I know its been a while since my last post... sorry. We're busy with baby prepping and all of that business. I have a whole blog typed out in my drafts on breastfeeding but there's so much info, I don't know how to break it up and I keep getting distracted every time i sit down to finish it... we'll see maybe once I'm actually nursing again I'll have the desire to finish it. I'm sooo tired! We've done ALL this prepping; we know how to birth, we have everything ready for the most part and now... its the waiting game... UGH! Except it seems like there is SOO much going on! Every weekend is booked solid and on top of school Eric is working the business like crazy (a good thing, but frustrating). Baby girl is sitting so low I can barley sit down without being in total discomfort, and as soon as I stand up I feel like if I don't go straight to the bathroom I'll pee my pants in seconds :oP The sciatic pain has set in... so I don't get much sleep, and I can literally feel her resting on my hip bones sometimes, with her head on one hip and her punching the other hip. I'm just ready to have her out and in my arms :) We are making our finally birth decisions this week. Eric is too uncomfortable with doing a birth at home unassisted. I'm not going to force him into it, its not fair to him and puts me at more risk to be uneasy during the birthing process. So at this point our options stand as hiring a midwife and paying 3000 + for it... hiring a doula who'd be comfortable there without a midwife... a birthing center in Ky, that is basically the same as a hospital... or just heading to the hospital and taking our chances butting heads with everyone there. Its getting so complicated because I feel like everything is fighting against my desires and I should just give in and go straight to the hospital and lay there drugged letting them do whatever they want to me and my baby. The midwives I've contacted turned us down saying either they were unavailable to be a midwife or we are out of they're range of practice. Most of the midwives in Middle Tn are at LEAST an hour away from us, most of them much farther. I have one more name to contact, but judging by her website, I'm not sure I'd be comfortable with her. So we'll see, I'm just ready for all the decisions to be made and to get the show on the road. On top of making all of these decisions, we have a SUPER busy weekend coming up. We originally thought the events were spread out over the next 2 weekends but just found out that EVERYTHING is happening this weekend. So yay... Another busy exhausting weekend to recover from next week.
Lets see is there a brighter side to post about? I did recently get the most awesome phone in the world! :) Its a Droid Eris, It is made to rival the Iphone and in my book.. its way better! I LOOOOVE it! Oh and I had a prenatal massage last weekend! It was fantastic. We should have our tax return by Friday and will be able to buy the rest of the baby stuff and fix some things around the house with it as well as build up our savings quite a bit. That's all the positive things I can think of today... I guess I'm just having a Day, if you know what I mean. I could probably cry at the drop of a hat (thank you pregnancy hormones). Maybe its the weather.. it was sunny all last week and since last Friday its been cold, cloudy, and rainy... I got used to the endorphins from the sun... now I'm back into the winter blues.
Lets see is there a brighter side to post about? I did recently get the most awesome phone in the world! :) Its a Droid Eris, It is made to rival the Iphone and in my book.. its way better! I LOOOOVE it! Oh and I had a prenatal massage last weekend! It was fantastic. We should have our tax return by Friday and will be able to buy the rest of the baby stuff and fix some things around the house with it as well as build up our savings quite a bit. That's all the positive things I can think of today... I guess I'm just having a Day, if you know what I mean. I could probably cry at the drop of a hat (thank you pregnancy hormones). Maybe its the weather.. it was sunny all last week and since last Friday its been cold, cloudy, and rainy... I got used to the endorphins from the sun... now I'm back into the winter blues.
The sun'll come out tomorrow, tomorrow... Right?!
Here's some belly Love for you :)
Its a big one!!
1 comment:
#1. You are allowed to have days of whining at this point. It is okay.
#2. Your frustrations are legit. You have experience with a hospital birth and you saw what it was like... but at the same time, you are a different person now. More educated and more aware of your options. You can make it more of what you desire. Sure, it is not at home where you are most comfortable, but you guys, together, can make it more of the experience you are looking for. Maybe laboring at home the majority of the time then heading to the hospital for delivery, or maybe requesting to be alone in the room together except for infrequent checks and delivery. I am sure together you will come up with something that you can both agree to and be comfortable with.
#3. The sun's energy is much needed here too. I feel so much better and happier when it is sunny. I feel like that boost right about now is what you need.
#4. This time in 6 weeks or less, you will be holding that precious litte girl in your arms with that other precious little girl sitting right by you too. If that isn't enough to raise your spirits, I am not sure what is :)
Post a Comment