to go back in time and change one thing, if you HAD to, even if you have "no regrets" what would you change?
17. Imagine. It is a dark night, you are alone, it is raining outside, you hear someone walking around outside your window. WHO do you wish was there with you?
18. Would you give a homeless person CPR if they were dying?
19. You are holding onto your grandmother's dying hand and the hand of a newborn that you do not know as they hang over the edge of a cliff. You have to let one go to save the other which one would it be?
20. When and how was the last time you told someone how you REALLY feel?
If You had three months to live:
21. Do you tell anyone or everyone you are going to die?
22. What do you do with your remaining days?
23. Would you be afraid?

Now I know there are only 23 days to this one and there are 31 days in October.. BUT October 23 is my birthday so I'll blog every say til then! :) And maybe then I'll take a break OR just find another challenge! Hope its just as fun as September and maybe some other people will join this one as well!

I miss you!!! (the curse of the Nicki's!)

2010-09-15T11:27:00.000-05:00

Well, day 15 is about the person I miss the most... obviously it would have to be my husband. Thousands of miles away and all i want is to snuggle up with him at night! But alas, I have blogged about him before.. so I'll move on to 3 girls that I miss and what a coincidence.. their names are ALL Nicki (or Nikki, or Nickie) haha. Its like they all got together and decided that each of them would enter my life at different times, make me love them, and then they each moved states away!!

trip down memory lane hehe Nicki C and I a looong time ago!

My first case of the Nicki's is from miss Nicki C. :) She was one of my high school buds! I remember senior English and all we could do was goof off and sing john mayer songs and make up silly words to go together.. (ie Sunscreen & Panties.. Boxer briefs and broccoli) :) I remember one day close to the end of the school year when we some how got out of class together and decided that it was a good idea to "run through the halls of our high school and scream at the top of our lungs" Although I'm not sure we implemented the screaming part ;) Either way it was hilarious! We moved from high school buds to long distance college friends and when I moved home we hung out a bunch again. Then shortly after I got married, she decided it was a good idea to move to La! Not cool.. anyway, now that I live back in the home state (TN) and we both have sweet little girls, I miss her like crazy and desperately want her to move back here too!! So Miss Nicki.. get on that would ya! ;)

Nikki and I in our apt. being silly!

My next case of the Nikki's came from my college roommate. Oh man... I know I've already blogged about this girl, so all I will say is that she is coming to visit me from California in less than a week! Woop Woop!!! And I'm SUPER excited!!!! :D I was informed by her hubby that my job is to convince her to have another baby :) hehe... I'm on it Al!!

haha Nickie and her hubby, when we went to Opryland to take Christmas pictures :)

My last case of the Nickie's (certainly not the least though!) comes from my Nickie T. We met when Eric was stationed in NC, her hubs is in the air force, and they were stationed at the same base. The church we went to there had lots of small groups and we met in a group titled "Young Married Couples Without Kids!" haha it fit at that stage in our lives but within the group we kind of formed a few different groups and moved out of the bigger setting and started to hang out on our own. Nickie and her hubby and 2 other couples and E and I hung out a LOT while we lived there. When we moved back here, we were glad to be here but sad to leave our friends behind. We stayed in touch with Nickie and her fam though and when their time came to get out of the military we invited them to live with us for a bit until they got on their feet and figured something out.. (really it was my ploy to try and get them to live in the area forever with us, because when I get a case of the Nickie's, I get it baaaad) ;) So Nickie, her hubby, and their twin boys (7 months at the time) and their dog, Emily, moved into our tiny little house for a while, and when things didn't go as planned for them they moved away.. all the way up to Michigan and made me miss them terribly! While they lived with us Nickie worked at a coffee shop and learned to make some YUMMO treats! I miss her bubbly happiness and the way her positive outlook always cheered everyone up! :) And I definitely miss the laughter that their whole family (especially Spencer) brought into our home. I will get to see her in January though and I'm oh soooo excited to meet her new baby girl Holly and hopefully see the boys again!! :) (Bekah, can you make sure you have your baby then too so we can all rub kids together!) hehe

So... Those are my Nicki's (or Nikki's or Nickie's) :) I miss them so! I hope no one else has to suffer so many cases of the Nicki's like me!

Day 14... Thanks FB

2010-09-15T01:40:00.000-05:00

Someone I've drifted away from? Hmm. There are a lot of people. I make friends pretty easily and as I grow and change so do my associations. I lose common ground with people and gain it with others. Different stages of life call for different types of relationships. For example, I no longer associate with guys, unless through my husband. I know to some people that sounds silly and whatever but for me and my marriage, out of respect for my husband I keep my close friends in the genre of female. Another example is that of married vs. single, or parent vs. non-parent... It may seem like these adversities shouldn't make a difference in a relationship, but they do. During the dating process, when you know you've found "the one" you stop relating to people who don't understand, or who try to tell you its wrong. And in the 9 months it takes to have a baby... the friends who don't understand what its like to be pregnant and not want to go out at night or do anything for that matter, well they tend to drift away... So as I've grown and changed there have been a lot of relationships, not necessarily lost, but changed for sure. On the flip side of that coin, I have made some really great relationships and met people who've truly enriched my life for the long run.
I view the drifting as a positive thing because as much of a people person as I am, I don't think we're designed for that many close relationships with people and I think all things happen for one reason or another, so I may have drifted out of some one's life to make room for another person who can really benefit them. Thanks goodness for social media sites like Facebook, so we're all able to stay in touch even if it's just to click on a picture to see how someone is doing or see a status and offer words of encouragement or advice. Through today's technology, its hard to drift away from people completely, because you can always see whats going on in their world. :) Thanks FB!

I'm So very sorry

2010-09-14T00:16:00.000-05:00

Well, day 13 is a rather humbling day. As a part of life we make choices and can never escape the consequences. I usually try to make the right choice for what I know to be true at that particular time and point in my life. But as with everything there are times when those choices involve others and in doing whats best for myself in that particular time or situation I ever so often, hurt another. Though out my high school days, I left church and entered my school hallways as a judgemental do-gooder. I stood on my pedestal and passed judgement on those who I thought were "not-doing the right thing" or who didn't follow what I thought to be the "right" thing.. out of love I often said or did things to show my judgment and tried to shove my point of view on others. To those people I apologise.
In college, the group I surrounded myself with was that very same way and I quickly learned what it felt like to be judged in the worst way. I acted out against what they thought was right and tried to do my own thing and still fit in with them but rebelled against them, probably to cause drama. To them, I apologise.
I make selfish decisions even now as an adult. I react to people or situations in irrational ways. I take things personally when I shouldn't, I ostracise others for no reason. But in all I hope those I've hurt understand I never have ill intentions toward them. I never truly mean to break a friendship or hurt someone else.
I think, well I KNOW there are people I have hurt tremendously in the past but even now as I reflect upon how I've reacted to certain situations and how others have reacted towards me, there are two individuals I feel I must apologise to. I don't think its appropriate to air out the details of.. or maybe I'm too much of a coward to admit in writing how I've hurt someone else.. or maybe its that I have no words to fill in the blanks of lost friendships... either way, Jenna, I had no idea how badly I hurt you and I'm so very sorry. I knew there was pain but I was too blind and too busy to notice or take into consideration how my actions were affecting you. I hope we can be close again because even though I may not have a good way of showing it, I miss you and your friendship. I never stopped thinking of you as a very best friend. Sarah, I'm not even sure you'll ever see this, but I'm so sorry for the way I acted towards you. It was childish and irrational. I judged you and tried to force my beliefs on you. I should have listened and been more understanding. I hope that we can reconnect someday and be friends again because I miss you, and I miss your influence on my girl, you were always so sweet to her. I wish you so much happiness in your new adventure! He's such a cutie!

My spin on day 12

2010-09-13T23:42:00.000-05:00

Well Day 12 of the blog challenge is supposed to be the person who I hate the most or has caused me the most pain. I wont lie.. its my husband. (minus the hating part!!) You can only truly be hurt by someone when you are completely open and transparent with them. I love him with all my heart and even though our disagreements and whatnot are almost always caused by a lack of communication or misunderstandings, he is the one in life who hurts me the most and causes me the most pain.. because he is who influences me most. He knows me better and has seen me as no one else can or ever will. I am so grateful that he is the one who can hurt me the most because he is the one who makes everything better. I absolutely love how he can turn an argument into talking about how much he loves and adores me... (is that a coincidence... hmmm, I might have to start watching out for that! it might be a trick to get out of a few things ;P) *jk* I can't name any one argument or moment in our marriage when hurt me the most.. well maybe a couple moments more so than others.. but you get my point, haha. He is who I trust and therefore, because he is only human.. and a man... we have moments where we misuse each others trust or misunderstand that trust, love or intentions, and can even react out of spite for each other.. But those moments and what we learn from them are what makes our marriage and level of commitment stronger and deeper.
So, Thanks E for making me love you and reminding me even in the midst of a misunderstanding and/or in the middle of my stubborn-ness, that we will come out stronger better people in the face of adversity and our love will never falter because of the little bumps along the road of life! All my Love, All my Life!

days 10 & 11

2010-09-13T23:18:00.000-05:00

Day ten was some one I don't talk to as much as I'd like to. That's tough because there are a LOT of people I wish I talked to more! I get caught up in the bare minimum of Facebook and email or at more a text message. I need to get on the ball.. get OUT of my house and make some home visits! Especially now that Charlotte is in school twice a week! I have plenty of time to at least make some phone calls.

Day 11 was a deceased person I wish I could talk to.... I'm so glad I put this off til today. Its grandparents day and that's who I miss! I lost my paternal Grandmother, "Memaw" when I was 10 and the only memory I have of her was sitting in her lap and being so comfortable and loved. I think that's where I get my "crawl up in their lap" feeling, that's how I describe how I feel about some people when I meet them.. I could just crawl up in their lap and be hugged and loved on.
Most recently, well, more specifically in the last few years, I lost my remaining 3 grandparents. Starting with my maternal grandmother "Grandmommy", I miss her so very much. I don't think I appreciated my grandparents enough until they were gone (typical) but I spent a lot of time with her as a kiddo. She kept my brother and I after school and I have small snippets of memories from that time. After her, I lost my paternal grandfather "Papa", I honestly don't have very many memories of him, just big family gatherings with him there. No personal interactions, but I have a feeling he would had a lot to teach me if I would have asked. And lastly, in January of 09' I lost my maternal grandfather, "Grandaddy" and I'd have to say I miss him the most. He was truly full of life and it was agonizing to watch him without his wife of so long. Its hard to hear people talk about seeing and hanging out with their grandparents or sometimes even blowing them off! I just want to shake them and make them realize how much they'll miss them when they're gone. It's still hard for me to see elderly people walking around by themselves, I know they're perfectly capable and all and I don't think they need keepers, I just remember taking Grandmommy Christmas shopping and having to fill out her checks for her and put her hand in the right place to sign because she couldn't see. I just wish I could've wiped all their ailments away and let them pass of mere old age instead of illnesses and brittle bodies.
Anyway, that's who I miss the most.

Day Nine.. and I don't care who knows it!

2010-09-09T17:51:00.000-05:00

Day Nine: Some one I want to meet... Well This one was a breeze for me.. there is someone I've ALWAYS wanted to be best friends with from the first time I heard her.. She's beautiful, she's talented, she's someone I want to be like. I don't know her personally (obviously) but Amy Grant has always been my favorite "famous person". She was my first concert ever!! I was 8ish.. maybe 10? Or it could have something to do with her living in and being from Nashville, I do love it so. But either way, I have never faltered in having her as my all time favorite artist. From her pop days with Baby Baby, to now as she rings old hymns and writes songs like them, I never fail to relate to her songs. I have read her book Mosaic and feel connected to her though her stories. I pick up the book anytime I feel like I've drifted from my past and need a reminder of the simplicity life is meant to have. I think that's why I just love her so much, I see this kind of simplicity in who she is, even though she is a professional musician, who I'm sure makes LOTS of $$$.. she has roots and stays grounded in them, (or so it seems, from the outside looking in).
This is from her new album.. I love this song :)

there were only 3 people in my life that inspired me to dream of having curly hair and to do anything to make it happen... Amy is one of them :)

I just get amazed at the simplicity of her beauty.. (which I'll admit could just be one heck of a make up job)

I totally dug that she married Vince! They just fit!

I *heart* her! :)

One day, one of those benefit concerts I told you about.. the ones my family and I will be hosting twice a year in our large country home.. Well, She's going to be there... and she'll just fall in love with us and want to be my Bff.. I have believed this whole-heartedly all of my life... and it will come true... I know it.

I'm on top of my game! Day 8!

2010-09-08T23:57:00.000-05:00

So I'm trying hard to keep on my game with the blog challenge :) Day 8 is about my favorite internet friend. Well for me, I have a lot! Being in the military, we've moved a couple of times (we're really lucky to only have lived at 2 different bases) and we have friends kind of all over. I've found the best (aka easiest) way to keep in touch is though internet and social media sites! I have a lot of "internet friends"! And right now sadly my hubby is one of those! Ugh.. I hate long distance marriage... its sucks... there really is NOTHING good about it! Anyway, back to internet friends... I'd have t say my favorite.. the one I keep in touch with the most.. is Mrs Nikki Yaste :) She was my college roommate at FGCU, and boy did we have fun! :) Haha it makes me laugh just thinking about all the stuff we did around the apartment and around campus! We were in a sorority.. sort of.. I don't think we EVER paid the full amount of dues.. nor were we EVER on time to meetings. Plus we made fun of most of the girls in it anyway. :) We've been best friends ever since! We have our moments when we don't talk or life gets in the way and a few weeks or a month will pass by and we haven't talked or communicated but... we always come back to each other. This girl has a sense of humor like no other! Cracks me up non stop! But on a more serious note.. Let me tell you a little about my Nikki, she has more passion in her pinky than anyone I've met! She's a fireball for sure and as lovingly and acceptingly as she can, she'll tell you the truth if she knows you need to hear it. I have loved watching her and her family grow as a unit. They are truly amazing parents and their sweet Mason man is such a cutie! He's a lucky kid. The determination to succeed and their love for each other has grown tremendously and its such a beautiful picture from the outside looking in. I always love to hear what new thing she's discovered. Sometimes her ideas seem outrageous to me, but once I listen to them fully and understand how she came to enjoy it, its usually pretty easy to see and sometimes jump right on board with! I'm so VERY excited because Nik is coming to visit me in just a couple weeks! YAY! :) We're going to have so much fun!!

So.. Something went a little weird with the pictures and I don't know ow to fix it..

Roomies! Nikki, me and Holly

The Yaste Family! Alex, Nikki, and Mason man!

Nikki right before she went into the Air force (circa 2005)

ok combining Days 5,6,& 7! :P whew!

2010-09-07T13:34:00.000-05:00

I'm trying to catch up! Sorry! :)
Day 5 was My Dreams.. *yesssss* One of my favorite topics because Eric and I often take the time to dream! We have LOTS of big dreams but of course they all stem from our love for each other and our family. One of my favorite things to dream about is our future home. I often go to this site to look at house plans and get decorating ideas. I can't wait to have a HUGE house for hosting family get-togethers and other parties! I want our house to be the house where all the kids come to hang out. :) Another one of my dreams is to be a Certified Hypnobirthing Practitioner, a Doula, and a Breastfeeding Counselor. I can't wait to be teaching Hypnobirthing to the nurses in the hospitals! I'd love to travel to different hospitals around the state or even country teaching willing participants how they can help women seeking more natural holistic births instead of insisting that they do things the nurses more medical way. As for being a doula, I only want the certification for the purpose of proving to people that Yes I do know what I'm talking about. Most people really don't take me seriously and it kind of drives me crazy. Same with being a Breastfeeding Counselor, although I do look forward to being able to really help women have a successful breastfeeding experience from the very beginning.
I also have lofty dreams for my family... I want to one day (soonish) to be able to have a private tutor for my children to be able to lean at home or when we travel. I want my husband to be home with us every day and to be able to pick up and go on trips whenever we want. I plan to host large charity events (in our large home) at least twice a year and have my children plan charity events every school semester. They'll pick something they're passionate about and plan the event all on their own and we'll foot the bill for whatever it is they want to give or host for others. I want to teach them that giving is a part of daily life and not only can it be in huge amounts of either time or money but it can be something as small as lending an ear to someone hurting. I hope that we'll be able to be an example for not just our children but for other families as well to show people that Love doesn't necessarily come in the form of a religion or with stipulations.. some people just want to LOVE.
Those are my Dreams :)

Ok so Day 6 is about a Stranger... And I'm picking a facebook friend. A. because I have never met her, and B. because she intrigues me! A guy I dated in college is married now and for some weird reason or another his wife (girlfriend at the time) requested to be my fb friend.. if i had to guess, she fb friended me bc I am an ex of her hubby's and she wanted to keep tabs (I totally would!!) haha. Maybe not, but oh well. The reason she intrigues me is well, for one she Pregnant (I know I'm such a dork! but I can't help it! I just love those pregnant bellies and all that goes along with it!!) and another is I really think we would be great friends if we actually knew each other! From her fb profile (go ahead call me a fb stalker.. but hey she friended ME) we have a lot in common, but I also know that those are superficial things. When I think about being real friends with her I think about all the things I'd love to learn from and teach her. Ok enough about that because I'm sure it looks weird to other people.

Day 7 Today My ex's... there are so many.. I once counted all the boys I'd kissed before I got married.. it was well over 40.. But I can safely say that I did save myself for marriage despite all of those kisses ;)
Anyway, I'd say there are only a handful that really had an impact on me and taught me a little something about life. The lessons I learned in dating were things like, don't expect less than what you know you deserve, and looking back, I know that even though the boys I dated didn't always treat me like they should have or even appreciated who I am, it was simply because I was not the girl for them.. and obviously they were no E$ ;) I think of those relationships and great training for appreciating my husband and all that he is for me, to me, and with me. I was able to know he was the one because of all the wrong ones.. When he poured his heart out to me and told every detail of how he felt about me and where his life was headed.. I knew, because none of the boys I'd dated were man enough to own up to such responsibilities as a woman's heart. I'm so thankful for all the choices I made and the boys I let influence me, just enough to learn something positive in all of those relationships, because of them I was able to open my heart to a true man and allow him to show me how to be truly love and to truly love him. I look forward to sharing my experiences with my daughters when they get to that age of curiosity about boys :) I have a whole memory box of notes and souvenirs from past relationships :) stuffed animals and all! ;)

So now I'm all caught up on the Blog challenge days! Hopefully I can stay that way! :)
Ps.. I'm about to go pick up C from her FIRST DAY OF PRESCHOOL!! YAY! I've missed her today!

Sofatso

2010-09-07T00:18:00.000-05:00

Uncle Jim & Charlotte

Day 4 of the Blog challenge is Siblings :) I like this one! Mostly because I love my siblings oh so much!! I have one older bother and two sisters-in-law along with their husbands. My big bro and I have a language all our own. It mostly consists of words like Gay, Fat, Ugly, Baby, and other one liners like that. :) You might look at that and see a negative conversation but nope.. its hilarious and totally makes all kinds of sense to me.. and to him! :) I get a text that says "What" or "where" or sometimes even just a "NO" and I know exactly what he's asking :) He's the BEST uncle my girlies could ask for! :) I just love that he can't get enough of them! He asks ALL the time when Charlotte is going to be old enough to spend the night with him! :)

I also love love love my two sisters in law! :) I seriously couldn't have asked for better family to marry into. They challenge my thinking and allow me to challenge them. There is such a huge capacity to love within the family and it gets uncovered more and more as the time passes! I love getting to spend time with my sisters and learning more about them. We are all learning how to be better family members and learning to be there for each other. Such great memories I have with my new family and of course there are many more to come!

I will have to add pictures of my sisters in law later But for now...:)

I sure hope these two have a great relationship :)

Day 3 Blog challenge.. parents!

2010-09-06T03:17:00.001-05:00

I have always has a good relationship with my parents. Both of them! Even though they may not have loved each other, they sure loved my brother and me. Its hard to relate to those books on repairing the damage that bad parental relationships have. Like to me, the book Captivating, was all about fixing "daddy problems".. well I don't have any! My Dad treated me like a princess and because of that he taught me to expect nothing less from the boys/ men in my life. And then there are the books talking about fixing issues sprung from a poor motherly influence.. I don't fit in there either! My mom has always been a strong influence on me and I find myself just like her most of the time. Sometimes it gets me in trouble being a little too hard headed but most of the time, it helps me to keep my values and stick to what I know is right!

Even better than my relationship with my parents is their new identities as grandparents!! I absolutely LOVE seeing them interact with my girls! :) I have no doubt my sweet girlies know they are loved! How could they doubt it with so many people spoiling them every which way!

You know, I know people with all kinds of relationships with their parents, some who barely talk, some who are really like best friends, some who still fear their parents, some who can;t stand their parents.. its so interesting to me! I wonder what kind of relationship I'll have with my kids as they get older.

I've always said if only she had a penis..

2010-09-06T03:15:00.001-05:00

Hehe Ok so I'm catching up on my blog challenge.. day 2,3,4, & 5! :)

Day 2 is "My Crush" and while of course I love my husband and crush on him daily (more like hourly.. but I'll call that lusting), there is one other person in my life that is so much more than a best friend. I used to say that if she had a penis, we'd be married. My more than a bff Chelsie, has been there for me through out all kinds of phases of life. My wild boy crazy high school days, my "trying to find a husband" college days, my "ok now I'm done with boys (but i still want to kiss a few more)" days, and right up until I met E where she helped me keep my head out of the clouds, a VERY tough job, while being so supportive of every decision we were making in our relationship. She's the type of friend that will pop your zits for you when your nails are too short, or will make sure you get the perfect tan for your wedding by laying out with you.. in the buff, and giggle every time there's a noise bc you think its the neighbors. She's someone I've cried with, cried for and would for sure do anything for! I call her when I need to hear the truth from someone other than my husband. We learn a lot from each other's different personality types and interests. I would say that honestly she's as close to me as Eric is, only we don't procreate.. nor do we try.. :oP

To sum it all up, next to my husband (and kiddos), this girl is my lovie!! :)

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Woah... Throw back to high school days with Chels, Allison and me.. looking fab :P

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Back in the day :)

When Chels came to visit me in NC.. Charlotte was in my tummy :)

WOW this is the most recent pic of us i could find! 2 summers ago! We need a photo shoot!

September challenge Day 1.. My Best Friend

2010-09-01T12:21:00.002-05:00

Well I commented on a friends blog a few days ago when she took on the challenge, that it IS going to be difficult to not make every blog about my sweet hubby.. So While he is my very best friend I'm gonna branch out and blog about a semi-new friend. Someone I know will become a life-long friend.

Wikipedia defines a best friend as: "someone with whom one shares the strongest possible kind of friendship(s)."

At this point in my life I feel like I have more than one person I consider to be a best friend. They are people I either "do" life with on a daily basis, or one of those people I can just pick up and talk to any time and no matter how much our lives have changed or how long its been since we last talked, the ease and depth of the friendship is still there.

I'd have to say that I really feel like "doing" life with others daily and just being a part of and letting others into your life leads to the long term friendship that no matter what its still there in its entirety. At this point in my life someone I consider to be a part of my daily life, is my good friend Darin. While we've only known each other for about 9 months, (long enough for both of us to have new little babies)! I met her this past January at a Super Bowl party (of all places! haha) at her house. I barely spoke to her, or anyone else, that night because everyone was VERY focused on the game. The next week, however, we joined the small group that, at the time, met at Darin and her hubby's house. I learned that Darin and another girl in the group were pregnant (like I was at the time.. and every other woman on the planet). It took a little bit of time getting to know everyone, and I kind of felt like an outsider because of our "different" views on pregnancy, birthing and really life in general. The more time we spent together we realized that our families were really similar and that we had a lot to learn from each other. We spent time walking together in the last month of my pregnancy. Darin and her hubs came over to help for a bit with Charlotte at the beginning of my 'contractions' with Anabelle. And Darin invited me into her birthing process when she had her sweet girl a couple of months later. It was probably the most A-MAZING experience, other than my own babies. :) And now we are once again walking together WITH our babies and can sit around like cows nursing our babies and chatting about whatever. :) We started a "home-ec" class together (she's much better at it than I am). She's in her home state of California right now visiting family and friends and showing off baby Reagan and I miss them! :) I'm so bored with out them around haha. I am confident in saying that our families will continue to be friends for a long time. We have many more walks to go on and babies to have and memories to make!
So anyway, that's who I picked as "My Best Friend". Tomorrow's blog is about "my crush".. I think you'll be surprised who I chose to write about.. or maybe you wont be. :)

Before Babies! :)

After Babies!!! :D

A new Blog Challenge!

2010-08-29T23:41:00.002-05:00

Well the Lovely Jenna has posted a blogging "challenge", and I am going to try to follow along and do the same! I'll start on September first and try to blog every day of the month following this:

Day 1 — Your Best Friend
Day 2 — Your Crush
Day 3 — Your parents
Day 4 —Your sibling (or closest relative)
Day 5 — Your dreams
Day 6 — A stranger
Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush
Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend
Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet
Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to
Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to
Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain
Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you
Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from
Day 15 — The person you miss the most
Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country
Day 17 — Someone from your childhood
Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be
Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad
Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest
Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression
Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to
Day 23 — The last person you kissed
Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory
Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times
Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to
Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day
Day 28 — Someone that changed your life
Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to
Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror
So fun! Hopefully it'll be enjoyable.. I've already got in mind who/what each one will be about! :)

I've put this off long enough...

2010-08-17T00:21:00.001-05:00

There's a theme amongst the blog world these days.. It's called 4 Simple Goals
So I guess it's my turn now. The reason for just having 4 goals is because the deadline for completion is the end of the year... so I have roughly 4 months to:
Go healthy! I've never been much of a healthy eater, but for some reason I crave it now. The craving started last month when we took a trip to see my in laws in Arkansas over the 4th. We don't eat very much fast food and that trip we ate it for breakfast lunch and dinner the way there and at least once on the way back... I was miserable! It was the most disgusting feeling ever and I haven't had any kind of fast food since. No, I take that back, we ordered a pizza before E left. But I keep the fridge stocked with Veggies and little willpower to make them. So part of this is a cooking challenge and part of it is the actual eating challenge. Its super hard to cook right now for just myself and the girlie, but what better time to start when, lets face it, she's not going to judge me if I make something and it's gross, we'll just regroup and eat something else that meal. I've been doing a lot of reading on different ways of eating healthy, and some of my conclusions are, pasteurized dairy= BAD, so cutting WAAAAY back on our cheese consumption. The only other dairy we use would be sour cream, and its pretty infrequent. Another find is bad carbs like breads and pasta= BAD, like fake energy. We're just not active enough to benefit from a diet with lots of carbs. So we wont be cutting out carbs completely because we do still want to enjoy eating, we'll be cutting WAAAAy back on those too. Those would be the two biggest ones, but there's also the obvious eat more fresh veggies, (and veggies in general). Moving onto the next goal:
Be Creatively Inspiring: I recently started an "inspiration journal". *recently as in yesterday* And I've really enjoyed exploring what inspires me. And when I talk about being inspired I'm talking about being inspired to create. not just make stuff, but Create! Its things like flowers that I'd like to grown in a garden one day, or a specific color that just really makes me want to paint it all over the walls because it embodies what my spirit is going through. Anyway, I want this to be something I can continually add to. Its like an inspirational dream book. And one day I'll have a big studio room in our house with endless opportunities to create.
Next is to Give! This has been kind of an on going discussion for Eric and I the last few months. We really feel led to give more, well give in general. He and I have different passions and ideas for how we should utilize our new found "tug on the heart strings" but I am really excited to start changing lives. This is only the beginning. We've been disussing how we want to be an example for our kiddos and that one day when we have endless resources and time, we will be teaching our children to put together and entire charity event. They'll choose the charity they want to support and will plan an event to either raise awareness for their charity or raise funds for it. But the bottom line is that it starts with us, right now. So freeing up the money we want to give means cutting back on a lot of things. We keep saying we're going to cut the cable and just do our netflix, so there's some extra $$money there, like I said this is just the beginning. It'll be a work in progress, but I can't wait to see lives changed because of our family and its legacy.
And the last goal is to Make a daily schedule and follow it. Notice how I left the "follow it" part un-bold.. Well that part isn't as important as the making part. I'm not a regimented person.. at ALL.. but I do know that we would benefit from some kind of schedule, some kind of routine. Charlotte starts pre-school soon and I'm looking forward to this because it forces a schedule on us. I want to be able to plan things out better so I know whats going on and can get things done better.
And I'm going to add a fifth just because I'm a little stubborn and have to be different: :)
Read a personal development book. I used to really enjoy these types of books and read them all the time, but now, after having kids, I can barely concentrate on them. It takes me a really long time just to read over a sentence and have it fully sink in. So It may take me a while but I just want to read one staring out. I'm going to start with How to Win Friends and Influence People.

So there are my Four Simple Goals before 2011. Hope this inspires you to do the same and then post a link back to the original blog

Week 1 of the last deployment ever!!

2010-08-12T15:03:00.001-05:00

So apparently blogging is harder to do with two kiddo's, I'm either busy with one or both of them or soooo tried I can't think straight. I guess I have to blog is short easy sentences so I can keep up with myself. I've started, deleted and restarted this same blog like four times. And each time some one has either started crying (like just now) or is asking me for juice, a snack, lunch, a TV show, or anything else she can think to ask for as soon as she can tell I'm occupying my mind with something other than kid-related activities... (ok just got baby settled)... (again)...

I guess the first week of deployment is always the hardest.. or I hope anyway. We started out ok but as the week has worn on and the sleep has gotten less and less I'm starting to run out of steam. I so used to getting a little extra time in the morning to sleep in and wake up on my own. And especially in the last couple of weeks while E was off work, I got to sleep in a lot and leisurely wake up with the baby. E usually makes breakfast for all and we get to start the day out pretty relaxed. Now.. I get woken up at all hours with, Momma, I pee peed in my bed, or, Momma, I need to go potty, (meaning she peed in the bed), or, Momma I'm hungry lets go eat. And Not being a morning person, this doesn't go over well with me. Especially having to change sheets EVERY morning!
Let me back up a few and give you the run down.. Last week, a few days before E left, my neighbor posted that their little man was totally potty trained (night time too). Charlotte has been daytime potty trained now for almost a year! But those darn nap time/bedtime diapers were getting to be the death of me! We were washing them in normal clothes wash (bc they were just wet) and they leak like crazy now, the elastic is shot and the Velcro doesn't stick! So anyway, I was super jealous of the neighbors diaper freedom. That night... as I was changing her sheets (a chore I ABSOLUTELY DESPISE doing!) I asked her if she even wanted to wear diapers. She replied with No so we explained that she had to keep her panties dry and keep her bed dry to not wear diapers. we told her that if she had to go potty at night to just get up and go and that she didn't have to call for Momma or Daddy and she could just go. The first five nights of this went GREAT! She slept all night with dry panties and a dry bed. I was so excited, thinking I would not have to deal with diapers on a 3 year old while E was gone. Well, that was short lived... Starting Monday night and every night since she has wet her bed... EVERY NIGHT! Ahhh! Right now, she is out of sheet because they are all getting washed! :P So every night this week she's woken up at some point in the night (or very very early morning) to tell me she peed... Grrr

So its back to diapers... I'm so tired of changing sheets!!
And as for baby AnaB, She's teething... yay... I'm working on getting to Nashville to get her an Amber teething Necklace. (Hopefully this week sometime, we can come down for some pool time and maybe a zoo trip) So she's been super fussy with odd sleeping patterns. She's getting better though the last 2 days she's slept in the morning for a bit and then again in the afternoon for a bit then another little 30 min evening nap before bed. Earlier this week she was up though out the night as well.. adding to the sleep deprivation. Wed. night I slept a total of like 3 hrs before I was supposed to be up and getting ready to meet a friend at the Zoo. I had to call and cancel because a) I was dead, and wouldn't last long, and b) Charlotte was still sleeping and actually she slept in until 9 then let me and baby sleep an extra hour and a half after that while she vegged out with some Playhouse Disney. We then had a p-jammie day ALL day!

I've got to find some way of having time to myself that is also productive and beneficial to myself, my well being and the well being of my family.. So like working out, reading a book that's not a novel or even just getting something small done around the house. Once I do something small I will usually continue to straighten up the rest of the room or even the rest of the house. I just have to get out of survival mode where every second I can occupy my mind on something it goes straight to facebook, email, or TV... UGH! all mindless activities that are completely NON beneficial (well except fb, I think that's a healthy outlet for self expression and connecting with others in a small way).
So... starting today, I'm going to take an hour of every day and either read a "self help book" exercise in some way, clean up a mess I've made (not one the kiddo's made) or BLOG! :)
Sorry you've had to sit through my mess of a lonely week... It will get better!

Woah... Umm Hello 2 and a Half Months Later...

2010-07-20T01:07:00.001-05:00

I know, I know... its practically been a lifetime since the last post! But to be honest... the last post is a little hard to follow! So how about a quick bullet pointed fill-in on our new life as a `fun little family of four!?! :)

* Miss Anabelle is an A-MAAAAA-ZING baby! She is so chill! Totally laid back and loooves to watch her silly big sister laugh and play! :) She makes everything more fun and totally does NOT help me wanting to have another right NOW! :oP But I think I'll enjoy my girls for a little while longer ;)
* Big daddy E is shipping out in a couple of weeks now.. insert sarcastic enthusiasm.... ugh! No actually its only a few months long so definitely not bad at all and it will be a perfect little time for me to get into a groove with these 2 girlies! The last deployment was the biggest person growth spurt for me. I feel likeI really came into my own skin during that time and have since continued to blossom :) So I'm looking forward to seeing how this next little break from each other goes. I know poor E is looking forward to having the time to himself to "shape-up" too. Mind and body! Both of us have been a little lax in our physical activity.
* I'm going to try and get in shape to do a little 5K in October! Hopefully that will get the baby flab off my mid-section before the hubz gets back. He'll come home to a smokin' hot wifey! ;)
* Charlotte turns 3 in just over a month!! Ahhhhhh!!! I can't believe it! She actually start PRESCHOOL this year!!! I'm so excited for her too! She loooves to play with other kids and I am looking forward to seeing how much she grows as a littler person over the next couple of years in preschool! After preschool we plan on homeschooling for our own personal reasons, but I think this will give her a great perspective on how to listen and pay attention when someone is talking. You know how its hard to learn things like that from people you are close to.. like, my husband can tell me something and I'll take it with a grain of salt, but if someone else outside of the situation says the SAME thing, I listen and more times than not, take their advice... I think kids are the same way sometimes. They need to learn respect for their parents from an outside influence and the more they see others agree with it the more they will practice things like that.

*Business has really picked up! I am so excited and proud of my hubby! He is working so hard for us! We have just a year and 4-ish months left in the military and we have decided that Eric is a work horse and probably wont be able to completely stop working when his contract is up. So, we're looking into all of options for a smooth transition into the civillian world. So far the things we have considered/are considering are EMT/Paramedic, Firefighter, some sort of sales, another small business opportunity from a close friend, Boarder Patrol in AZ or CA... and a few others... its all exciting to me :)
*The Doula stuff has been sooo much fun! I still know lots of pregnant girls on FB right now although the number just dropped today.. (Congrats Tracey!!) I was able to be a support in a friends brith which was Oh So Fun! She was AMAZING, and it was honestly (just short of my own births) the greatest experience of my life! So much joy and excitment and aww, all in one moment! I love to sit and think about that room full of tears as that sweet baby made her way into her Momma and Daddy's arms! :) Just Precious! And my Doula has passed a client of hers to me for the next couple of weeks while she is out of town! Which is so cool! This will be my first "official" client! We're meeting on Thursday! (EEEEEEEE!!!! ... little giddy girl squeal!) :D I am hoping to be able to be there for some of the other girls I know are preggo! :)
* I also have discovered the course to become a certified Hypnobirthing Practitioner (instructor!!) WOOP WOOP!! :) So excited about this! (Almost more than the Doula training, bc the Doula stuff is something I can do with out certification) Wanna know how cool Hypnobirthing is? I am still able to use the techniques I used during labor to get rid of stomach cramps and headaches along with any other body issue or ache that comes along! It amazing what intense relaxation can do for the body! I was even able to help my hubby tonight using some it! He had a nasty headache and even threw up from it! (ew) But he finally gave in and let me help him relax and he fell alseep and as far as I know has been sleeping it all off :) We'll see in the morning i guess!

Well I think thats all for now. Hopefully I'll be able to keep up with the blog, now that I've broken the ice from the last post. :) I might even try to pick a themed day.. Like IAT.. Interesting Article Tuesday! :) or FBPF... Fun Baby Post Friday... or how about Top Five Friday, where I pick my Top 5 favorite somethings and write about them on a friday... Hmmm
I'll have to think aboiut it and come up with something good.

Ps Nikki, Unless you are writing right now, I think I beat you!! But you still have to post a new blog.. because I.. uhh.. said so? no.. because I miss them! and you! :)

Here's some fun pictures! :

I do just Love love loooove her!!

Anabelle Ruth 4-30-2010

2010-05-04T00:34:00.001-05:00

I have to say, if you had asked me last Thursday if I truly believed my birthing experience was going to be exactly what I wanted, I would have told you no. I was a week and 4 days past my due date and feeling like my body was not working properly. My thoughts were really beginning to drift to there being something wrong with me. However, I was proved very wrong. I'm going to share my birthing experience and I have to warn you, I'm not going to hold back. You're going to read about the entire experience and it is graphic in some parts. I'm also going to share pictures that you may or may not want to see. To me they are an amazing documentation of one of the most defining experiences of my life to date, but to you.. they may not be.. So if you're not up for reading about vomit, mucus, nudity, breasts, and the beauty of the "pain of labor," you may not want to continue. But I'm game if you're game!! :) Hope you all enjoy my story of little Anabelle's debut appearance.

Thursday morning around 4 am, I woke up (for the hundredth time) to a contraction and tried to turn over to my other side. I immediately felt a sharp pain in my lower abdomen, beneath my humongous belly, almost like pulling a groin muscle. I thought I died. I could hardly go back to sleep but the pain eventually susided and I started my day just as I had the previous days of that week and the week before: overdue and frustrated at the lack of sleep due to inconsistent contractions, or surges as we like to say. My mom came in town to visit for lunch that day and we had some YUMO Mexican food (thank you El Toro!), and then I took Charlotte to meet Eric at the hospital for our, what had become routine, "post-date" appointments. These appointments consist of a non-stress test twice a week and a visit with a provider once a week. Since our last "post-date" appointment with our midwife, we had declined to schedule an induction date and so we had to be referred to an Obstetrician. This is because we had become a liability to the hospital if something "goes wrong." So, Thursday was our appointment with Dr. Farr. We'd met him before, at the beginning of my pregnancy when I had some scary bleeding and clotting. He was nice enough. He came into the room assuming I was like all other patients and said "Ok, Lets check your cervix, and see what we're looking at." I calmly and simply asked if it was a necessary procedure, and he replied with a puzzled "No". I told him I'd rather not know what my cervix is dilated to because it isn't any real indicator. He said fine and asked me to lie back for the AFI (amniotic fluid index) test. Since this is also a very routine "post-date" test I have no problem with it. It actually reassured me that we were doing the right thing. Dr. Farr's nurse started to ask when she should schedule our next appointment and NST, to which he replied "Oh no they can't have another appointment, we need to schedule an induction and get this baby out." Eric quickly stepped in and said, "No Sir, we're not planning on inducing." All through this conversation the Dr is looking over the ultrasound measuring the fluid around little Anabelle. The results came out great (again) and with my NST from that day being so great, at this point there was still no reason for scheduling any induction. Dr. Farr did not agree. He informed us that there "isn't a doctor in the country that would condone letting a woman go past 42 weeks" and "it is against his better judgment" and "if it was his baby, he'd already had an induction scheduled".. and my favorite "you'll have to sign a waiver, releasing the hospital and myself", to which we obliged, of course. We walked to his office next door and sat down like we were being interviewed. The man was nice and respected our wishes, all the while looking down upon us in the most nonchalant way possible. He thought he knew best and was determined that we felt the same... we didn't. He typed up his form and we signed it and left.
I took Charlotte home for naps and Eric went out to do a few business meetings. I had a few surges (contractions) during the nap, making it difficult to sleep, but I woke up to the surges getting stronger and stronger, and more uncomfortable. I woke up at 6 when Eric got home and I think that was when I started to think.. this might be "it." We thought about grilling burgers for dinner but as the time went by, really just 30 or 40 minutes, Eric decided cooking would not be the best idea right now and that he wanted to be able to focus and be there for me if I needed him. We finally picked a place to get food from around 8 or so. Ruby Tuesdays is right up the street and their New Orleans seafood dish sounded sooooo good (it later turned into a HORRIBLE mistake, which I'll explain a little farther down). We called our friends Darin and Russ to come play with Charlotte for a little while until my mom could get here, and also called our Doula to let her know we had started the birthing process and that we were ready for her to be with us. Rhonda (doula) came in about 45 or so minutes and my mom got here shortly after that. We had a full house for about 5 minutes, but Darin and Russ left when my mom got here and Charlotte was in the bedtime process so my mom took over that arena and stayed busy with her. Soon enough it was just me, Eric and the doula in a quiet house. With each surge that came I would close my eyes and focus inward, isolating myself from what was going on made it easier to breathe through the surges. We found an application on my phone that times contractions (can we say *HANDY*!!) and used that to keep track of them. Before dinner they were anywhere from 30 to 50 seconds long and 10 to 15 minutes apart. By the time the doula got there they were getting to be 5 minutes apart on average and about a minute or so in length. The most comfortable position I found to help me focus and not tense up, was to sit Indian style either leaning back against something to keep my head relaxed or leaning forward with my head drooped forward. The reason for keeping my head relaxed is to keep my neck and shoulders relaxed which in turn, for me, keeps the rest of my body relaxed. The surges are mush easier to breath through when all the muscles are relaxed and free of tension. When tension enters the pictures the body starts to panic and sends stress signals to the brain. Staying relaxed and calm, focusing on the truth of the situation makes the body do the opposite and can even release pain relief signals. When I say the truth of the situation I mean the fact that the birthing process is completely natural and my body was made to do exactly what it was doing. Resting in the fact that I was ready to go through that and knowing what was to come made things so much easier. I spent some time on the couch breathing through and timing each surge. One thing I found so comforting was my doula softly encouraging me and mentioning when she could see tension creeping into my forehead or shoulders. It was like she was this voice in my head just a calm, inspiring relief. I eventually moved from the couch to the bed to try and get some rest for what was to come. I wanted to labor at home as long as possible but the thought of it being too late to make it there started to creep into my thoughts. I got up a few times and went to the bathroom. Believe it or not, going through the surges while on the toilet was easier than in the bed or sitting on the couch. I don't know if it was because my pelvic bone was opened more or what but I stayed there for about 10 minutes one time. When I got up that last time it was right after a really strong surge and I stood too soon after it, I'm not sure it was completely gone but it made me nauseous and as soon as I got next to the bed, I started heaving. All of that yummy New Orleans Seafood came right back up.. it was naaaaaaasty. And the worst part of it was I threw up all over one of my favorite throw pillows for our bed!! It was a big square pillow that was green and flowery... so sad. It smelled awful and ugh.. it was just gross all the way around. I feel bad for whoever had to deal with it. Our doula came in a little later and gave me a massage and helped through a few more surges. One of the things I had read about was women vomiting when the baby starts to transition, meaning start to move from the uterus into the birth canal. So with this thought and the fact that my surges were now 2 to 3minutes apart and about a minute and a half to 2 minutes long i really felt like I was far enough along to go to the hospital. Eric started packing up the car, and letting my mom know what was going on. The Doula got her things together and we got in the car. The drive on post wasn't as bad as i thought it was going to be and we made it there in just a few minutes. I got into a wheel chair because at this point sitting was the easiest way to relax and stay focused through the surges that were coming over and over, some of them with no time in between. I was kind of getting nervous because I wasn't sure how our requests were going to be perceived and if we'd even be able to do most of the things we wanted.
This next part is what Eric likes to brag about :) It makes me feel good too, haha.
When we got up to the front desk at the Labor/delivery center, the clerk looked at us with a disapproving eye and in a doubtful tone asked, "And what are you here for?" Eric told her that I was in labor and that i was at the point that my contractions were 2-3 minutes apart and lasting almost 2 minutes in length. She didn't believe him!! Because I wasn't screaming and tensing and yelling, she thought we were lying. She called back to the triage area and said "I've got a couple here that says she's in labor and her contractions are 2-3 minutes apart" and then in a more hushed voice she added, "She's not showing any signs of labor or contractions, so i don't know if she really is." But they came to the door anyway and took us back to the triage for an initial check in. They hooked us up to the monitors (for the second time that day) and said they would send someone in to do the IV line. Eric quickly stepped in and said "we'd like to decline that" and the midwife reluctantly said, "Well I don't have a problem with that but i think the OB on call might, so we'll just leave them out of the loop. I'll bring by a form for you to sign in a minute." We were blown away at how easy that was! And then after they took the little sheet of paper from the monitors and walked out, i took the monitors off. They did NOT feel good on top of my confined belly. Eventually they moved us into a room.. it was, of course, fabulously HUGE and gorgeous. Nice hardwood floors, a rocking chair, a pull out couch (not chair! a couch!!), flat screen TV with DVD/VHS player, and most medical equipment was hidden from sight. We requested to be monitored intermittently and they were fine with that, they only came in every hour or so to check the baby's heart rate and make sure we didn't need anything. We signed a few papers declining pain medication and other things they like to offer. Other than a nurse coming in to check the heart rate, we were left alone, and it was wonderfully peaceful there. The lights were off except for maybe one and Eric sprayed the room down with a Lavender room spray, then also sprayed a dose of the Lavender linen spray on the bed. We brought our own big comfy pillow, which was another thing that kept me relaxed. Just having something familiar in an unfamiliar place makes your body calmer. I was able to stay relaxed the whole time and even in between the surges I would fall asleep sitting up. It was this level of consciousness that kept me here but in my own world where nothing else existed other than myself and what i was experiencing. I "labored" this way for a few hours, with the surges coming every minute or less and lasting well over 3 or 4 minutes each, eventually they just started rolling on top of each other and not giving me any breaks for what felt like 10 minutes or so. (it probably wasn't that long but in the moment it felt like forever!) I'm not sure what Eric and the doula were doing. Every once in a while, when they could tell I was struggling to stay focused, one of them would lightly rub my back or lay a hand where I was needing to relax, like in my shoulders. There were a few times Rhonda, the doula, would run her thumb over my forehead... oddly enough it was heavenly. I LOVED having the support of my husband and the Doula, someone who'd taken the time to get to know us and build that special trust level with us. From the aspect of femininity, it was empowering. It was like I could feel her empowering me in subtle but meaningful ways.
Around 4 a.m. we decided to try to sleep some. So Eric and I laid down in the bed and the Doula got comfy on the couch. I have to admit, at this point, I got so annoyed because Eric, my support fell asleep almost immediately, and although laying down made the time in-between surges easier, it was definitely the most uncomfortable way to "labor." It was in this time that I found a really strange way (but the best i could come up with) to get through the surges as they had become the most intense they'd been so far. You will probably laugh your tails off at this but what helped me make it through each one was the phrase "Ride the wave". :) It was something the Doula said maybe once or twice during a surge and it almost immediately stuck to my brain. When a surge would reach its peak in intensity, the only thing that would help get me through it was to picture a little man on a surf board, surfing on what looked like the steady heart beat on paper, like a print out from the heart rate monitors. It was like a paper drawing in my head and I would hear this song going along with the little surfer man. Any of you moms might know this, but there's a show on Disney called Chuggington and the song for it has a line in it "Riding the Rails" and that's what played in my head except it was "Riding the wave" haha. Also the song from Winnie the Pooh, where he does his exercises in front of the mirror and sings "Up, Down, Touch the ground" played in my head. I have no idea where that came from. I think maybe at one point as I was focusing on the "waves" on the paper in my head, I was telling myself, Up and Down, Up and Down, haha. Anyway, That's what helped me the most.
It started to get light outside, and I'm guessing it was around 6:30 or so when they came in to check me and we all kind of woke up then. I will say that shortly before waking up, as we're laying in the bed, poor Eric got the "wake up wood"... I almost cut it off... haha. Instead I just scooted away so that it wasn't poking me in the butt anymore. :oP Ugh... MEN. haha. I didn't tell him about that until much later though.
Anyway, when they came in to monitor the baby we were introduced to the new midwife on call for the day. It turned out to be our FAVORITE midwife!! We were SO excited that Mrs. Hamby was going to be with us as we brought our baby girl into the world. She was the last midwife we'd been seeing in the clinic and had been the most supportive/informative/encouraging provider we'd seen through out the entire pregnancy! So YAY!! Soon after they were done monitoring, I went back to my focused composure as much as I could. Things were getting tough and in every surge I was thinking, "As soon as I can open my mouth and get words out, I'm going to ask for drugs or something.. maybe even a Csec!" I was quickly giving into the pain and I think everyone could tell. I literally couldn't open my eyes or my mouth for more than a few seconds to ask for water. It broke my concentration too much and it was hard to get refocused once it broke. After a couple of hours, (which sounds like a long time but in my state of concentration it kind of floated by, time was irrelevant), I was done, I broke and told Eric and Rhonda that I needed something, ANYTHING, and that I couldn't do it anymore. I was exhausted, and nothing was helping me get focused again. They were everything I needed them to be in that moment. They assured me that I had already done it, things were almost over and I had come so far. Eric went through the relaxation script and helped me get back into 'the zone,' I had to ask him to start over again, but I eventually got there. The doula suggested we get into the shower and she went to go get it started and warmed up. It was probably 20 or 30 minutes before I was able to get up because of the surges being one on top of the other. Once I got into that shower though.. OMG.. that was THE BEST way to labor. I might as well have had an epidural, the shower was just as good! I still had the rolling surges but I could hardly even feel them. My focus went from trying to make it through each surge, to focusing on the warmth of the water and where it was pouring on my back or my belly. I was naked, sitting on a bench and Eric had the handheld shower head. He wrapped a towel around the head to make it less abrasive and more like a waterfall. It was pure heaven in that moment. We stayed in there for about 30 or 45 minutes and then the midwife came in to tell us that she needed to get me on a monitor for just a little while and she was also going to check my cervix for dilation. Up to this point, my water had not broken and I had only seen the mucus plug about 4 hours earlier. So we made our way back to the bed and I decided to forgo clothes at this point because I was planning on getting right back into that heaven of a shower as soon as they were done. I was telling them I needed this to be over soon. They put the monitor on my belly and of course the heart rate was right on track and they asked me to lie back so they could check my cervix. It was so unbelievably uncomfortable and even though she was quick I was almost in tears at that point. But she came back up with a glorious idea!! She said I was fully dilated and she could break my water for me IF i wanted her to. Now, this was something Eric and I had talked about ahead of time and had agreed that it was something we did NOT want to have done. When I had Charlotte, they broke my water when I was around 6 or 7 cm and then I had to labor like that for a long time even with an epidural it was miserable and unnecessary. I could feel Eric stepping in to say that we needed to talk about it, but all i could think was how soon would it all be over if she did it. So I tried to talk over him to the midwife, asking if and how breaking my water would speed up this process. The midwife assured me that i would be ready to push immediately after.... BOY WAS SHE RIGHT. I felt the release and then an amazing urge to push. I don't think I've felt anything more instinctual than that moment. We turned to the side of the bed where the midwife was waiting about a foot or two away from the bed and sitting on a stool low to the ground. She explained the position she wanted Eric and I to be in; he sat on the bed behind me, holding me under the armpits. I was basically dangling off the side of the bed with my feet braced against the midwife's feet. (You'll see in the pictures) Still naked.. in case you were wondering... haha. And then when the midwife was ready (and since i was MORE than ready) I began to push.. The quiet demeanor I had held for the previous 14 hours was gone and I was pushing with all I had in me. It was loud... I started out high pitched because that's just what came out but the midwife instructed me that I needed to go lower and breathe in a growling manor... so I growled... and Eric laughed.. and once again.. I could have cut 'it' off... But he was also crying so I guess I'll let him keep his manhood for now :oP Let me tell you... pushing a baby out.. hurts... I thought my vag was on fire and I could have swore that it was never going to end!! But the midwife told me her head was out and I could stop pushing and just breathe in short breaths, like panting almost, and then, at 10:04 a.m. on Friday April 30th, 2010, (just a couple of minutes after breaking my water), her body came and she was amazing. It felt amazing, I could focus on her and hold her and love on her right then and there. They let us hold her before wanting to do anything to her. The women in the room congratulated us and uplifted me. They said they'd never seen a birth like this before and that it was so beautiful. I couldn't help but agree. The cord was clamped once it was done pulsing and the placenta was delivered a short time later. This sweet baby was in my arms and was just perfect. She nursed within the first 30 minutes and was a champ! She and I both knew exactly what to do. I wasn't groggy at all from drugs, I had a renewed energy, where I had been exhausted just an hour ago. I honestly can't imagine anything more amazing than just being alert and able to care for my baby right from the moment she was born. With Charlotte I honestly can't remember anything after she came out, I was so exhausted and worn out, I just wanted to sleep. I don’t think I slept that day until maybe 4 or 5 in the evening, and even then it was for short periods of time. I was so ready to share everything.
We stayed in the Mother/baby unit until Sunday. We wanted to check out earlier, but were told the baby would not be released until 36 hours. Since that 36 hour mark fell on Saturday night after 6 pm they made us wait until the next morning. No biggie, we had a wonderful nursing staff checking in on us and yummy food that we got to pick out and order from the kitchen. One nurse in particular was so helpful and informative, it surprised us! He (yes, HE) just really liked his job.
Since then life has been glorious! I have had an easy recovery, if you could even call it that. There wasn't anything to really recover from.. After C I had ugly nasty bruising all over "down stairs" and I could barely walk, I needed help in the shower for the first few days, I had a lot of weight to lose, and I had 2 small stitches that itched like nobodies business!!! But this time around, no bruising, a little swelling but that’s it and it was gone before we left the hospital. Since my abs had separated completely during my pregnancy, I've had some lower back issues but obviously that had nothing to do with the birth and is being resolved with light ab exercises everyday. Anabelle is already past her birth weight and is a champion in the nursing department! She is such a great baby. She sleeps at night in usually 4-5 hour stretches and during the day she nurses every 3 hours or so. She is awake more than most babies I've noticed, but when she is awake she is pretty chill, just kind of hangs back and watches her crazy sister run around like a wild woman! ;) She's already in her pretty diapers, I thought it would be at least a month or so before she'd fit into them but we actually had to make them bigger to fit her! Anyway, She is officially 2 weeks old today and is just an amazing girl! :)
Here are some pictures from our adventure:

Doula Massage :) Ahhhh

The love dance, during a surge

Mrs. Hamby came in for the first time to greet us! She joined the love dance, making it a love circle :)

She was giving the belly some love too

Being monitored

In the middle of a surge.. this was how I looked for 14 hours

Same

The belly... Woah

Working through it

The stance

In the "throws" as some might say ;)
Well hello there baby girl! Hope you like my editing :)

She made it!!

Hello baby girl!

Ahhh fini

hidden nip ;)

Cut that cord Daddio!!

hope you like my bra :)

Loving our girl!

Stats

First Family Photo!

Meeting Mrs. Hamby

Getting pretty, Daddy fixed her hair that day...

LOVED that nurse!

Nursing like a champ!!

She's a serious PRO

Meeting Mimi, Uncle Jim, and Big Sister Charlotte! :)

Hope you enjoyed this! :)

Imagine All the People...

2010-04-09T08:38:00.001-05:00

Something a lot of people don't really know about me is that I don't like church.. well you might already know that but you may not know that the word Christian or anything to do with Christianity TOTALLY turns me off. It gets under my skin like nobody's business. I don't read my bible, I don't take quiet times to pray or reflect on God. I don't have time. I acknowledge God as Love, something that is a part of my identity not someone above me dictating my life and making me feel guilty for 'sinning'. My spirituality is not something I often have or take the time to reflect upon, I simply don't have to. Its Love that I try to let guide me and in that Love I find confidence in myself and my own abilities.

I grew up kind of going to church with my parents just because it was what you were supposed to do, then we stopped because of my brother's soccer schedule. He would often have games or tournaments on weekends including all day on Sunday. We still did Vacation bible school for a while and little things like that but for the most part it wasn't something important in my house. When I was a sophomore in high school I started going to church on my own and the youth group I joined quickly became the 'it' place to be, and the group to be apart of. I always felt that most people that were there, only came for those reasons and I was participating in leadership roles and being a good christian, unlike most of the other's who came just to be cool or hang out with the good looking band boys ;) (something i quite frequently did too). I put myself on a pedestal because I was active and in good standing with the pastors and most of the adult administration in the church. I heard from a lot of the women that they could "see God's light shining from me".... Whatev.

I went on to college and continued in the same path. I went to a school a thousand miles away (literally) where I didn't know a single soul and quickly found my place in the same type of college ministry that my youth group had prepared me for. I spent time with the leaders, dated a couple of them ;) and when it was my turn, i took my place in a leadership position. I judged others for not being good people and I looked down upon those that partied (all the while envying them for their freedom). Something never felt right through all of this judgement though. I just knew there was more to life than heaven and hell and getting there and getting other people to go there. What about Now? What about the general compassion for people also known as Grace.

When I left Florida and came back home to Tennessee, I knew that God had something in store for me. I was back in cahoots with my BFF Chels, who along with her family were on a continuous quest to find TRUTH and Freedom among the madness that is Christianity. We read a few books together and she guided my mind to places I'd never even thought to explore. She still challenges me when she gets the chance (even though my momma brain doesn't hold too much extra right now). I met E who at the time was a literal Bible beater. He was a good man who was always in search of truth.. one of my favorite and least favorite things about him. :) We quickly fell in love and started on the Grace/ Truth journey together. We left the church building and became the church. Not in the institutional way most think of, we became a more literal church. We wanted to be in community with people and 'do life' with them. Not just show up at a big building sing songs, listen to some one dictate what they thought was the right way to live, and then return home not having met anyone. We learned that showing up to churches that have 'small groups" was KEY to our social survival. And have since gotten to know a lot of great people.

We thrive in the small group atmosphere and will continue to seek them out in whatever communities we migrate to. However, Eric is much more comfortable in these groups than I am. He still likes the idea of Christianity and reading his bible. I just don't. I get frustrated in conversations because a lot of times, even though the majority of Christians say "its not about religion its about 'relationship'," the religion, rules, and doctrine still come out in their conversations. They're still bound by rules and governed by fear, not Love.

The song "Imagine" has always ALWAYS been one that meant more to me than any other. Last night David Archuleta sang it on the American Idol results show and once again I was totally struck by the meaning behind the words. Take the very first verse:

Imagine there's no Heaven

It's easy if you try

No hell below us

Above us only sky

Imagine all the People

Living for today...

Christianity is so focused on this end result and how to get there or how to get other people there that they miss out on today and the beauty that is surrounding them.

It might sound silly but I had an encounter yesterday when I was driving in a parking lot. I was driving rather slowly through the parking lot, down an isle and another car was speeding through perpendicular to me. She was crossing the isles without even looking, and had my mom not yelled for me to stop she would have t-boned me. I would have likely been killed or at least the tiny life inside of me would have. I hit my brakes (which was easy since i was going the normal parking lot speed) and she barely even slowed. As she passed by she glared at me as if the potential accident was my fault.

I was immediately saddened and as my heart calmed down from the adrenaline rush, and she continued to glare at me, I became angry. The feeling grew and grew the more I thought about it. I was doing what was best for my family, protecting my daughter, my mother, my UNBORN, and myself. She was selfish enough to put all of that in danger, potentially take it all away from me, and then blame me with her stare! I started to think, how often I stop to think of another person's perspective. How often when driving do I think of the van in front of me that's going exactly the speed limit as a family, perhaps a new mom and dad protecting their new infant that is so very precious to them? How often do we step outside of ourselves and our immediate (wants and) needs and understand others' situations and LOVE them in those situations. Finding the TRUTH in situations often times means looking outside of our own perception of it and grabbing hold of a little compassion for what the other person may be going through. I know I'm not perfect and often times I'm extremely selfish, but every once in a while, those Love moments get me and bring me to my knees. Seeing the compassion in humanity and the beauty of it all, it just knocks me down. It's in those people who genuinely help others without ulterior motive. I know I'll drive a lot differently from now on, taking into consideration that those who cut me off might have somewhere more important to be than the gas station I'm headed to, or when I'm rushing because I took too long to get ready.

Funny little story

2010-04-06T10:22:00.001-05:00

So we went out for Mexican food last Friday and were meeting some friends. I decided on a cute long black summer dress (non-maternity style) and got kind of sassed up since i figured it'll probably be a while til i feel like getting cute like that again. The friends we were meeting we supposed to be a couple that we hang out with on a regular basis and then another of E's friends (who he'd not seen in 5 or so years) and his daughter. We got there a little early (something new for us) and got a table for 8, over shot just in case.. Well its a good thing we got a big table bc not only did the friend bring his TWO daughters but also his girlfriend and her son. They were a fun group of people, though. The 2 girls were around 8 and 9 and the boy was almost 12. He was a hefty kid and quite out spoken.. The first thing he did when they walked in was come over and look straight at me and asked.. "So, Are you Pregnant?!" to which i replied, "Umm, Yes, I am." He then asked, in a rather surprised tone, "How old are you?" I said "25", and the little wanna-be Casanova says... "Ahhh so old and yet you look so young." HA!!! What a punk! So the whole time he gives me the 'eye' and when my food arrives he comes over and sits across from me, and with a matter of fact tone he says, "So let me ask you a question, Is that food good for the baby?" Like this 11 year old kid knows more about nutrition and pregnancy than i do, hahahaha. I told him , "Yes, the baby is going to thoroughly enjoy this quesadilla!" hahaha I honestly wanted to punch this kid for being such a punk, I mean he really thought he was doing some serious macking on me... poor guy, he's doomed to a life of loneliness if he doesn't learn a thing or two. E told me later that when I went to the bathroom, the kid came over and sat down next to him and asked "Where's the misses?" haha like he needed to keep track of me. Anyway, it has made for a funny story to tell and I wanted to share it again! :)

**UPDATE**

38 weeks now and still no sign of the baby girl. We had a great Easter weekend. E had a 4day and we spent Friday just hanging out. We cleaned out our cars and then took naps and just relaxed the day away. Then went to my mom's for the rest of the weekend. Saturday night E and I had a date night and went to dinner and a movie. We saw Clash of the Titans, it was a good movie, I have always liked the original so it was fun to see it remade. And of course it was GREAT getting away from the wee one, even though we talked about how much we missed her most of the time haha. Sunday we spent the day with my mom's side of the family. Lots of candy, bubbles and running around for the little ones :) Charlotte has a BLAST! Monday I got my hair re-permed and chopped off. Its going to be sooooooo easy to take care of! (Yesssss) And We went to the Zoo with my dad and had a GREAT time! We bought E a Droid Eris from Craigslist and he's going to get it activated and all today! I'm So excited for him! :) Now we are just waiting for the babe to get here.. just waiting. haha Our big awesome rocking chair is getting delivered today! WORD! That's about all, I might add some pictures of the new hair do later when I get a chance to fix it. I have to wait a week to really fix it since i got another perm, but I can spray it with some water and make it cute for now :)

Peace, Love and Chicken Grease!

Latest and Greatest at an ungodly hour

2010-04-01T00:46:00.001-05:00

Well, here we are.. its about 10 minutes to 1.. AM that is.. Ugh! I'm not really even tired. So I thought I would fill the public in on our final decisions for welcoming Miss Anabelle Ruth into the world.. (when ever that may be) :oP
We have had a couple of appointments since the fiasco with the not-even-a-midwife-overbearing-nurse-midwife. One appointment with an OB and one with a midwife. The ob was alright, she was encouraging in the fact that she patiently listened to our requests and was receptive and up front with her answers. The Midwife we saw today, however, was phenomenal! She not only answered our questions but also mentioned somethings we were thinking of asking with out us even mentioning them. She was positive and open and encouraged us that we can have whatever experience we want as long as mom and baby are healthy, something we have wanted to hear all along. She excused all liability issues saying, that if we were going to sue her that was between us and God :) she had a glorious southern accent and said "Mmmm Kaaaaaayyy" in the same way the teacher or whatever he is on south park said it. :) I kind of fell in love with her.. a little. hehe

We also have had an appointment at what we thought was a birth center up in Kentucky. It is about an hour or so away from home and mainly run by OB's. And actually we came to fine out that when you go in for delivery, you are in a hospital.. not a birth center. The midwife we met with was of course amazing but still a little more strict and under more pressure to uphold certain rules and regulations of the hospital she works for. She answered our questions and we toured the L&d/Mother-baby units of the hospital, and it was an overall pleasant experience. To be able to be close to there without laboring in the hospital we'd have to get a hotel room to labor in for however long before we go in to be admitted, plus change the insurance and the facility was still not as nice as the hospital on base.
So after our appointment today with the most fabulous of midwives, We've decided to go on base. Even though its not my ideal birth its what fits for now and its a compromise that E and I have come to. A happy medium. Especially with our Doula, who we met with again tonight. She's also someone I kind of LOVE! She gets us, he husband is retired military and actually had the same job as E. I know with she and the hubby as my front guards, we'll be able to have a smooth birthing process and it will be exactly what we want and hope for!

Something else exciting is that we came to a decision last week that after Baby A comes and is settled into a good enough routine, I'm going to start Doula training!! Wooop Woop! :) I'm super excited and I chatted with our Doula about it tonight and I'll be able to take my time through the program and go at my own kind of pace. I really can't see myself charging for it. To me its being there for friends or making friends and helping them... it seems strange to charge for that. So, if you want someone to support you and your partner in birth anytime.. I'll be there! Just let me know!

Well that is just about all the news for us. Maybe I'll be able to sleep now..

Whew! Drama Drama Drama!

2010-03-23T09:19:00.001-05:00

I'm going to start on a positive side of things with a funny story :) Yesterday, Charlotte and I had some errands to run and we met E for lunch. While I was getting ready she came into my bathroom and insisted she needed to help me put on make up or put some on herself, So I dug out an unused eyeshadow sponge and put some sparkles on it (yes I keep sparkles in my makeup... you never know when you'll have to dress like a fairy!). She poked herself in the eye a few times but enjoyed putting on makeup with Momma. Then as we were getting ready to walk out the door I was putting some things into the diaper bag and her little face just lit up! She ran into her room saying "Oh! I'll Be RIGHT back Momma!" and came back out with her little leopard print purse. She stuffed a My little Pony in it and a plastic spoon (one of her new obsessions). So Yesterday she walked around Babies R Us and the Army base with her purse on her arm right at her little elbow, and carrying her baby doll (another obsession that NEVER leaves her hands except when baby needs a bath). :) She was a hoot yesterday! SO FUN!

Now, on to our appointments last week.
If, you're not up to date on our baby status, here's a small recap. I am 36 weeks and last week we finally came together and talked about Where and with whom we are going to deliver miss A.belle Ruth. We looked at all of our options and decided we wanted to look for a midwife to do a home birth and also to speak with our midwife at the hospital about our birth plan to see if and where they were going to give us a hard time. I had a really hard time finding a midwife that would come to us, he were turned down by a few and given one last name by several of the ones that turned us down. After E calling and leaving a message with her, she returned our call and drove 2 hours to see us and talk about what we wanted and what needed to be done from that point... That was last Friday.

The midwife came at around 10:30 Friday morning. I opened the door to a woman standing before me in a long blue jean dress and a white sweater. She had socks pulled up to her knees, and white leggings on under all of that. Her hair was greying naturally and was pulled back out of her face with a white cotton headband it matched her sweater and leggings. Needless to say, it was obvious she was extremely religious, and to me it was almost uncomfortable. Trying my hardest not to judge a book by its cover we sat down in our living room and I got Charlotte ready to go play outside while we were talking. The midwife was very nice, but very reserved. She handed us a booklet and we talked about our reasons for going this route and what we were looking for in a birth. She mostly address E since we had mentioned he was the one more reservations and that I had done my homework as far as home birthing and midwifery. All was going well and then we opened the booklet she had made for us. She went through a few things and she got to reasons for transport... Ugh! "WHY?!" is what went through my mind at this point.. she had nearly ruined the experience for me at that point. She talked about stalled labor and how if we were to transport, we had to sign a waiver saying we would be compliant with whatever the dr's wanted. This to us was a sign of her lack of self confidence... its was disheartening to say the least. In her booklet she states that she is trained in IV's and can do them but prefers that, in situations where an IV is needed, as long as there is time, to wait for the paramedics to arrive to preform the IV. Lack of confidence. The way she talked about her previous births and how she was working with the hospitals, it seemed to us that she is prone to transporting her patients.. not something I want to fork out $2500+ for if I'm just going to end up in the hospital anyway. E said there were 2 moments where in his head he thought.. "uh oh" one of which was when she mentioned stalled labors and the other being when she said... SHE HATES CATS... Yep, you read it right.. This woman said openly in front of me that she hates cats. That was pretty much it. I have an appointment with a group of nurse midwives that this woman works under on Wednesday to see if I'm even eligible for a home birth. I guess there are certain requirements you have to meet for some midwives. I plan on going to the appointment but pretty much just for the sake of getting that approval if we happen to find another midwife. Since Friday, we have gone through her booklet a few times and every time i look at a new page I find something else that exudes the lack of confidence on her part or her willingness to comply to hospital requirements. She even looked at the birth plan we were taking to discuss with provider at the hospital and she disagreed with almost everything on it... WHAT?!! Yeah she was not what we were looking for. I really could continue on complaining about all the things that she said but I'll move on to our next fiasco from Friday...

Our appointment at the ob clinic was supposed to be at 2, so we got Charlotte up from her nap much earlier than what she's used to and headed on post. I got up to the little sign in Kiosk and slid my card in. The screen read my name and said my appointment was for 2:40.. and with a different provider... Umm... What?! So i head up to the desk explain that my appointment was for 2:00 and with so and so. the girl behind the desk explained that my provider had gotten married and moved away about a month ago (must have been right after my last appointment with her) And that the reason the time was different was because the provider I was seeing that day probably didn't have a 2:00 slot open. Ok, now I can understand all of that.. but no one bothered to call and tell me. What if the appointment had been earlier and I had missed it?! Anyway, so we waited and waited and played games and ran around the hallway with Charlotte (getting dirty looks from nurses and doctors). When we got called back I explained that I needed to get the Rhogam shot because I hadn't had it yet and she literally freaked out. This little woman rushed in fussing at us and saying that I could have died and killed my baby because I haven't had the shot yet... (not true) and that if i didn't get it that day that something could happen over the weekend and my baby and I could bleed and die. (WOW.. over react much?!) So then we mentioned that we were hoping to talk to someone about our birth plan and that we were considering a home birth... OMG.. you would have thought I committed suicide right then and there. She just about lost her head running around saying that was irresponsible and that we needed to speak with the Chief of Obstetrics in the clinic and start seeing an OB instead of a midwife in the clinic and this and that. AHHH!!! it was hard not to laugh in her face. She said that no one in the hospital would endorse that decision and that women come into the hospital all the time with dead babies because they tried to have a home birth... yes she said this... She explained that there are complications all the time and that at home there are not tools to take care of them. I responded with "Yes ma'am but there are also complications in the hospital and women lose their babies here too" She said, Well that's true. This was the appointment where I was to be tested for Group B Strep.. something I thought about refusing simply because I was negative for it when I was pregnant with C and the odds of me having it now are VEERY slim to nil. But since she was already fussy I decided to comply.. its not a serious kind of procedure and when I was tested before they gave me the swabs and asked me to swab myself in the bathroom. Not the case this time. The little woman, who we came to find out is not even a midwife but a nurse practitioner, said she was going to do the test and took the Cotton swabs rather forcibly and swabbed me I was actually surprised at how rough she was. I understand being upset with a patient but seriously.. there was NO NEED for that! I plan on filing a complaint about this little woman at my next appointment on Thursday.. Of course its with an OB because she insisted that we speak with one :P (however the Chief of Obstetrics was not available for an appointment until April 12th) (Oh AND she said to make sure we get THAT appointment with him because we needed to speak to him, haha.. that's like 6 days before my due date, I'm pretty sure by then we'll have our mind made up)

So anyway, After seeing her we went down to the lab and had my blood drawn for the Rhogam shot, the lab techs were HILARIOUS! It was the end of the day and they were just all cracking jokes on each other and the lady that drew my blood got it on the first stick (that NEVER happens). I should have stayed in there with them :) Then we went BACK up to the clinic to wait for the shot to be ready. It takes about an hour after they draw your blood. So we spent about two and a half needless hours at the hospital and left rather flustered. Poor E was really wound up.
So there you have it... our not so friendly encounters.

However, we have since found a doula AND a birthing center and have appointment with them. We are very excited about this new direction and are hoping it follows through and ends up being the end of our crazy decision-making process!

Another fun note is that we have everything ordered for Baby A and her cute little room. I am loving the new color and cant wait to get it all set up just the way we want! :) Our super-duper chair will be here in a couple weeks but everything else should get here in the next few days :D I actually just got the rest of our diapers in the mail today! like 5 minutes ago! YAY! We're planning to go to the hardware store tonight for shelving and closet organization.. her closet has to be completely redone because whoever lived here while we were in NC totally destroyed it.. I mean large holes and all in there. :oP Anyway, We are hoping to have everything set by the end of the week. AND E is taking me shopping this weekend for some nursing stuff and comfy/cute pj's to labor in. :) Fun!!

A little bit of whining mixed into an update...

2010-03-16T11:47:00.001-05:00

I know its been a while since my last post... sorry. We're busy with baby prepping and all of that business. I have a whole blog typed out in my drafts on breastfeeding but there's so much info, I don't know how to break it up and I keep getting distracted every time i sit down to finish it... we'll see maybe once I'm actually nursing again I'll have the desire to finish it. I'm sooo tired! We've done ALL this prepping; we know how to birth, we have everything ready for the most part and now... its the waiting game... UGH! Except it seems like there is SOO much going on! Every weekend is booked solid and on top of school Eric is working the business like crazy (a good thing, but frustrating). Baby girl is sitting so low I can barley sit down without being in total discomfort, and as soon as I stand up I feel like if I don't go straight to the bathroom I'll pee my pants in seconds :oP The sciatic pain has set in... so I don't get much sleep, and I can literally feel her resting on my hip bones sometimes, with her head on one hip and her punching the other hip. I'm just ready to have her out and in my arms :) We are making our finally birth decisions this week. Eric is too uncomfortable with doing a birth at home unassisted. I'm not going to force him into it, its not fair to him and puts me at more risk to be uneasy during the birthing process. So at this point our options stand as hiring a midwife and paying 3000 + for it... hiring a doula who'd be comfortable there without a midwife... a birthing center in Ky, that is basically the same as a hospital... or just heading to the hospital and taking our chances butting heads with everyone there. Its getting so complicated because I feel like everything is fighting against my desires and I should just give in and go straight to the hospital and lay there drugged letting them do whatever they want to me and my baby. The midwives I've contacted turned us down saying either they were unavailable to be a midwife or we are out of they're range of practice. Most of the midwives in Middle Tn are at LEAST an hour away from us, most of them much farther. I have one more name to contact, but judging by her website, I'm not sure I'd be comfortable with her. So we'll see, I'm just ready for all the decisions to be made and to get the show on the road. On top of making all of these decisions, we have a SUPER busy weekend coming up. We originally thought the events were spread out over the next 2 weekends but just found out that EVERYTHING is happening this weekend. So yay... Another busy exhausting weekend to recover from next week.
Lets see is there a brighter side to post about? I did recently get the most awesome phone in the world! :) Its a Droid Eris, It is made to rival the Iphone and in my book.. its way better! I LOOOOVE it! Oh and I had a prenatal massage last weekend! It was fantastic. We should have our tax return by Friday and will be able to buy the rest of the baby stuff and fix some things around the house with it as well as build up our savings quite a bit. That's all the positive things I can think of today... I guess I'm just having a Day, if you know what I mean. I could probably cry at the drop of a hat (thank you pregnancy hormones). Maybe its the weather.. it was sunny all last week and since last Friday its been cold, cloudy, and rainy... I got used to the endorphins from the sun... now I'm back into the winter blues.

The sun'll come out tomorrow, tomorrow... Right?!

Here's some belly Love for you :)

Its a big one!!

More on Hypnobirthing... its a looong one :)

2010-02-19T09:11:00.000-06:00

We had session # 3 of our Hypnobirthing classes this week! I am just absolutely loving this program because more than anything it builds confidence in myself and my hubz, and erases fear. I skipped writing about session 2 because the class was a short one and pretty uneventful. The material and skills given to practice in that session, though, have been phenomenal!
The guys were given a script to read to us ladies to bring us into a state of relaxation and as a way of bonding. I don't know if husbands or birthing companions realize what an important role they play in the birthing process. Not only are they trusted to be the encourager, in our relationship I have to put my complete faith that E will know what I need to hear and what I need him to do as well as he is responsible for making my wishes known and followed by whatever birth attendants we chose to have. He is in charge of a knowing the limits and not being pushed over by medical personnel who are just interested in just 'moving things along'. Lucky for me my companion knows a thing or two already about how the process works and what and when certain things are necessary. I have a smart cookie on my hands :) And I'm also lucky that he is taking an active part in doing research on certain things that are important to me and educating himself on things he may not be confident that he knows well enough. Anyway, that's just a little something I've been thinking. Back to the script... It goes through breathing encouragements and relaxing methods and then at the end you are either brought out of the relaxed state or left in it to go to sleep. Since we've been doing it at night before bed I usually go to sleep when we're done. I definitely sleep better! :)
We were also given the Hypnobirthing book and a couple of CD's to listen to. The book is pretty good, so far kind of repetitive of what I've been reading, but as I flip through it I can tell its going to get better and better! :) And the CD's are AMAZING! One of them came along with the book and the other is one our instructor added. So far I've listened to the added one more. It only has 2 tracks on it but each one is about 30 minutes long. Affirmation is the title of the first track; it is something I can listen to whenever. It's simply statements that are meant to uplift and encourage and to build confidence. Some examples are:

"I put all fear aside as I prepare for the birth of my baby."
" I'm relaxed and happy that my baby is finally coming to me."

"I trust my body to know what to do and I follow its lead."

"My body and my baby know how to work together in harmony."

"I feel confident, I feel safe, I feel secure."
"My muscles work in complete harmony to making birthing easier"
"My cervix opens and allows my baby to ease down the birth canal"
"My babies birth will be easy because I'm so relaxed and confident"

"My baby is correctly positioned for an easy delivery"

Anyway, you get the idea. Positive thoughts make for positive experience. The other track is called Relaxation, and it takes you through a 30 minute relaxation exercise that gets easier and easier every time I listen to it. I can completely get in the 'zone' in just a few minutes and am able to focus on certain parts of my body and control the tension/relaxation of that area. It amazing!! And at the end of it I feel like a million bucks!! I have relaxed every part of my body and then told it to energize itself and when I come out of this state of relaxation I am fully awake and energized like I could take on the world! As with anything the more I do it the easier it is, the deeper relaxed I become and the more refreshed and confident I become.
This week's session was all about the 'birth plan' and knowing that there are alternative options and what those options are. It's amazing to me coming to the realization that for the most part the medical professionals do not have my best interest at heart. They have certain procedures they are used to following and all they want is a willing patient that is uneducated and goes along with whatever they suggest. (not the case for me anymore) So here's a breakdown of the tentative birth plan we were given.
In the Pre-Admission phase, the request is to have all the required paperwork (including medical histories) completed prior to being admitted, as in, at a pervious appointment, or to have the birthing companion answer any questions so that I may focus on my relaxation techniques and manage my birthing process my way without interruption. That's a simple request that shouldn't be hard for any hospital or birthing center to comply to. They have your files on record and are able to pull them up easily, it's just that they don't want to, they'd rather have you go through all the info for them at that moment.
Upon hospital admission the request are, to decline IV prep and or a hep lock (where they put the IV line in and then just tape it off) unless and until special circumstances arise. If you think about it, when a patient comes in from a car accident, they are able to quickly put in the IV without problems and having one unnecesarily can prevent proper relaxation and potentially put negative thoughts into the mother. If a special circumstance arises, they can and will but in an IV then, and easily I might add, as it is such a routine procedure. Another request that seems common sense to me is to return home if examination reveals less than 5 cm dilation. The reason for this is the more relaxed environment you can be in while going through the birthing process the easier it will be and upon leaving you will negate any unnecessary procedures being done to you. Using intermittent EFM (electronic fetal monitoring) unless evidence of complication, is something I think we would have a hard time getting across if we chose the hospital here. The reason for this request is fetal monitor typically limit the range of motion and inhibit mom from moving with and how her body needs. Being up and active with your birthing process means you are able to better listen to and accommodate what your body needs to do or what position to be in. Also, if the membranes have been released (aka water broken) and birthing surges have not started (within 18 hours), we want to be allowed to return home with *IF necessary* antibiotics, as long as baby is ok. There's no need to be pressured by medical personnel for your body to start something it's not ready to start, i.e. surges (contractions). Some women release their membranes and don't go into active birthing process for a couple of weeks. It is perfectly safe to go throughout daily life and let things progress naturally. As long as there are no vaginal exams there is very little risk of infection. Nothing goes up there unless you are contorted in a way that keeps things open down there its not going to be a risk.. even in the bath tub. Actually some women release their membranes and the tear in the sack that enabled the release seals back up and the sack refills itself. Baby does not need oxygen yet, he/she is still attached to the cord and getting everything they need that way.
The next set of requests is for during the first stage of labor. I absolutely hate hearing women say that if they'd just been able to eat something they would have been able to last a little longer and wouldn't have gone in for a C-section. Our instructor actually said she's seen women in the hospital crying not because of pain but because of hunger. So the first request here is to be given nourishment if/when I am hungry. The reason they withhold it is in the off chance they have to do a c-sec and to be realistic.. it's not ideal for them but it's possible to do a surgery on someone who's eaten. Don't people get into car accidents on their way home from dinner? And sometimes those people who've just eaten a huge meal, need surgery... the doctors know how to work around that. So to negate getting to worn out to last through the birthing process, I'd like to snack on something healthy here and there throughout.. other than ICE CHIPS! :oP
We also request that the medical personnel and caregivers NOT offer any pain medications or relief, we will request them if we feel it is necessary. Women are at their most vulnerable state while in the birthing process and as a natural instinct will take the easy way out if it is offered.. I'd simply like to not be offered a way out unless I feel like I need it.

I want to be mobile and able to walk around and move with my surges. A lot of hospitals want to keep you in the bed and want to keep you stationary so you don't make a mess that they have to clean or whatever.
I want to change positions and assume birthing positions of choice. You know all through out pregnancy they say don't lie on your back because the baby will put too much pressure on the vena cava (the vein that pumps blood back up to your heart, lungs and such and also provides blood to baby) But in most cases women are forced and told to birth on their backs with their legs up, fighting gravity and using ALL of their muscles. It ultimately works against them and this is why tears and rips and forceps and vacuums happen. I've watched videos of women who give birth standing, squatting, laying on their sides, on all four's, leaning over the bed. Those positions just make more sense to me... work with your body, it knows what its doing, just listen and do it.
Sometimes, the birthing process stalls for whatever reason. In some cases women get anxious and fear creeps in making them tense up and work against their surges, or sometimes it just happens. In any case I want to be able to use natural means of starting things up again. In the privacy of my room, alone with my hubby, I want to be able to use nipple stimulation and cuddling. I don't want someone standing over me telling me I need to be injected with something to get thing "moving along". It will happen. As long as my baby is doing well I do not need to be told when to birth.
Another request is minimal vaginal exams, i.e. checking the cervix dilation. This often makes women anxious if they're birthing process is taking longer than what other expect it to. I have heard stories of women's dilation going in reverse simply because they became discouraged at their 'progress'. I do not care how far dilated I am, my body and my baby know what to do in order to make things happen and will do it without being told to. I especially do not need my membranes ruptured for me. I know this procedure can "speed thing along" but it's not necessary and can potentially be dangerous. If the baby is not putting enough pressure on the membranes then obviously they are not ready to rupture, and if the baby is not down far enough things like a prolapsed cord can happen (where the cord comes out first and the baby squishes it cutting off its own oxygen supply). All of these unnecessary interventions lead to unnecessary complications.
I want to be able to enjoy a shower or to labor in a tub. GOD I wish the hospital here had birthing tubs!! A lot of L&D wards have them now but they make you sign a waiver if you want to get in saying your baby could die of infection if you choose to use it and will not let you give birth in them. Ugh.. LAMOOOO! The use of water during the birthing process is the most calming and relaxing prop. It takes the weight off of your muscles allowing you to use them for the birthing process only and not to also support you while you're birthing. The last request is probably the most simple and compliable for hospitals. It is simply to have the use of a birthing ball. Most places allow this and some even supply them. It is used to open up the pelvic bone and stretch and work the muscles down there. And actually, the toilet has the same effect during labor. I've watched a video of a woman give birth while sitting on the toilet and when the midwife felt the baby was coming, the woman's husband and the midwives assistant lifted the woman up by her armpits which allowed the midwife to reach down and receive the baby. It was AMAZING!
I'll try to combine the requests for during birthing. We would like to be allowed to use natural birthing instincts to facilitate the descent of the baby, using momma directed breathing. I do not want to be prompted or told when to push. The analogy used in our class was, could you poop if someone was standing there watching you and telling you... "Ok,.. almost time, ... ok NOW PUUUUUUUSH!" haha I thought that was hilarious!! I would like to be allowed to let my body push when it know it needs to. Again, I want to assume ANY position when birthing. Our instructor said she's seen women crying because they were forced unnecessarily to lay on their backs and birth when they wanted to be on the hands and knees or standing. So sad! I do not want a perineal massage during birthing process, while it is beneficial prior to labor; during it can be painful and disruptive to my relaxation methods.
These get a little more specific so I'm going to split them up a bit more. I want to delay the clamping of my baby's cord after birth. For me personally, I want to wait until the placenta is delivered. Cord blood banking is such a popular thing now a days, why? Because science has proved the incredible benefits of this blood. It is especially important in babies born in 'distress'. A baby does not need oxygen right away as long as it is still attached to the cord, he/ she is still getting what they need from the cord, and probably more of what they need that way than from being disconnected from mom and whisked off to be "examined" and cleaned. If and when the baby is being suctioned and 'cleaned off I want her with me, she is happier with me than with someone who doesn't care about her and it is simple enough to do the suctioning and wiping down while she's in my arms or on my chest. I want to nurse her as soon as possible to let her know that I am here for her and will provide for her always. I want to be allowed to deliver the placenta naturally, without being given a shot of pitocin to stimulate surges all over again. My body knows what to do here too; it will work its magic on its own. Sometimes it can take up to an hour for this... that's ok! I will however accept from my companion or myself a uterine massage or nipple stimulation (i.e. nursing my baby) to assist in placenta expulsion. There's no need for anyone to pull on the cord to get the placenta out or for drugs that will put me in pain yet again, or for someone to manually extract the placenta... so back off unless there is an emergency that requires you.
My requests for my baby are simple enough I think. I want her to stay with me, in my arms while her vitals are taken and for measuring (in the absense of an emergency). I am perfectly fine with the vernix (white stuff) absorbing into my baby's skin. It's actually healthy for their delicate skin. Even though they may not mean to medical personnel just don't care about my baby as much as I do and if you go back and watch them clean/bathe your baby you will see how harshly they scrub the sweet newborn skin. It's already sensitive enough without someone scratching it off of them, and most of the time the baby is screaming the whole time anyway. I will bathe my baby for the first time and I will do it lovingly, understanding that she is used to being curled tightly and kept warm in my tummy. She isn't going to like being out in a tub with her arms free to flail around, that's scary for her. My mother in law actually gave Charlotte her first tear free bath because she wrapped her in a towel and just washed one little area at a time while she stayed wrapped up in the towel. Every bath up to that point she cried and screamed and I cried too. It was stressful on all of us! :oP I do not need to send my baby to a nursery to be taken care of and on display for others, she is mine and in order to establish a good nursing routine from the beginning and so she knows she is safe with us always, I want her to remain with me or my husband.
I'd like to delay the application of salve or erythromycin on her eyes so that she can see me properly and know who she's bonding with. We will be breastfeeding several times within the first few hours to stimulate milk flow and to begin the bonding process asap! I do not want her to be given any bottles formula, paci's, water, or artificial nipples because it can severely mess with our latching process.
If we were having a boy, one of the request specifies circumcision or not, (we would not). And the last few we talked about in class were the administering of vitamin K and the hep B vac. Vitamin K is given because until about day 8 baby does not have the ability to clot their blood. The only reason they'd need to is if a baby boy were being circumcised or if other medical procedures are required. We're opting out of vitamin K for now I think, as long as she doesn't need it. And the hepatitus B vaccine is administered in the off chance that mom had hep B or if baby comes in contact with bodily fluids or dirty needles of someone that does have hep B... not likely in our case and we will probably opt out of this one too for a little while.
The request for is presented in a matter-of-fact way and more kind than I have probably portrayed it to be. I just remember what it was like not knowing what was going on and why things were happening and no one bothered to give me all of the options.. they went with what was easiest and most convenient for them. Thankfully it did not reach the point of a cesarean and we made it out of there with a happy healthy baby girl the first time.

Eric and I have already decided that if we proceed to the hospital for the birth of our baby girl, HE will do most of the talking and dealing with the medical staff there. :) I will not be nice, I have a hard time being nice even through our prenatal visits now.
So that was class #3 in a nutshell. We are working on our breathing and relaxation techniques and its working out fabulously.
Next blog will be about the shower we had this past weekend.. it was fabulous!

Playing House

2010-02-09T18:13:00.000-06:00

In light of the "Holiday of Love and Pinkness".. aka Valentines Day, I thought I'd post today about the story of how I met E!

Its actually more inspired by http://racheldenbow.blogspot.com/ <--- That blog along with a my friend's blog post that was just totally sweet. She was uplifting her hubby because she is so proud of his most recent accomplishment and of their lives and all he does for her and her son.. *sigh* so sweet to read of happy couples! :)

So anyway... let me take you back.. waaaay back...

All the way back to February, 2005. I was a lonely girl that had just moved home from college, working at a telemarketing job that was SOOOOO not my thing. To say the least, I was lost in the sauce! I was barely 20 years old and trying to figure out what life had in store for me because after my 2 years in college and having multiple failed relationships with boys that were just not in the same place as me, i was pretty fed up with it all and ready for something new. Not looking (but always secretly hoping) for a guy, I was trying to focus on myself and my future. ( if you know me even a little you know what a crock that is because at no point in my life have I ever wanted anything else than to be a wifey and a momma).

Anyway, early February I got a call from a my friend up in Clarksville saying there was someone who needed a volunteer to lead his youth group girls at a 'Disciple Now' retreat up in Kentucky just over the Tn state line. I was NOT interested in hanging out with a bunch of 13 years old girls for a weekend in the back woods of Kentucky, (whats that movie where they 'squeal like a pig'?) But I obliged anyway.. I went up to visit my friend and get the info for the retreat from her friend. When I met the pastor, he introduced me to the guy that would be leading his youth group boys for the weekend... I was no longer dreading this. WHEW! What a hunk! ;) I actually thought he was dating a friend of my friend (not the case at all BTW). So the weekend drew nearer and I got anxious.. my bff Chels reminded me over and over to NOT think about him or anything that could happen. It was tough!! Finally Feb. 25 arrived and I packed up my desk early on that Friday to drive from Brentwood to Hopkinsville... Ugh. I made it there to this little tiny church literally in the middle of no where and started to walk to the door, it swung open and the these young teenage boys popped out with a big welcome followed by.. HIM.. (*YESSS* doing a private white girl happy dance inside) They all took me up to the room where we'd be meeting and we sat and chatted and bantered with the kiddos.. I could tell this was going to not only be a fun weekend but oh so very interesting! We were teaching them "The Five Love Languages for Teens"... So not only was I going to be spending an entire weekend with this hottie, I was going to be talking deeply about Love and relationships the whole time!! WORD TO YOUR MOTHER! :D

The details of the weekend are pretty blurry but the last night is as clear as day. We were having our last little get together out in an open field with a huge bonfire. I remember they started it with gasoline.. haha.. Eric had to hack at the ground with an axe to keep the massive fire from burning down the field around us... I wont lie, it was so incredibly hot to watch him with an axe.. to this day it totally turns me on when he cuts wood. haha As the pastor talked about each of us having one thing in our lives that was holding us back from falling totally in love with Christ and living life fully for others, I instantly knew what it was in my life. He asked each of us to write down on a piece of paper what it was and then, when we were ready to let it go, throw it into the fire and give it to God. I wrote down on my paper my idea of marriage and my constant need to look for the 'one'. The hottie was sitting next to me, quietly strumming his guitar *bonus points* and I just couldn't let go of this paper. With this man sitting next to me that I felt so strongly for, it was next to impossible, but as if sensing my hesitation he caught my gaze and winked to let me know it was ok. With confidence I got up and threw this folded paper into the flames. As I did, it caught fire and flew into the air, turned to ash, and rained back down in tiny glowing dust balls. WOW.. that was friggin' schweet! I knew it was just going to get cooler from there. After we sent the kids to their rooms to go to sleep the three of us (pastor, E and I) found our selves spending hours talking about life and love and expectations of our futures. It was scintillating and even though I can't recall a single word... (i was busy looking at this man in front of me) I knew it was going somewhere. We left that weekend with new friends and a lot of memories and *Buttercups* to take along with us. I got an email from E the following Monday.. and Tuesday he came down to my town to see me with our pastor friend. We ate dinner at my friends house and then watched a movie... I had both guys on either side of me and little did i know they were waiting to see which one of them I'd lean towards... hehe cute. Needless to say E and I ended up holding hands the entire movie. :)
Wednesday I drove up to Clarksville to see him and after church he took my friend Chelsie (who was there for moral support) and I on a drive to "talk".. he explained his feelings for me in detail, he talked about his life, a little of where he came from, and what his future held. Then he asked what I was thinking and how I felt about what he'd said... I think I stuttered a few times until Chels poked me or something and then I managed to stammer out something like... "Uhhh Yeah, I agree" haha, I was so blown away by his honesty and forwardness about his feelings and what he thought of a relationship and about his life. I think I could have married him right there! After the drive Chels and I started home and realized he had left his backpack in my trunk (I still had my Escort of Loooove then and I'm pretty sure that's why he fell in love with me) :) So we found our way to his little house and he came out to get the bag. He gave me a hug and as much as I tried to make it last.. he literally took me by the shoulders and pushed me back... little did i know this would be a trend in our dating relationship...
The following Saturday was our first official date :) We took a picnic of quesadilias and salsa to the Bicentennial Mall downtown and then we walked around just talking and enjoying the spring :) It was perfect! He drove back to Clarksville afterwards and then we realized we hadn't taken any pictures! SOOO He was considering driving back down to see me that night after he went to a movie with some friends but got delayed because of a fatal accident they witnessed. So being "worried" about him and his friends I drove up to see him :) We stayed up late talking and hanging out with his friends and then we sat in the car and talked! ~I've still never met another man that will talk to me as much as he does and enjoys it!~ We decided we were a couple as in boyfriend and girlfriend and then we talked about boundaries... and levels... and kissing... let me tell you this boy was a prude :oP He started out talking about how cool it would be that if we were meant to be married that we waited until our wedding day to kiss for the first time... all the while I'm nodding my and head thinking "ummm that's not going to work for me..." Soon after he said that we kissed for the first time :) it was almost 3 in the a.m. but it was perfect!! :)

From then on we were inseparable and the next month he said he loved me, in May he took me to Kansas to meet his family... I fell in love with them too :) And on June 11 he proposed.. I said yeah.. sure.. why not... ;) We got married on September 4th of 2005 and have continued to grow with each other through life lessons (like spending over a thousand dollars on 2 pots for example) and happy times and babies!

Almost five years ago I met the man of my dreams and since then he has continued to make my dreams come true. We've always said that we were not just soul mates but we are playmates, always able to laugh and have fun with each other! He spoils me in ways that I can't even describe and takes care of his family better than I could have ever hoped for. He is paving a future for us that will take us beyond even YOUR wildest dreams! I couldn't have asked for anyone better to share my life with.

I am still just a little girl that fell in love with a boy and we're playing house. :)

The night he Proposed

Silliness

Sweet Daddy E and baby C

C's first Bday!

Jazz on the Lawn!

Us reliving the proposal moment in the Gazebo @ Opryland where he popped the ??

Family pic of 09!

Deployment...

SNOW 2010

I'm on a social networking high...

2010-02-09T01:03:00.000-06:00

It's approx. 1 a.m. and I am wide awake.. well I shouldn't say that because If i crawled into be right now I'd be dead asleep. But I'd say that the pregnancy talking... My mind is going a million miles a minute, So I thought maybe a blog would help me clear some of the things going on under my ponytail and between my ears....

I was challenged by a business associate to contact a certain person, so I could look to her for advice and guidance when the men we take counsel from fail to explain things in the female language. It is a task I willingly and excitedly accept! I thought for sure she'd have a facebook, but I searched under several names to no avail. She must be good at hiding it if she does have one! My next step is to use our business resources and get her my info so hopefully she'll contact me.. and give me access to her facebook So I can get to know her, in my own facebook fetish ways :)

Anyway, while searching for her, a friend in need started chatting with me about a failing marriage. It makes me sad to see such things happening. She asked me at one point if i thought there was ever a reason to call it quits... I said no. Mostly because it sounded like the relationship she was talking about was looking for a way out, and this particular situation is so common and even more commonly fixed. They are young and its the hardest thing they've faced with each other and there is really no need to just give up. If they'd only be willing to put in the effort and work it takes, I know they could both be very happy with each other. Since we've been married we've known between 15 and 20 couples to divorce... wow in 4 and a half years... That to me is ridiculous and pathetic. Marriage is not about making someone feel good, its not about being happy, or even about 'doing the right thing". It's just simply NOT about you. You've committed yourself to this person, promised to love them no matter what. Everybody has faults, you can enhance them or you can get through them, either way those faults are what you take on when you marry someone... even if they don't surface until later. Anyway, that's my little soapbox...
I also started wondering through all of my social networking... Who reads my blog that I don't know about. Who is stalking me? I think my FB page is set to private but you just never know. Its funny to think, what if this person that I don't talk to anymore still keeps up with me. I know there are people I network myself to through others and enjoy keeping tabs on.. aka spying or FB stalking if you will. Its fun and a challenge to me, and of course I'm nosy as hell and love a good story to share. :) I was 'networking' tonight and found out an old friend I had deleted(for personal reasons, nothing against her) is pregnant... its just weird. She is part of one of the couples we know that divorced in the last couple years. I think I probably took it too personally, but I put a lot of counsel and a lot of emotion in the counsel i gave her and it hurt me when she blew it off for the counsel of divorced women and people who didn't know the whole story of what she was going through (and PUTTING herself through), as in both sides of the story. To me it is so sad when a person will spin a story or situation in order to hear what they want to hear instead of the truth. Anyway, she's moved on and remarried (weird) and is now pregnant (weirder). And I just wonder (probably because I spent so much emotion on her) if she thinks about me as she enters this new adventure of parent hood. (I know that's probably a selfish thing to think, and maybe even a little egotistical.) She was a part our lives as we went through the first pregnancy and she was someone we routinely entrusted Charlotte with. Is it strange of me to have hoped to have been an example at least in the momma arena of life? Even if she refused to listen to my relationship advice, I'd still like to know I could be someone she thinks of through her journey. I think about her all the time. It is really strange actually, because we have remained close with the other half of her failed marriage. Not because we took sides, just because it seemed to fit better that way. I don't know if there is divorce etiquette or anything (I'm sure there is now that its such an easy and oh-so-common choice for people now).

Hmmmm... I often wonder if she keeps tabs on me.. you know.. through "networking". I fully expect(hope) that other people do it too (so that I'm not the crazy one). haha

Anyway.. That's what has been rolling through my brain the last few hours... I've been too busy this weekend to be socially networked so this is like my 'fix' of social networking...
Do you ever get caught up in looking at other people's pages or even friends of friends pages? Like if someone makes an interesting comment on a friends page or status or whatever, I'm drawn to them and want to read their info page and see their pictures and who they are friends with... its like getting to know them without ever meeting them. Maybe I'm weird and crazy but its super super fun to me!!

And That's the way the cookie crumbles...
Stay Classy San Diego, I'm Ron Burgundy ;)

I know how you like your Quickies! ;)

2010-02-08T16:01:00.000-06:00

So in trying to keep up with blogging I'm just going to blog a little randomness today :)
We are heading to a new community group tonight... YAY! I miss my girls like CRAZY, but it seems that we are a little too busy for each other anyways, and kind of going in different directions. It always great to catch up with them but its a new year and time for a new group! The group we are hoping to fit in with is a group of some couples, some singles, with a couple of other preggo's in there as well :) We met them last night at a Super Bowl party, and seemed to be in the same stages of life. We are really excited about getting to know them and really finding where we can enrich their lives and where they can enrich ours (what we believe community is all about)! The only downfall is having to find a babysitter. We've been so spoiled with the last couple of groups we've been in because they've had a lot of kids and babysitters on site. I know some people are totally fine with hiring babysitters and all, and I'm sure I'll get used to it BUT its a tough transition. We've always left C with people she knows well and is comfortable with and typically who are adults. This time we are going to pick from the church list and it will be either a teen or college student.. Ahhhhhhh!!!!!! Its so weird to think about, but I'm sure I'll get used to it eventually. Eric said I was taking too long picking one because he knows I feel bad about leaving C with someone that's unfamiliar, so he said he would pick someone for me, haha. We'll see how it goes.

We went to the doc this morning... they will not give us another ultrasound... in fact the midwife we saw was quite rude about it. Eric asked under what circumstances they did second ultrasounds and she said only if something looked wrong or if they were unable to get a certain measurement. she left the room saying she was going to look at the ultrasound to see if there was anything wrong or any reason for a second one, she came back less than 2 minutes later with a big fat lie on her face saying she looked everything over and that there was no need for a second look. I wanted to punch her. I sincerely hope if we DO go to the hospital for the birthing process, she is NOT there. I WILL punch her then and explain that it was for lying to my face... BOOYAH!! But I'm going to check with the 4D place and see how much it costs to get just the gender testing done... ok just called and its 95 bones!! WOAH! We may just have to wing it and see in April! :oP I still think its a girl, but we'll see...

Ummm... what else is new... Charlotte is doing fabulously in with potty training! She's gone the last 2 days with dry diapers! :) YAY!! She hasn't even been running the house naked! We've been out and about and she's still held it in for the potty! SO EXCITING!! :)
My friend Patty came up last weekend to hang out! So fun! She's coming back in two weeks for the shower!! I'm super excited for it! I checked the registries today and there are a few things that people have gotten. I am kind of worried because EVERYTHING is online, even on our Target registry. It's just hard to pick stuff because we really need just certain things and those happen to just be online only items. I was really glad to see the diapers being bought, that's a load off my mind, and my wallet. ;)
I'm excited about this month! So much fun stuff! product showings, Valentines day, baby shower, and just LOTS of FUN!!! We are going to be asking for more support from our friends and family with our business too! Since we truly believe our products will enhance the lives of others, we want to share them with those close to us, and if anything gain their trust and support in our business venture. Don't be surprised if you hear from me soon!

That's about it! We are 30 weeks and 1 day! And our next Hypnobirthing class is this Wednesday! That will probably be the next Blog!

The Hypnobirthing Experience

2010-02-04T12:53:00.000-06:00

So, most of you know we attended our first of four sessions in a Hypnobirthing class. It's held at the West End Women's Clinic in Nashville. Let me explain how we came to decide on this method and how we found this particular class.
I've posted before about our decisions with this pregnancy and the upcoming birth of another sweet baby girl. Looking outside of the box is not an easy thing, especially when so many people don't understand and aren't willing to support us in this venture that we've chosen. In doing my research for alternative pain control and through some of the books I've read, there are several different methods. Whether its breathing methods or changing the way you look at birth or even herbal remedies, it all comes down to wanting something different than that which society has placed in your mind as 'normal' birthing. I looked at several different things but came to the conclusion that the mind/body connection is the strongest form of pain control. I can simply tell my body what to do. That sounds ridiculous to most, I'm sure, but really, how many times have you told yourself you're not tired or talked about food and suddenly, you are salivating for whatever was talked about. Ina May talks a lot about this in her "Guide to Childbirth" book. Researching this came up with a couple different things to look at. The program Orgasmic Birth as well as Hypnobirthing. I love the idea of both and think that they are actually very similar. Orgasmic Birth is about letting go of the idea and fear associated with birthing and allowing your body to enjoy the experience. If you think about it the same muscles and parts of the female body are used and engaged in birth as in love making and having an orgasm. With Hypnobirthing you put yourself into an alternate state of being and let your subconscious take over. Both require a willingness to let the body take its natural course, and be totally in compliance with what your body needs to do. When I was looking for these programs locally and their practicality, Hypnobirthing seemed to require more than just reading from a book or watching a video, which is something I think an Orgasmic birth could be achieved from. I looked for classes in our city.. nada.. so of course I looked in Nashville.. Lo and behold, the Vanderbilt Midwifery center offers a hypnobirthing program in their offices! SO, I emailed as soon as I found it but I was only like 13 weeks along. The instructor, Sandy, told me to check back after 22 weeks. I waited until the holidays were over and contacted her the first week of January, and there was a class that night; I figured the cost would be expected then, something we could not afford at the moment. I told her we wouldn't make it that month. Last week I emailed her again to get the schedule for Feb. and told her we'd be there! WORD! :) It stinks having to find a sitter and drive all the way to Nashville for about 2 hours of class then drive back late and get the wee one in bed, but it is oh so very worth it, I believe.
Ok, so, that's the background behind our attendance last night. We got to the clinic just in time for the class, walk in the room and there are just a few other couples there, the lights were dim and there was calming instrumental music playing lightly in the background. The room was more of a small lobby. An end table was set up with a Laptop and speakers, surrounded by chairs and a little couch (total waiting room furniture). We made a v-line for the couch and snuggled in comfy-cozy like. ;) Eric leaned over to me while I was filling out the paper work and said "I don't know why, but I really pictured us being on the floor on a gymnasium with chairs in a circle or something" haha.. So funny. But in all honesty, neither of us really knew what to expect from the class. We did the typical introduction stuff and were asked a few questions. Once we got down to business, I found that a lot of the beginning info shared were things I'd already known or come to conclude on my own. She seemed to be trying to make points that, in my mind, I'd have driven home even more so, but because of her position, I assume she can't express extreme views. She finally got into describing what the class is about... Yay!

The definition of Hypnosis given:
Hypnosis is a means of including a level of consciousness that is characterized by relaxation and suggestibility. The purpose of hypnosis is to provide a means of bypassing the critical mind and accessing the non- reasoning, suggestible subconscious.
The purpose of hypnotherapy is to assist the client, through guided imagery and visualization, to bring about a desired change in behavior or thought.

No type of hypnosis can be done without a willing person. So the people seen on tv or whatever are either rigged or volunteered and that's the only way it will work. One point she really wanted to make sure we understood was that we are never out of control. We 'hypnotize' ourselves and bring ourselves out of it. No one can make you do something while under hypnosis, that is against what you would normally do. Sandy talked about the power of spoken words and did a small exercise where she had us close our eyes, relax and then go to a kitchen we are comfortable in, someplace familiar and make a meal, and the slice a lemon and smell and taste it. It was cool because I could really smell the kitchen and the lemon. She made a point that everyone has been under hypnosis at one or more points in their lives. Have you ever been driving and realized you don't remember how you got from point A to point B,like you were just off in your mind somewhere and have no recollection of driving. You were in a heightened awareness in your subconscious state. That's what hypnosis is.
We also discussed changing our vocabulary to a more positive look. Here are some examples:
When you talk about contractions, you think of pain, so we replace that with Uterine Surge or just surges. This makes me think of surges of energy or power surges... I associate it with strength. Next is a Coach... When you talk about your partner as being a coach, you think someone yelling at you with a whistle telling you to work harder, go faster.. Not what you need to be thinking when you are trying to have a relaxing birth. Replace coach, with Birthing Companion, someone to encourage you and lift you up while your "running your marathon of birth". Labor was another word we talked about, it insinuates work, hardship, labor. (not what birthing is about) Replace this with birthing process. Birth is a process, its a natural occurrence for most women, our bodies just know what to do. One of my favorite quotes is:

Just as a woman's heart knows when to pump, her lung to inhales, and her hand to pull back from fire,so she knows when and how to give birth.- Virginia Di Orio

Another term discussed was 'due date', this word tends to put pressure on women to "preform" by a certain date, when in actuality i think less than 10% or women birth on their actual 'due date'. So instead we say Birthing Month. this takes the pressure off. I know for me C was 10 days late, I have a sneaking suspicion that miss Anabelle will be at least 5 days past her "due date' so in order to take the pressure off and to keep people from asking over and over "Whens that baby coming" or "Hurry up Baby Anabelle".... I promise.. at 10 months pregnant NO ONE wants to meet her more than I do!! :)
We talked about "water breaking" and how nothing is actually broken. Sometimes we have to have our membranes ruptured, but that involves someone going in with a hook and rupturing them for you (which is what happened to me). We replace this kind of talk with membrane release, because its really the membrane releasing the fluid around the baby, nothing broken, just released as naturally and beautifully and nature intended. When you think of 'pushing' you think of forcing and going against somethings will... This is not natural. We don't push, we 'breathe down'. Breathing the baby down implies letting the baby come in his/her own time, when you allow your baby to take their natural course without forcing them out, they will come much easier and with less damage to mom and baby, ie. shoulder displacia, tearing mom (or episiotomy)
So that was the gist of the class. It was all very interesting and I am really looking forward to next weeks class. We get out book and a couple of CD's to go along and will be given homework and such to complete!
Here's the Website for the class along with a lot of other things offered by Sandy. She created this company out of a passion for natural childbirth, and seeing women enjoy their birthing process as much as possible.

http://www.babyinc.org/index.html

Here are some more of my favorite birthing quotes.

The knowledge of how to give birth without outside intervention lies deep within each woman. Successful childbirth depends on an acceptance of the process. ~Suzanne Arms

When you change the way you view birth, the way you birth will change. -Mongan

If you don't know your options, you don't have any. ~Korte & Scaer
Mothers need to know that their care and their choices won't be compromised by birth politics.~Jennifer Rosenberg

Birth is not only about making babies. Birth is about making mothers ~ strong, competent, capable mothers who trust themselves and know their inner strength.~Barbara Katz Rothma

We have a secret in our culture, and it's not that birth is painful. It's that women are strong. ~Laura Stavoe Harm

My Little American Idol

2010-02-03T10:56:00.000-06:00

We LOVE Idol in my house.So Tuesday night when it was just about over Charlotte decided she wanted to sing too. :) It was precious!! I just had to share:

Think or me today.. and lend me your truck.. :)

2010-01-27T09:00:00.000-06:00

Today... I will be tackling Baby Anabelle's room... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Feel free to send sympathy cards, this room is a DISASTER!! But I found a really cute crib and dresser for her room that I will be picking up either today or tomorrow so I have to get the room ready! YAY! :) Can't wait to pick them up... but I need a Truck to get them.. so anyone with a truck and a heart.. I could really use your generosity right about now!! :) This preggo needs a ride! hehe
Think of me today as you are all enjoying your clean houses and nice relaxing rooms, haha

Here's a picture of what we're getting sorry they're not very good pictures, I'll take better ones when we get them here! :)

Dream Night

2010-01-26T08:45:00.000-06:00

Hubz and I took a little vacation out west this past weekend. Since the majority of my travels pretty much extend to Southwest Florida and back, this was the farthest I'd ever been, and especially the farthest west! The trip was interesting...
On our way out we flew through Denver.. SHEW! It was windy!! Most of that flight was spent bouncing up and down and poor E ended up with with marks on his arm by the end of it. I had a tight grip on him and kept asking (since he has been on many more flights then me, and on planes of less quality at that) "Is this supposed to happen?" "This is ok right?" "Are you sure this is normal?" :) Anyway, we landed in Denver with enough of a layover to grab lunch and hop onto another flight into Tucson. That flight was pretty bumpy too but I was used to it.. sort of... We watched Baby Mamma on that flight... HILARIOUS! If you haven't seen it come over and we'll watch it together, its one of my fav's!! The movie made the flight go by quickly and when we landed in Tucson, we grabbed our bags and headed to get out rental car. It was a sweet ride, sorry I forgot what it was, but I just LOVE the new/rental car smell! :) It was one of those that starts by just pushing a button.. it was cool.
Anyway, by the time we got in the car and heading to the hotel, it was getting close to 5 and we had to be at our conference at 7. So we rushed on over to the hotel (which was where the conference was held) and I tried to grab a quick nap before getting ready. It didn't work out very well, I couldn't get comfy enough to drift, I thought maybe i was just excited about the evening... but it turns out we had big issues with our bed... (I'll come back to that later). We were looking pretty SNAZ if I do say so myself :) E splurged and got me a cute outfit to wear *shoes and all!**

We got down to where the conference was and there were lots of people dressed in their best. We were literally among several million/billionaires, and were feeling quite inferior :) It was AWESOME! We met out fantastic 'upline' and they introduced us around. Our table was a bunch of other youngsters in the biz and it was fun chatting with them. During the dinner that was served our upline sponsors came over and asked if we wanted to meet the speakers.. Um.. YES! Meeting Ron and Georgia Lee Puryear and Glen and Joya Baker... WHEW!!! Umm that was huge! And then to hear that 'We've got what it takes to make it', from Ron Puryear!!!

Talk about lighting a fire in our bellies! If you do not know who this man is, google him and the Bakers too... they are amazing people with amazing stories! The point of the evening is to inspire and hear stories of how they got started and how they built their business. It was so amazing, we've listened to them on cd's before and are ALWAYS inspired but to hear them speak in person and see them up there was indescribable! Then to be called up to introduce ourselves as someone who is making a difference in this business was.. WOAH!.. just craziness! *Thanks Gary and Jenifer!* That was a big surprise.
By the end of the night I was soooo exhausted from all the excitement and travelling (not to mention it was past 11) I was about to drop. So we said our 'good bye's' and 'great to meet you's' and E took me to bed. I fell asleep almost instantly and E stayed up watching tv for a bit, I guess the excitement from the evening got him all fired up.. or it could have been the 2 coffee's he had on the plane, the energy drink he had right before the event started or the cup of coffee he had right after dinner... one of those could have done it... :oP
Shortly after 3 I woke up and realized it was dead silent... if you know us, you know that Charlotte sleeps with a sound machine in her room and we have a baby monitor in our room so we hear the sound machine all night too... I could not sleep at all! I tried to turn on my phone *which was NOT dead before i went to sleep* but it was completely dead and wouldn't turn on. So I got out my laptop and turned on the white noise i had in my iTunes, the only problem there is that every 6 minutes it stops for a couple seconds and restarts... UGH! I tossed and turned all night after that! The bed was ROCK solid.. not cool for anyone let alone a preggo with hip issues... The next morning E got up and left the room to let me sleep in for a while... it didn't happen. Man, I was soooo uncomfortable!! So I got up and text him to come back. We got ready and went out to grab some b.fast. We were on our way to IHop, when E spotted a Village Inn, he couldn't pass it up :) He LOVES that place! It was very YUM (not as yum as Ihop's stuffed french toast but whatev). Then we went to meet up with our upline sponsors. They have a beautiful ranch house with 10 horses roaming the property and a couple of pups running around. :) It was great to finally meet and get to know them personally and not just through business! I am so confident now with them behind us, guiding and encouraging us, that we'll be free in no time! Our goal is to be *Platinum* by July.. which means that our income from our business will match that of our military pay. This will allow us to continue to grow while E is gone for a few months and then pick back up when he returns and have a substantial **RESIDUAL** income but November 9, 2011.. our ETS date! Yay!
We went to lunch with Gary and Jenifer and had Mexican food that is still giving me heartburn :oP and then headed back to our hotel for a nap and to get ready for an evening on the town. We went to Cushing Street Restaurant and heard some awesome live Jazz and then to a coffee shop to chat more. I think we got the best conversation in at the coffee shop. The entire day was full of information and uplifting from them and we came home totally ready to get going! After another sleepless night in our horrible hotel (we vow to never stay at a Hilton again) We got up super early and headed to the airport for a day of travel home. We were SOOOOO ready to get home and see our little miss! She stayed with her Mimi for the weekend and apparently didn't miss us at all. :oP We had a loooong flight to Chicago then a good 2 hours layover there. We watched Walk the Line on the long flight and grabbed a great lunch @ Harry Carey's restaurant in the airport. Then hopped onto our last flight HOME! When my mom got there to pick us up C was snoozing in the back so we went back to Mimi's house and I snoozed with C for a little bit then we ate dinner and headed home.... Ahhhhh It feels good to be home.
Now I have to get moving on some business stuff! Don't be surprised if you get a call from us! ;)

27wks and 4 days Miss Anabell Ruth is still cookin!

2010-01-20T08:41:00.000-06:00

I haven't done a pregnancy update in quite a while, so I was thinking maybe I'll just go through and describe the new pregnancy and how its been different from the last one. Of course there are the obvious differences of having a toddler already, being in a new place, being close to home and surrounded by friends, having the experience of already doing this once before, and definitely having a larger knowledge base of all things pre-baby/labor and delivery/post baby. Not saying that I know it all but coming from knowing nothing, I'd say I know a little :) Some of the not so obvious differences are the major body changes from baby #1 to baby #2, different hormonal balance (or lack there of), better vitamins this time, more active lifestyle (you know toddlers keep you moving whether you want to or not), and along with more knowledge comes more choices than what doctors offer.
Details you say?? Ok let me delve a little deeper to explain myself ;)
Even though the obvious differences are, well, obvious, I'll touch a little on them first. Having my little monkey running around has made this pregnancy so much more fun! She's a constant reminder of whats to come and I can't wait to welcome a new sweet girl into the mix. I will have to change my vocabulary quite a bit though. The words "Favorite," and "My Girl" will have to me removed or substituted to include miss Anabelle :) I'm constantly telling Charlotte that she's my favorite baby girl and my buddy.. the list goes on. I'm sure she knows by now but I'm going to have to get creative with how I affirm her role in my life, a task I willingly and so excitedly accept!! We're working diligently on trying to include her in things as we get ready for another little angel baby. She's amazing, of course, and is excited to be a big sister (although she wont admit it if you ask her).
Being in a new place has been a small insignificant difference. Our house is actually smaller than our last apartment! Not to mention the amount of STUFF we've accumulated over the last 2 years, we're cramped but it has given us more reason to evaluate whats truly a necessity and what we can do with out (something I'm horrible at but getting better!). We have more freedom in our house to decorate and of course its nice to be in our own place with a yard and in a neighborhood and friendly community. We're so fortunate to be stationed here so close to my family and friends. We've made some new and wonderful friends here in 'Tuckasee' (as I recently heard our little town refered to) and they are so near and dear to our hearts. I can't wait to introduce them to the new little love of our lives. Once the little miss gets here, she will have no shortage of love constantly poured onto her from all aspects of life!
Right after Charlotte was born, mainly when I started breastfeeding her, I dove myself into researching a lot of different things, mostly breastfeeding because I needed a LOT of help. The forums and websites I was going to also had a lot of great information about solid food, baby food, birthing methods among other things. The birthing part is what caught my eye the most. A natural beautiful way of doing things without medical interventions, making it into a memorable wonderful experience instead of something to be feared and dreaded. I am reading a couple of books right now that are really REALLY fun! My favorite has been Ina May's Guide to Childbirth. If you don't know who Ina May Gaskin is, you should definitely google her. She's an amazing midwife and one of the most world renown for her efforts, not to mention her 'practice' The Farm Midwifery Center is right here in Tn! She's a hippie through and through and I LOVE it!! :)
Moving on to the not-so-obvious differences in first and second pregnancies for moi. When I was preggo with C I got round all over, i gained more weight in my hips thighs and rear than anywhere else and bear the stretchmarks there to prove it! :oP C was so far up into my rib cage I'm pretty sure my boobs rested on my belly, My waist was non-existent, and i wore maternity clothes the entire time. Miss Anabelle, however, has graciously stayed quite low this time and is allowing me a hint of a waist at least. My boobs have gotten bigger it seems this time which is weird but oh well, more room for all that yummy momma milk later! :) It has been amazing how much quicker everything has progressed this time around! My belly poked on out there making my pants tighter around 12-14 weeks! And I felt her dancing around in there at 14 weeks! With C I know it was well after 20 weeks. Maybe she was more mellow in the womb... oh lord, what does that mean?! This one could be even more crazy than C?!! AHHH!!!!
Its funny because I don't remember being so emotional in my first pregnancy. Eric says not to worry, that I was just as crazy then as I am now, haha. I can tell when I wake up in a bad mood, and most of the tie I have no reason to be but its hard to shake it... I chalk it up to hormones and a lack of balance in there. I drink an energy drink just about every morning because they carry B12 and a lot of other B vitamins that really help my overall mood for the day! And speaking of vitamins, instead of the nasty horse of a prenatal pill they usually prescribe, or even the Flintstones I had to take the first time around, I've been taking DoubleX.. a SUPER prenatal :) Its a series of 3 pills that are much easier to digest and not only have the recommended vitamins, they also come with phytonutrients, and a lot of other vitamins for overall health and energy levels. They really keep me going through out the day! I have been doing the Wii Fit lately and of course running after C keeps me on my feet :oP The first time around I really just kind of sat around in our apartment. We didn't really have very many friends and so I didn't do very much or hang out with people very often. Not at all like this time. We just love being right where we are!

The last unknown difference with this pregnancy and the the last, is our personal decisions pertaining to how we are choosing to labor with and deliver Miss Anabelle. I'm not going to go into details because it is our personal choice and we want to avoid the negativity that typically comes along with stepping outside the box and choosing alternative methods. We are however VERY excited (me more than Eric of course). Its fun to discover the alternatives and chose what we feel is best for us and our new little bean. I love researching new topics and then sharing and discussing them with Eric. I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm crazy sometimes but he always listens and lets me explain things before he voices his concerns or opinions, and we always come to a great compromise/decision! :)

All in all we are so excited to welcome a new little snuggle bug into our little family! She is going to add so much life and excitement, not to mention more chaos, to the mix! :) We love a good challenge!

I used to keep you updated with the "currently"section of my blog so I'll try to continue that from now on :)

Current craving- Peanut butter ANYTHING! I just can't eat enough of it! :)
Current Annoyance- getting where we want to be in our business! Its taxing :oP
Current task at hand- getting ready for our trip to Tucson this weekend!
Current Favorite- Seeing all the new babies that have recently popped out and all the Momma's-to-be!!
Current excitement- the Upcoming weekend business trip For E and I! So fun!
Next step- finish Laundry and get the house picked up so we can pack up and head out for the weekend!

Nudity: pro's and cons (a little silliness on a manic monday morning)

2010-01-18T09:26:00.001-06:00

Eric and I took a little road trip this weekend and as fun as it sounds.. at 27 weeks pregnant and with a 2 year old... it was a tough one. But we worked a little fun into the mix while we were in the car. We tend to be very silly when we're driving, be it listening to music and singing together or just talking about random things.
One of the topics we touched on was nudity. I made the statement "The world would be a better place if everyone walked around naked." Eric knowing full and well that men are not that attractive when naked, asked what I meant so I went deeper.
Here's my theory:
Because nudity is not all its cracked up to be in the magazines and movies, I think the world would be a better place if everyone walked around naked and it was completely acceptable for people to do so. I think that celebrities would not be famous if we saw them naked all the time, flaws and all. teens wouldn't jump into bed with each other because there'd be no mystery left to discover. People are just not that pretty naked unless you love them. For example, I love my husband I enjoy seeing him naked, it doesn't mean that I enjoy his chest hair, armpits and hairy legs, It means that I look past the flaws and embrace him as whole. I would not be so inclined to see my neighbor's hairiness and think its attractive... Eww, I'd vomit actually. I think that people would be less inclined to be so secretive about sex and their desires if every one was naked, all the time. Every one would be at their most vulnerable state, all the time, and it would be accepted. We'd be a transparent world. One where secrets were unleashed because you have nothing to lose and status meant nothing because everyone is just as naked, hairy and ugly as you. Now don't take that the wrong way, I think the human body is a beautiful and amazing thing in all forms, as long as it's REAL. I like reality and all that it brings with it, the nitty gritty if you will. Weather its scars from child birth or a hairy tush... its real and I like it.
Now on the flip side of this, there would be some complications accompanying this life style... for instance I personally don't like the idea of nakedly sitting where someone else's naked rear has been (what f they don't know how to properly wipe themselves, or have some sort of spreadable disease down there). So I think we'd have to all carry around a little pillow to sit on, or perhaps seats would all come with those disposable seat covers that come in public bathrooms. (I asked E what he though about that and he said, "I'd just wear pants") Also, the sun exposure, we'd all have to become much better sunscreen appliers.
Eric often comes home with stories of how he plays sports with his teammates and when they play shirts vs. skins it can get pretty gross, haha. This would be another problem with the nakedness. A scenario Eric presented was, playing basketball and jumping up to make a shot and hitting someone in the face with his.. cough cough.. you know. Football wouldn't be such a 'contact sport', actually contact sports in general would probably become less appealing, haha.

So there you have it, I really could go on and on about this topic, but I think for now that's it. There are pros and cons and its probably completely unrealistic. I just can't turn down the idea Utopian society one day :)

Back to the grind..

2010-01-12T11:08:00.000-06:00

I had a whole baby post written and saved in my drafts but decided to wait on posting it. A lot of people disagree with what it says, so to avoid stepping on toes and getting negative feedback I'll keep it tucked into my drafts for a later date :)
I usually drink an XS energy drink every morning because of the B12 vitamins I get from it. It gives me energy in a healthy way and the B vitamins make me a happy girl :) So we ran out early last week and are STILL waiting on our full order for this month, it should get here today since it was submitted on the 7th. Anyway, I'm attributing my lack of blogging to the lack of B12 in my system. :P When I went to the store yesterday, I picked up a couple of the 5 hour energy shots since they have the most B12 in them, and sipped a little bit of one this morning. With those I only drink a little at a time so I don't get the jitters. Plus I'd say they're not quite as healthy as the XS we distribute. So that along with a wonderful morning with my lovies I am feeling quite inspired today.

Here is a list of thing i could, should and would like to do:
first the should's (even though I probably wont get to them because they are not as fun) :)
Clean out the car
Clean out and semi organize the baby room
put away Christmas decorations (no i haven't done this yet! don't judge me!)
was and fold the rest of the laundry... ugh

Next the could's (I probably wont get to these either because as much as I'd like to I don't think I have the time or all the tools to finish if I started today)
Turning C's baby bedding into big girl bedding with a Tinkerbell twist :)
Finishing the Romans shades and curtains I started for the kitchen
go through and organize my craft area (we've drawn it out and are planning to build some shelves on the wall and make a screen so I have a small space to myself)
Think of and get started on a home made Valentines day present for E :)
Make a fun Valentine Apron (pretty and pink with ruffles and frills)

Now for the would like to's
make some more wine bottle lamps... maybe with a V-day feel, and I'm thinking of decoupaging pictures onto them
I have some Crocheting projects to finish up a few afghans and some slippers, I might try a hat and scarf for C, I started a headband for her but she stole my H hook so I have to either get another one OR search the house for the millionth time :oP

So that's a fun on-going list I have running in my head at all times. Its one of those things that I often think about and add to but will NEVER accomplish fully :oP Oh well. Hope you all have an amazingly craft-ily inspired day!!
Big Smiles.

Oh and P.s. Baby bean, Anabelle has had the hiccups a lot lately, its adorable!! :) I LOOOVE feeling her poke and prod in there... its very visible now too... I wish I could get a video of it but Its not that noticeable. <3

My Ode to Spring

2010-01-05T12:29:00.000-06:00

Woah.. two whole days in a row of blogs... I smell a trend.. ha! We'll see.

So, I am dying in the frozen tundra! I know I know, its Tennessee and in comparison it doesn't get THAT cold but its definitely too cold for me! I don't remember being this miserably cold last year. Its sooo dry! It would be one thing if there was snow, even like a few days of it. But there's just nothing but dry cold frigid air that cuts straight to the bone! Last week sometime I watched a yoga video that was done on the beach and I could literally feel myself there. Just thinking back to living in Fl and waking up to the warm moist salty breeze has put me in full beach mode. I wake up every morning disappointed that I'm not at the beach. I am a eager little beaver and ready to be warm!
I've been thinking and have decided I will settle for an early spring. How about some Buttercups and tulips? Maybe an Iris here or there?? The warm breeze with 50-60 degree days and 40-50 degree nights?? Sound fab. to me! So I'll post a few of my favorite Springtime things, in hopes it will encourage Mother Nature to cut us some slack on the frigidness!!!

#1 So First of all, I LOVE that last snow that seems to wash winter's ugliness away. Its usually at the middle to end of March and just after the snow melts Spring starts to "spring" up! :)

#2 I Love the Easter bunny :)

#3 I am such a nerd, but I absolutely love Birdwatching! I could sit and stare at them out on the feeders all day long!! I think I get it from my Grandaddy and Grandmommy, they did the same thing, but much more professional looking :) Spring brings their bright colors back and for some, it brings them back up here to visit my yard once more!

#4 Spring often symbolizes new beginnings, new growth, be it in yourself, in relationships, or from the earth. Its a time for planting seeds and watching them grow. They don't call it "Spring Fever" for nothin! ;) I Love spring flowers! These were ones I grew on the balcony of our first apartment in North Carolina. Gerbera Daisies, Daffodils (or as we call them in the south, Buttercups), and Gardenias. Buttercups have been my favorite flowers since I was a little girl! I used to go to my Grandparents house and pick them because they grew like crazy over there.

#5 I LOVE the beach in Spring! Its soooo nice right around February and March, Just perfect for laying on the beach. A nice bright sunny day out there with temperatures in the 70's and sometimes 80's but with a nice cool breeze, pure heaven!! And at night riding around in the car with heat on your feet but all the windows down just smelling all the Gardenias blooming and filling the air with sweet aromas... I can feel it now. I used to do that a lot when I lived there.

So there it is, Mother Nature. Do you think you could give me a small break?? Bring some warm breezes blowing my way?? Pop up a few of my pretty flowers? Well, until then, I'll just try to endure the bitter cold bite of winter. We're supposed to get a couple inches of snow this weekend so maybe we'll get out and play in it, red noses and all! ;)

The Ever-so Cliche' Resolutions post....

2010-01-04T09:20:00.000-06:00

Yes.. I'm going to fall into the crowd here and give you the run down on my 09' and what I'm looking forward to in... '010(??).... hmmm what do we call the teens of the millennium?

2009 brought a LOT of trials for our little family. We lost several people in our lives and some of them were very near and dear to our hearts. We endured a deployment of 7 months, and another 4 months of excruciating schedules. It wasn't until mid-November that we were able to even have a decent conversation and work on our marriage (as every marriage needs maintenance). A glorious new pregnancy, with a scary week or two at the beginning (we're still not sure if it was just a clot or if I was carrying twins and lost one). New business goals, and new mentorship in that area as well. Now, let me go into detail a bit.

January of 2009 brought a sad day with it. Eric left for the sand box on the 11th and left me (the not-so-sure-of-myself one that knows nothing of taking care of a household on my own) with our little girl with 2 large dogs and 2 kitty cats. It was insane at some points... like when one dogs started eating the house.. literally... and when the car broke down, or when the house appliances stopped working. Long days and even longer nights. BUT all of those things have made me a stronger, more independent individual and I am so thankful for the good friends and family I had to surround me at the time. I would NOT have made it through those months without each and every person in my life at the time. I eventually found my groove in life, I found a little piece of ME again and it was glorious! So through the bad situation, greatness, of course, triumphed. Hubby and I had great communication while he was away, talking almost every day and he was able to see his baby girl grow up through the video chatting and when he returned there was no hesitation for her.. she knew that he was HER Daddy! :)
I would actually say the 4 months following the deployment were worse than the actual deployment. Eric was brought home early because of the death of his step-father Ralph, a deeply cherished and under appreciated role in their family. We were denied the proper reunion and it took a toll on us. After spending 10 days in Arkansas with family grieving and taking care of the necessities, we came home to a tumultuous training schedule. Eric was thrown into schools where he was gone for sometimes 21 or the 24 hours in a day and other times days at a time. When he was home, he was unable to 'be home' meaning he was so ingrained in his work that he was unable to switch into the husband/daddy role for his ladies, or he was asleep. Somehow in late August we managed to get pregnant, and dealt with a possible miscarriage of a multiple. It was a trying time. After this particular school, he left for 2 weeks and by the time he came home we were both just exhausted. We attended a marriage retreat in November where we FINALLY connected and had long talks with out being parents (my mom kept the babe for the weekend). We hashed out a LOT of differences, and surfaced some buried feelings of bitterness and resentment, and a few hidden secrets. We replaced all the error of thinking with truth and learned some valuable lessons in dealing with each other and time constraints. Since then our marriage and home have been much happier places. Once again greatness triumphs.
Through out the year we faced not only the death of E's step-dad but several others that I've posted about previously. Altogether about 8 people we know passed away in 2009.. not to mention ALL the celebrities! To me 2009 was a year of tragic passings and learning through hard times, not enough highs to out weigh the lows and I'm here to say GOOD RIDDANCE 2009... I will NOT miss you!

Now, onto bigger, better, brighter and more joyous things... The things to come in 2010!! I of course will pledge to the ever so popular "resolutions" such as losing weight one Miss Anabelle arrives, staying healthy, becoming more organized, and overall being a happier and more content person. Blah, Blah, Blah... Exciting times are ahead for the Wehmeyer house hold. We are digging deep into our business and really building it. Eric took the 2 and a half weeks he had off for the holidays and spent about 15 hours a week either making calls, having meetings or just gaining general knowledge of his business. We've set our goals for the year and plan to have an income running parallel to our military paycheck by this time next year. Eric is including me in his goal setting by breaking up the goals and giving me rewards along the way. The first big one for me is setting up 3 meetings for him or having 7 attempted meetings resulting in a new phone for me! YAY!!! I've had the Blackberry Pearl for a little over a years and a half now... I've had to replace it THREE times! They are sending my 4th phone to me tomorrow. UGH! Anyway, I'm thinking the Droid Eris is going to be the Shizzzle ;) So don't be surprised if I call you to talk about products or something. ;) I have a few other goals along the way as well but I'll be sharing those as they get closer.
You probably all know we are having a baby girl in April and are planning on going as natural as possible. I'll spare the details unless you ask for them. I'm so very excited for Little Anabelle to be joining our family. She's the perfect little addition. We've been getting ready for her over the past week, moving things around and getting out Charlotte's newborn sized clothes. Once we get her room semi-organized I'll have pictures to share, as of now it looks like an F-5 tornado went through babies-r-us and spit it all back into our yellow guest room. But I am so proud of the progress we've made so far in de-cluttering the house for this little girl (and my sanity). A few projects we have around here are making our garage a little more organized because we'll probably be moving our products out there along with some business support material, creating a peaceful, inspiring, yet organized crafting space for me (notice I saw space... it will be small in this teeny little house he inhabit), and of course getting the baby room all set up.
I am in full belief that 2010 is the year of new beginnings... seriously, I know at LEAST 10 people including myself who are expecting this year, a few who are planning to conceive this year and a even more who just had babies and are in the first few months (some of the best times I think)!! Its going to be a fun baby-filled year!

So there you have it, my 2009 in a nutshell and my 2010 sneak peek.
And yes, another of my "resolutions" will be to blog more consistently... blah blah blah

Hope you enjoy!!
Happy 2010 may the new decade bring joy, peace and love into your lives!

Call Me a Slacker... I've been busy

2009-12-08T15:46:00.000-06:00

Man oh Man... I appologize for my lack of blogness. Its been a busy time! Any free time we've had we've tried to focus on our little family and its growth and development (or my sanity). Our little bean is growing and has now turned into our little Anabelle Ruth. Thats right folks, We are having a hamburger.. I mean a girl ;) And we couldn't be more excited! Although, we'd have been just as excited if it was a boy. We've recently been thinking of how to decorate the new room and the new nececities that we didn't know of when we had C. First on my list is a Baby Wrap. I asked for one like this for Christmas:

And I also just finished a registry @ http://www.diaperjunction.com/ here: http://www.diaperjunction.com/giftregistry_home.asp?action=view&id=6476 The password is Ruth. It was super fun to make! Lots of diaper fun! One thing we are trying is one-size dipes.. hopefully they'll last all the way through to potty training time. Oh gosh! I found the COOOOOLEST stroller too! Check it out! http://www.cottonbabies.com/product_info.php?cPath=109&products_id=2012 Seriously AWESOME! Too bad its lie $800... oh well I'll see it in my dreams. One thing I'm looking forward to stocking up on is Babylegs! Soooo cute! They're pretty easy to make too. I just can't wait to have this new little thing all swaddled up and snuggled in with us! I've been thinking of trying these out : http://www.thegoodmama.com/ but they need covers and i just dont want to cover them up. Maybe i just need to research a little more into them because they are SOOOOO cute!! OH! I think we've decided on colors for the room.. The walls are already and very light and pale yellow, like a butter color. So we're going to add in some dark brown like a chocolate color and then like a Lilac or Lavender color and maybe a pink in there too. I can't wait to find or make bedding to match! We're going to buy the furniture used bc I keep seeing set on cragslist for pretty cheap. When I was looking for things at Target i found my breast pump, which I thought was discontinued. I'm super excited about this because I've tried looking for replacement parts for it before with no luck, so now that they're selling it again I should be able to find the parts pretty easily. I'm so anxious for everything to be done... I feel like I'm "nesting" but its entirely too early for such things. Oh well, I'm just ready for the new baby girl to spoil!! :)

And on top of all that excitement, its Christmas time!!! We definitely love the holiday season. Along with decorating and giving gifts and the stress of it all, comes family! So far we've gotten into a routine of going to Eric's family for Thanksgiving and staying home for Christmas. I really like this set up because I like being able to be at home and have an intimate setting for our little family to open present in. Last year (and we're planning on the same thing again this year) We had my Dad and Brother up here on Christmas eve for a big dinner and presents, then on Christmas morning we go in and get the kiddo up for her presents from Santa and our gifts to each other. When we finish at home we travel down to Nashville and make the rounds, usually to Murfreesboro to see extended family in a large gathering then to Mt. Juliet for Christmas with my Mom. This year is going to be fun because it wont be so much around gifts, the economy has hit hard around here. I'm looking forward to really seeing family and not having to focus on the opening of gifts, it'll mostly be focused on the little ones. I'm pumped bc I got some great deals on fun stuff for them on Black Friday!! I'm actually in the middle of the floor, surrounded by presents right now! haha In the middle of wrapping all of them. Even though I scored some sweet deals on some presents I'm still working on making a bunch of them too. I'm working on some afghans and wine bottle oil lamps. The time is passing quickly so I really need to kick that stuff in gear so we can be sending stuff out soon!! While I was wrapping presents tonight, I came across one we got for Charlotte, I had planned on getting her a Tinkerbell blanket and we ordered this one online. I was measuring out the Tinkerbell paper around this boxed blanket when I notice a layout of the blanket on the top of the box... ITS A SNUGGIE! Yes, we got her a Tinkerbell SNUGGIE! hahaha I was so suprised that I hadn't noticed it when i ordered it! Anyway, that made me laugh. :) Now I really have to get back to wrapping and crochetting... but I promise to be a better blogger.. next blog to come: a few of my favorite blogs to read :) If you check out the colomn on the left you'll notice I've added quite a few blogs under the "My Favorite Blogs" section... they are fabulous! Most of them are crafty and pretty but they are full of character and a good laugh every now and then. :)
(as E would say) Peace, Love, and Chicken Grease!

Merry Christmas
From the Wehmeyers!

Lunch break blogging... aka Procrastination at its best

2009-10-19T14:29:00.000-05:00

Typically this is how I clean my house when it needs one of those deep, master, pull the furniture from the wall to get behind it, kind of cleanings....
First I make a list.. I look over every room and make a detailed list of what needs to happen in each room.. this list is usually a couple pages long. I will lose this list after doing one or two tasks from it. Then I get frustrated and give up on it all. The next day, I make yet another list because I wake up and think.. yep, Its gotta get done NO MATTER WHAT! So this list is less detailed and more matter of fact, and might include and extra task or two. In the process of making this list, I am usually on the computer, FB and whatnot. I usually make a status saying I'll be cleaning the day away or something to that effect. An hour or two AFTER I am finished making my list, i get my ipod ready and put the head phones on. (Hopefully at this time the kiddo is sleeping) I have a really hard time cleaning when anyone else is in the house. So I've got my music going and I'm slowly getting in the zone... Then I get one room done. Say the kitchen, Its spotless and beautifully clean. Looking around I feel accomplished, I've done the piles of dishes, gagging at the food stuck in the garbage disposal, as my husband is the worst about remembering to run it once he empties his left overs into it. I've cleared the counters cleaned under appliances and in them, I've done the floor and everything! As soo as I walk out of the clean room the pride fades into despair. This becomes my safe place. I am comfortable here and no longer feel the need to clean the rest of the house. so, then comes my break time, usually lunch :) And I waste time making something too elaborate and over the top. I sit and enjoy it and probably get online once more. The girl will get up soon so I try to enjoy some quiet and as soon as I do she walks in. :) So we eat together. I try to get her interested in something like a movie afterwards but to no such luck, she follows me through the house pulling down the toys as i put them away, the books as I organize them, the clothes as I fold them... So I give up, for the day and tell myself I'll start either when she goes to be that night or the next day at nap time.

At this point in the day, the girl is watching 101 Dalmatians, and steeling my lunch. I'm debating whether or not I should give up before I get frustrated or try to finish a little more before I have to get ready for my girls group. Perhaps an energy drink will kick me in gear before I have to leave :)
Today's Lunch!
Stats:
Current craving- Ice Water

Current Annoyance- dirt

Current task at hand- cleaning

Current Favorite- new clothes

Current excitement- Birthday this weekend

Baby Bean

2009-10-08T12:12:00.000-05:00

Little bean is growing like a weed it seems! The belly is poking right on out there and even though it has some squishy on top of it ;) its still neat to see the baby growing! We had the first real doctor appointment yesterday. They did the whole nine yards... from second base all the way on down. We heard the heart tones and little bean's heart rate was right in the middle at 150. They say you can tell if its a boy or girl by the heart rate, boys typically have a slower rate (130-140)and girls are faster(in the 160 range). Charlotte was always around 160 from the very beginning. So we'll see what this little bean is :oP I think I'm going to take the Walgreens pee test and wage the 85% odds... I just cannot wait to know!!!

In other news, Eric is done with his crazy scheduled training for the next week... :oP However, He's been sick this last week. We're not sure what he has but he's been tested for everything from leukemia to Mono and so far they are treating him for Lyme's Disease, an infection you get from tick bites. He was out in the woods for a few days over the last few weeks and they said maybe he got a bite then. Oh well he seems to be getting better. He also decided to go ahead and get his Army credits transferred into college credits and while he's deployed next year he should be able to finish his bachelors degree and start nursing school. That way when he gets out he has a job to go to and he can take a few months or so to get our business going to where he wont have to work anymore, even though he probably will just because he's just that way.

Charlotte is getting to be soooo funny! I mean, she's always been a little character but, her super girlie side is starting to show :) She gets so emotional about things, its hilarious! She loves to cook in her little kitchen, she makes us eggs, pie, soup, coffee, and tea. She plays with her toys and pretends they are talking, she'll do a high pitched tone to be them and then her regular voice when she talks to them, its sooo funny!

We've been really enjoying the weather lately, its been soooo nice!! :) We've been playing outside all week and have even had to turn on our heat a few times! We have gotten some much needed house maintenance done outside, and have decided to start preparing to sell our house. YAY! :) It will probably take us several months to get this accomplished, there are a lot of repairs and general changes we need to make in order to sell, but I'm soooo excited! We'll probably move on post for a while, so we can take our time finding the right place for us. And maybe if we decide to wait until we get out to buy another house we can move closer in to Nashville and he can work at Vanderbilt! I've been looking at the foreclosures around town and there are some great deals on the other side of Clarksville! YAY! I am very ready to get out of this side of town... ugh!

Some things we have coming up are, Eric's training next week, he'll be gone for 2 weeks. For my birthday I'm going camping with some friends! YAY!! Not sure where yet but I'm just excited to get away for my bday. Eric's deployment was pushed back to March for now but it's 7 and a half months, possibly 9 months. But it will be his last one!!! Woo!! We have 2 years, 1 month, and 1 day left until we are DONE with this mess! :oD

And the typical update:
Current craving- Pumpkin Spice Latte
Current Annoyance- Military
Current task at hand- getting ready to go to a wedding in Ms
Current Favorite- The Derveloy wedding!!
Current excitement- LIFE!!!

Fall is Falling into Place

2009-09-22T12:25:00.000-05:00

Today is the first day of fall! It is lovely! I don't really have anything interesting to share just some fun pictures!!

Some editing on this one:

The classic spot in Gatlinburg:

They weren't looking

Too Heavy!

Blowing kisses

Chillin' with the pumpkins :)

Lost

2009-09-21T13:45:00.000-05:00

Do you ever think of something to blog about when there's no possible way you could stop what you're doing and blog about it? Example, the car?? I do this ALLLL The Time! I think i would be a lot more interesting if i had time to stop, pull the car over and write out what I'm thinking about. Oh well I guess I'll stick to making up Facebook Status' in my head :)
Beth is going to have a cookie ;)
Beth is going to catch up on some tv shows and maybe take a nap
Beth is happy
Beth is tired of making up status' :oP

Here are my stats:

Current craving- Mac-n-Cheese!

Current Annoyance- missing old friends, wish I could just hang out with every one i know, all the time!

Current task at hand- Teaching little miss to go to sleep on her own :oP

Current Favorite- Fall!! And the new Yankee Candle Fragrance: Fall Festival mixed with Spiced Pumpkin... My house smells Delicious!

Current excitement- My mother in law coming to visit this weekend!

Check it!

2009-09-20T21:49:00.000-05:00

A Slideshow of the pictures from Gatlinburg! Sooooooo cute! :)

http://www.pictage.com/photographers/slideshows/viewslideshow?autoplay=1&slideshowid=2312&slideshowkey=wlxyzsjkclwnvjvp

Mountain Hiatus + New Tunes

2009-09-17T09:36:00.000-05:00

Charlotte, my mom, and I took a few days and went up to Pigeon Forge/ Gatlinburg for a few days this week. It was fabulous! We found one of the nicest hotels up there for just $55 a night! WORD! Our main reason for going was that my mom has a photographer friend who runs a wedding venue from his home. Here's his website: http://rikphotography.com/
We got in Monday around 4 and had time to kill so we went to check into our hotel. It was The Holiday Inn in Pigeon Forge, it was surprisingly beautiful! It had an amazing pool and hot tub area. We hadn't booked it yet so we walked to the desk and mentioned we'd seen a rate online for $55 and would they be competitive enough to match it or beat it. The poor girl was like, Ummmm, they run specials online a lot but I can't change the rate I have. So I asked if I could have the Internet code for the hotel and book our hotel online. She said ok so I sat down in the lobby pulled out my laptop and booked our night, had the confirmation sent to my cell and we checked right in! Our room was the standard 2 double bed room with a big ol TV and the usual stuff. We hung out for a while, got ready and headed out to find the place we were meeting the photographer. It was this cute little park behind the community center. He took a few shots there with C playing on the playground and playing with some flowers and walking on the walkway by a little creek. It was fun, I Love relaxing photo shoots. C just ran around playing and doing whatever she wanted (of course we prompted a few cute poses) ;)
After finishing up at the park, we headed to Rick's house. He warned us of his rambunctious little pups and sure enough one of them knocked Charlotte down right off the bat. She was a champ though. :oP We did a few different outfits on her and the pictures turned out GREAT!!! :) He loaded them onto a website where we just order whatever we want. He didn't charge us for the session and said he really enjoyed it. It was a great little place! If I was getting married, I'd totally go there! We definitely plan on going up again for some family pics including E-money! :)
The hungry little girl decided we should go eat so desperate to just find somewhere to eat we went to IHop :) It was perfect! C got ice cream for doing SUCH a good job with the pictures. She didn't fuss or cry at all!! Our next stop was the pool at our hotel! C was dying to get it! As soon as we had our suits on she jumped right into the water and swam like a fish! Saying 'Back water! Back!' While using her floaty covered arms to push the water back. It was her best attempt at real swimming! She did GREAT!! She played in both the pool and the hot tub and preferred the pool bc she could jump in and had more room to swim around :)
Tuesday we decided to go ahead and add another night to our stay and ventured out into Gatlinburg. We ended up at the Ripley's Aquarium. It was lots of fun, Charlotte LOOOOVED the SHARKS! She kept yelling SHARK anytime she saw one. Of course she relayed everything into Nemo terms, Jellyfish, nemo, dori, Gill, the 'My bubbles' fish. I got her some little play sharks in the gift shop :) When we left the aquarium, we just walked around a little, shopping and looking. We ate dinner and headed back towards the car. It was a little wetter outside so we just went back to the hotel. We were pretty exhausted by then. (we did stop at a few random places on the way back though, you can't pass up a junky beach store in the mountains, right??)
I think one of the most memorable and most important part of our trip was Mr. Rocky Rocky. Charlotte has this obsession with rocks and every time she sees a bed of rocks she has to pick one. She carried this one rock around everywhere we went and held tight to the thing. It was so funny because she would get so upset if she dropped it or if she couldn't find it, but we always found it and somehow we made it back with Mr. Rocky Rocky. haha

Last thing... I have to throw in the plug for my Bff Chelsie! She's working on some GREAT tunes! I'm listening to them right now! Head on over to her website http://www.chelsieguillemet.com/ She's got a blog going on there, her songs are on the left side, just pick one, press play and enjoy! My favorites right now are Randomly Beautiful and Favorite Color :) She also has lyrics up, and so if you are so inclined, go have a listen leave some love for her and let her know what you think! She's looking for some critics too! Let her know what you think!!

Word!
Here's the update-ness:
Current craving- Thin Mints dipped in Peanut butter
Current Annoyance- RAIN!
Current task at hand- getting ready to go to the Zoo tomorrow!
Current Favorite- Chelsie's new tunes! and also a Jim Brickman/ Lady Antebellum duet called Never Alone.
Current excitement- Tomorrow!! Going to the Zoo and Hubby gets home!! YAY!
And also the pictures! Here are some samples :)

Kitty Toes

2009-09-11T12:54:00.001-05:00

We're considering moving on-post. E is all for it i think but I am a little more hesitant. I don't like our house but I am comfortable here. I know how to take care of things here and If we moved I would miss my neighbors too much! Moving on post is a toss up. You never know what kind of house you'll get stuck in. We also don't know how long its going to take to get rid of this house and we'd have to wait until E's deployment next year to do it so we'd have the deployment $$ to still pay our mortgage until the thing sells. I'm also nervous about what kind of neighbors we'd get stuck next to, that's a big concern of mine. I want nice neighbors if i have to see them all the time. And another thing is that I wouldn't be able to have people over all the time, which is one of the biggest things that got me through the last deployment. All in all... we're still discussing it. So we'll see i guess.

Baby bean is doing wonderfully, bleeding has almost completely gone away. I've been taking it easy this week, to the max. Charlotte has been so good about it. She listens when i tell her to or not to do something (mostly) and since she's like me she's pretty laid back and go with the flow. :) She's getting so big and so understanding. There are of course time when she doesn't want to do what we say but for the most part she's pretty compliant. She's making up her own little games and playing independently more. She LOVES playing with her little kitchen. And the girl would sit and listen to anyone read for hours! She loves books! She has her favorites of course and can quote them almost all the way through. I don't think i could have imagined a family this great! Growing up and thinking about my future kids, I never in a million years knew it could be this wonderful! Anyway, enough mushy stuff!

I've missed interaction lately. When E was gone I saw my friends at least 3 times throughout the week and weekend, usually more. And not that I don't LOVE him being home but I do miss getting the time to hang out and go out with the girls or whatever it was. I used to have people over here all the time. And I don't think anyone has been to our house in over a month!! Ugh! So I'll be planning a get together asap! E leaves this weekend for a little bit of training and then comes home at the end of the week and I'm supposed to be going to Gatlinburg with my mom next week sometime (YAY!). I am really looking forward to getting out of the house! Although I wish it was the beach, I suppose the mountains will do. :)

Ok well here's the Current status:

Current craving- Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.. STILL can't get enough!

Current Annoyance- sleepiness

Current task at hand- finding a recipe for some kind of yummy dip for my chips

Current Favorite- The new Nicholas Sparks book (finished it last night!!)

Current excitement- eating my PB&J on the Elmo and Big Bird plate that C handed me :)

Next step- take a nap and then give the cat a bath

Caution: graphic descriptions

2009-09-07T09:41:00.000-05:00

Sunday was a roller coaster of life, it was the the twirly part where you are pretty sure your safety harness is going to break and you're going to die for sure. Yep, that was it.

Saturday night I got up several times though out the night to pee, and the last time was around 3:30. Charlotte woke up so I got up to check on her and went to the bathroom right before going into her room. I wasn't flushing bc the bathroom is in our bedroom, and I didn't want to wake up E (he hadn't slept in like 36 hours). Nothing felt different, but when E came in to wake us up Sunday morning, he said do we need to talk about the toilet? I'm thinking, "what, its just pee! and i didn't flush so YOU could sleep" He took me to the table and sat me down, then he pulled out this cup. It was red and there was something in there. It looked like a blob of goo. I immediately knew what it was. He said he found that in the toilet and he thought the same thing i did. I continued to bleed and spot through out the night, so we thought it was over and we'd lost out little bean. We went to my clinic bc i haven't found a midwife, or gone to the clinic on post yet, but they sent us to the ER. We got there at about 2:30 and got checked in and sat down and waited.. and waited.. and waited. Of course that was the day Charlotte decides to poop 4 TIMES! and I only brought ONE extra diaper... Ugh! So they called us back to a room finally and got me ready for a pelvic exam but it took FOREVER for them to come in and do anything. (meanwhile E had to run over to the PX to get more diapers!) They drew blood and then said I couldn't eat anything...BUMMER! E had gotten me a dark chocolate bar at the PX... Then they finally did the pelvic exam and said "Yep, things look a little open so it definitely came from there".. I'm thinking "WHERE ELSE WOULD IT HAVE COME FROM!!!!???" The Er doc seemed like a total fruit cake, he had no clue about anything regarding pregnancy or even GYN stuff.
They did the internal ultrasound and found a heartbeat.(whew!) She showed it to me on the screen and that was the biggest relief. We waited for forever for someone to come and give us an answer as to what was happening. They said they were waiting on the results form the ultrasound... I'm pretty sure the heartbeat was result enough for me... Anyway, The idiot Dr. said he'd put in a referral to OB for this week (lie), and he put me on 'pelvic rest' with out really explaining it to me. He really didn't seem to think this was a severe situation, at least not as severe as it felt to me. He told us the glob was just a clot, Although, to us, it looked like a sac with a cord. We left the ER at 8.. AHH!! yeah we were there from 2:30 to 8! Ridiculous. We stopped for food then went home and went to bed.

I took it easy on Labor day.. I guess that's the point of the day anyway.. Continuing to spot and bleed a little. We all went to some friends house last night for a BBQ and for some reason I didn't sit very much, so when we left my back was getting sore and right when we got to the car I got that 'oh crap' feeling. You know, the one where you start your period and you think 'oh crap' Well anyway, we got home and I had passed a small clot and had more bleeding that was red instead of the spotty brown color. We got up this morning and went to the Ob clinic and got in after waiting for an hour. The Dr, did another Ultrasound and said as of today it all looked good. Little bean measured right at 8 weeks and we could see the little heart just pumping away. The idea that I could have been carrying multiples and lost one of them was tossed in there and that makes me sad. I'd LOVE to have a couple of little crazies running around! After having the Tosi boys here, and missing them so much now. :oP But at least I have my little bean still growing and looking so strong. The Doc said to take it easy, and explained pelvic rest a little better.. basically.. nothing in there ;) (bummer) and no heavy lifting or jogging or long walks or anything strenuous. Just go about daily life without anything crazy. Sounds good to me! I have another appointment in a couple weeks where hopefully I'll be able to get some testing done for a couple of genetic disorders that we recently discovered in our family. And I'll be able to check out how they do things around here, regarding midwives and all that.
Tonight we're going to dinner to discuss what lies ahead in the next few weeks. E has training that will take him away for a couple of weeks and we have to decided if we need to put that off, with our current situation.
So here's my current Stats:

Current craving- Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.. can't get enough!

Current Annoyance- Army

Current task at hand- keeping little bean safe and sound in the belly

Current Favorite- CSI reruns

Current excitement- equally: seeing little bean heartbeat and hearing from a friend via myspace

Next step- fill my water bottle and do the hot dog dance with Mickey mouse and Charlotte Rose.

Here's the little bean

Currently

2009-08-31T15:00:00.001-05:00

Just a quick update:

Current craving- Chocolate Ice cream and peanut butter

Current Annoyance- Army

Current task at hand- get rid of pests living in my house and on my animals.. eww!

Current Favorite- Army Wives

Current excitement- a friends husband comes home today! Woo Hoo!

Next step- Shower and get ready for girls group!

My Birthday Girl!!!

2009-08-28T13:01:00.001-05:00

Its the Birthday!!! YAY! Happy Birthday Charlotte Rose! My sweet little two year old girl!! There is lots of fun to be had today! Dinner tonight with my Dad, and PARTY tomorrow with her cousin Haley, who has the same birthday but a year older. YAY for Mickey Mouse party!!