Thursday morning around 4 am, I woke up (for the hundredth time) to a contraction and tried to turn over to my other side. I immediately felt a sharp pain in my lower abdomen, beneath my humongous belly, almost like pulling a groin muscle. I thought I died. I could hardly go back to sleep but the pain eventually susided and I started my day just as I had the previous days of that week and the week before: overdue and frustrated at the lack of sleep due to inconsistent contractions, or surges as we like to say. My mom came in town to visit for lunch that day and we had some YUMO Mexican food (thank you El Toro!), and then I took Charlotte to meet Eric at the hospital for our, what had become routine, "post-date" appointments. These appointments consist of a non-stress test twice a week and a visit with a provider once a week. Since our last "post-date" appointment with our midwife, we had declined to schedule an induction date and so we had to be referred to an Obstetrician. This is because we had become a liability to the hospital if something "goes wrong." So, Thursday was our appointment with Dr. Farr. We'd met him before, at the beginning of my pregnancy when I had some scary bleeding and clotting. He was nice enough. He came into the room assuming I was like all other patients and said "Ok, Lets check your cervix, and see what we're looking at." I calmly and simply asked if it was a necessary procedure, and he replied with a puzzled "No". I told him I'd rather not know what my cervix is dilated to because it isn't any real indicator. He said fine and asked me to lie back for the AFI (amniotic fluid index) test. Since this is also a very routine "post-date" test I have no problem with it. It actually reassured me that we were doing the right thing. Dr. Farr's nurse started to ask when she should schedule our next appointment and NST, to which he replied "Oh no they can't have another appointment, we need to schedule an induction and get this baby out." Eric quickly stepped in and said, "No Sir, we're not planning on inducing." All through this conversation the Dr is looking over the ultrasound measuring the fluid around little Anabelle. The results came out great (again) and with my NST from that day being so great, at this point there was still no reason for scheduling any induction. Dr. Farr did not agree. He informed us that there "isn't a doctor in the country that would condone letting a woman go past 42 weeks" and "it is against his better judgment" and "if it was his baby, he'd already had an induction scheduled".. and my favorite "you'll have to sign a waiver, releasing the hospital and myself", to which we obliged, of course. We walked to his office next door and sat down like we were being interviewed. The man was nice and respected our wishes, all the while looking down upon us in the most nonchalant way possible. He thought he knew best and was determined that we felt the same... we didn't. He typed up his form and we signed it and left.
I took Charlotte home for naps and Eric went out to do a few business meetings. I had a few surges (contractions) during the nap, making it difficult to sleep, but I woke up to the surges getting stronger and stronger, and more uncomfortable. I woke up at 6 when Eric got home and I think that was when I started to think.. this might be "it." We thought about grilling burgers for dinner but as the time went by, really just 30 or 40 minutes, Eric decided cooking would not be the best idea right now and that he wanted to be able to focus and be there for me if I needed him. We finally picked a place to get food from around 8 or so. Ruby Tuesdays is right up the street and their New Orleans seafood dish sounded sooooo good (it later turned into a HORRIBLE mistake, which I'll explain a little farther down). We called our friends Darin and Russ to come play with Charlotte for a little while until my mom could get here, and also called our Doula to let her know we had started the birthing process and that we were ready for her to be with us. Rhonda (doula) came in about 45 or so minutes and my mom got here shortly after that. We had a full house for about 5 minutes, but Darin and Russ left when my mom got here and Charlotte was in the bedtime process so my mom took over that arena and stayed busy with her. Soon enough it was just me, Eric and the doula in a quiet house. With each surge that came I would close my eyes and focus inward, isolating myself from what was going on made it easier to breathe through the surges. We found an application on my phone that times contractions (can we say *HANDY*!!) and used that to keep track of them. Before dinner they were anywhere from 30 to 50 seconds long and 10 to 15 minutes apart. By the time the doula got there they were getting to be 5 minutes apart on average and about a minute or so in length. The most comfortable position I found to help me focus and not tense up, was to sit Indian style either leaning back against something to keep my head relaxed or leaning forward with my head drooped forward. The reason for keeping my head relaxed is to keep my neck and shoulders relaxed which in turn, for me, keeps the rest of my body relaxed. The surges are mush easier to breath through when all the muscles are relaxed and free of tension. When tension enters the pictures the body starts to panic and sends stress signals to the brain. Staying relaxed and calm, focusing on the truth of the situation makes the body do the opposite and can even release pain relief signals. When I say the truth of the situation I mean the fact that the birthing process is completely natural and my body was made to do exactly what it was doing. Resting in the fact that I was ready to go through that and knowing what was to come made things so much easier. I spent some time on the couch breathing through and timing each surge. One thing I found so comforting was my doula softly encouraging me and mentioning when she could see tension creeping into my forehead or shoulders. It was like she was this voice in my head just a calm, inspiring relief. I eventually moved from the couch to the bed to try and get some rest for what was to come. I wanted to labor at home as long as possible but the thought of it being too late to make it there started to creep into my thoughts. I got up a few times and went to the bathroom. Believe it or not, going through the surges while on the toilet was easier than in the bed or sitting on the couch. I don't know if it was because my pelvic bone was opened more or what but I stayed there for about 10 minutes one time. When I got up that last time it was right after a really strong surge and I stood too soon after it, I'm not sure it was completely gone but it made me nauseous and as soon as I got next to the bed, I started heaving. All of that yummy New Orleans Seafood came right back up.. it was naaaaaaasty. And the worst part of it was I threw up all over one of my favorite throw pillows for our bed!! It was a big square pillow that was green and flowery... so sad. It smelled awful and ugh.. it was just gross all the way around. I feel bad for whoever had to deal with it. Our doula came in a little later and gave me a massage and helped through a few more surges. One of the things I had read about was women vomiting when the baby starts to transition, meaning start to move from the uterus into the birth canal. So with this thought and the fact that my surges were now 2 to 3minutes apart and about a minute and a half to 2 minutes long i really felt like I was far enough along to go to the hospital. Eric started packing up the car, and letting my mom know what was going on. The Doula got her things together and we got in the car. The drive on post wasn't as bad as i thought it was going to be and we made it there in just a few minutes. I got into a wheel chair because at this point sitting was the easiest way to relax and stay focused through the surges that were coming over and over, some of them with no time in between. I was kind of getting nervous because I wasn't sure how our requests were going to be perceived and if we'd even be able to do most of the things we wanted.
This next part is what Eric likes to brag about :) It makes me feel good too, haha.
When we got up to the front desk at the Labor/delivery center, the clerk looked at us with a disapproving eye and in a doubtful tone asked, "And what are you here for?" Eric told her that I was in labor and that i was at the point that my contractions were 2-3 minutes apart and lasting almost 2 minutes in length. She didn't believe him!! Because I wasn't screaming and tensing and yelling, she thought we were lying. She called back to the triage area and said "I've got a couple here that says she's in labor and her contractions are 2-3 minutes apart" and then in a more hushed voice she added, "She's not showing any signs of labor or contractions, so i don't know if she really is." But they came to the door anyway and took us back to the triage for an initial check in. They hooked us up to the monitors (for the second time that day) and said they would send someone in to do the IV line. Eric quickly stepped in and said "we'd like to decline that" and the midwife reluctantly said, "Well I don't have a problem with that but i think the OB on call might, so we'll just leave them out of the loop. I'll bring by a form for you to sign in a minute." We were blown away at how easy that was! And then after they took the little sheet of paper from the monitors and walked out, i took the monitors off. They did NOT feel good on top of my confined belly. Eventually they moved us into a room.. it was, of course, fabulously HUGE and gorgeous. Nice hardwood floors, a rocking chair, a pull out couch (not chair! a couch!!), flat screen TV with DVD/VHS player, and most medical equipment was hidden from sight. We requested to be monitored intermittently and they were fine with that, they only came in every hour or so to check the baby's heart rate and make sure we didn't need anything. We signed a few papers declining pain medication and other things they like to offer. Other than a nurse coming in to check the heart rate, we were left alone, and it was wonderfully peaceful there. The lights were off except for maybe one and Eric sprayed the room down with a Lavender room spray, then also sprayed a dose of the Lavender linen spray on the bed. We brought our own big comfy pillow, which was another thing that kept me relaxed. Just having something familiar in an unfamiliar place makes your body calmer. I was able to stay relaxed the whole time and even in between the surges I would fall asleep sitting up. It was this level of consciousness that kept me here but in my own world where nothing else existed other than myself and what i was experiencing. I "labored" this way for a few hours, with the surges coming every minute or less and lasting well over 3 or 4 minutes each, eventually they just started rolling on top of each other and not giving me any breaks for what felt like 10 minutes or so. (it probably wasn't that long but in the moment it felt like forever!) I'm not sure what Eric and the doula were doing. Every once in a while, when they could tell I was struggling to stay focused, one of them would lightly rub my back or lay a hand where I was needing to relax, like in my shoulders. There were a few times Rhonda, the doula, would run her thumb over my forehead... oddly enough it was heavenly. I LOVED having the support of my husband and the Doula, someone who'd taken the time to get to know us and build that special trust level with us. From the aspect of femininity, it was empowering. It was like I could feel her empowering me in subtle but meaningful ways.
Around 4 a.m. we decided to try to sleep some. So Eric and I laid down in the bed and the Doula got comfy on the couch. I have to admit, at this point, I got so annoyed because Eric, my support fell asleep almost immediately, and although laying down made the time in-between surges easier, it was definitely the most uncomfortable way to "labor." It was in this time that I found a really strange way (but the best i could come up with) to get through the surges as they had become the most intense they'd been so far. You will probably laugh your tails off at this but what helped me make it through each one was the phrase "Ride the wave". :) It was something the Doula said maybe once or twice during a surge and it almost immediately stuck to my brain. When a surge would reach its peak in intensity, the only thing that would help get me through it was to picture a little man on a surf board, surfing on what looked like the steady heart beat on paper, like a print out from the heart rate monitors. It was like a paper drawing in my head and I would hear this song going along with the little surfer man. Any of you moms might know this, but there's a show on Disney called Chuggington and the song for it has a line in it "Riding the Rails" and that's what played in my head except it was "Riding the wave" haha. Also the song from Winnie the Pooh, where he does his exercises in front of the mirror and sings "Up, Down, Touch the ground" played in my head. I have no idea where that came from. I think maybe at one point as I was focusing on the "waves" on the paper in my head, I was telling myself, Up and Down, Up and Down, haha. Anyway, That's what helped me the most.
It started to get light outside, and I'm guessing it was around 6:30 or so when they came in to check me and we all kind of woke up then. I will say that shortly before waking up, as we're laying in the bed, poor Eric got the "wake up wood"... I almost cut it off... haha. Instead I just scooted away so that it wasn't poking me in the butt anymore. :oP Ugh... MEN. haha. I didn't tell him about that until much later though.
Anyway, when they came in to monitor the baby we were introduced to the new midwife on call for the day. It turned out to be our FAVORITE midwife!! We were SO excited that Mrs. Hamby was going to be with us as we brought our baby girl into the world. She was the last midwife we'd been seeing in the clinic and had been the most supportive/informative/encouraging provider we'd seen through out the entire pregnancy! So YAY!! Soon after they were done monitoring, I went back to my focused composure as much as I could. Things were getting tough and in every surge I was thinking, "As soon as I can open my mouth and get words out, I'm going to ask for drugs or something.. maybe even a Csec!" I was quickly giving into the pain and I think everyone could tell. I literally couldn't open my eyes or my mouth for more than a few seconds to ask for water. It broke my concentration too much and it was hard to get refocused once it broke. After a couple of hours, (which sounds like a long time but in my state of concentration it kind of floated by, time was irrelevant), I was done, I broke and told Eric and Rhonda that I needed something, ANYTHING, and that I couldn't do it anymore. I was exhausted, and nothing was helping me get focused again. They were everything I needed them to be in that moment. They assured me that I had already done it, things were almost over and I had come so far. Eric went through the relaxation script and helped me get back into 'the zone,' I had to ask him to start over again, but I eventually got there. The doula suggested we get into the shower and she went to go get it started and warmed up. It was probably 20 or 30 minutes before I was able to get up because of the surges being one on top of the other. Once I got into that shower though.. OMG.. that was THE BEST way to labor. I might as well have had an epidural, the shower was just as good! I still had the rolling surges but I could hardly even feel them. My focus went from trying to make it through each surge, to focusing on the warmth of the water and where it was pouring on my back or my belly. I was naked, sitting on a bench and Eric had the handheld shower head. He wrapped a towel around the head to make it less abrasive and more like a waterfall. It was pure heaven in that moment. We stayed in there for about 30 or 45 minutes and then the midwife came in to tell us that she needed to get me on a monitor for just a little while and she was also going to check my cervix for dilation. Up to this point, my water had not broken and I had only seen the mucus plug about 4 hours earlier. So we made our way back to the bed and I decided to forgo clothes at this point because I was planning on getting right back into that heaven of a shower as soon as they were done. I was telling them I needed this to be over soon. They put the monitor on my belly and of course the heart rate was right on track and they asked me to lie back so they could check my cervix. It was so unbelievably uncomfortable and even though she was quick I was almost in tears at that point. But she came back up with a glorious idea!! She said I was fully dilated and she could break my water for me IF i wanted her to. Now, this was something Eric and I had talked about ahead of time and had agreed that it was something we did NOT want to have done. When I had Charlotte, they broke my water when I was around 6 or 7 cm and then I had to labor like that for a long time even with an epidural it was miserable and unnecessary. I could feel Eric stepping in to say that we needed to talk about it, but all i could think was how soon would it all be over if she did it. So I tried to talk over him to the midwife, asking if and how breaking my water would speed up this process. The midwife assured me that i would be ready to push immediately after.... BOY WAS SHE RIGHT. I felt the release and then an amazing urge to push. I don't think I've felt anything more instinctual than that moment. We turned to the side of the bed where the midwife was waiting about a foot or two away from the bed and sitting on a stool low to the ground. She explained the position she wanted Eric and I to be in; he sat on the bed behind me, holding me under the armpits. I was basically dangling off the side of the bed with my feet braced against the midwife's feet. (You'll see in the pictures) Still naked.. in case you were wondering... haha. And then when the midwife was ready (and since i was MORE than ready) I began to push.. The quiet demeanor I had held for the previous 14 hours was gone and I was pushing with all I had in me. It was loud... I started out high pitched because that's just what came out but the midwife instructed me that I needed to go lower and breathe in a growling manor... so I growled... and Eric laughed.. and once again.. I could have cut 'it' off... But he was also crying so I guess I'll let him keep his manhood for now :oP Let me tell you... pushing a baby out.. hurts... I thought my vag was on fire and I could have swore that it was never going to end!! But the midwife told me her head was out and I could stop pushing and just breathe in short breaths, like panting almost, and then, at 10:04 a.m. on Friday April 30th, 2010, (just a couple of minutes after breaking my water), her body came and she was amazing. It felt amazing, I could focus on her and hold her and love on her right then and there. They let us hold her before wanting to do anything to her. The women in the room congratulated us and uplifted me. They said they'd never seen a birth like this before and that it was so beautiful. I couldn't help but agree. The cord was clamped once it was done pulsing and the placenta was delivered a short time later. This sweet baby was in my arms and was just perfect. She nursed within the first 30 minutes and was a champ! She and I both knew exactly what to do. I wasn't groggy at all from drugs, I had a renewed energy, where I had been exhausted just an hour ago. I honestly can't imagine anything more amazing than just being alert and able to care for my baby right from the moment she was born. With Charlotte I honestly can't remember anything after she came out, I was so exhausted and worn out, I just wanted to sleep. I don’t think I slept that day until maybe 4 or 5 in the evening, and even then it was for short periods of time. I was so ready to share everything.
We stayed in the Mother/baby unit until Sunday. We wanted to check out earlier, but were told the baby would not be released until 36 hours. Since that 36 hour mark fell on Saturday night after 6 pm they made us wait until the next morning. No biggie, we had a wonderful nursing staff checking in on us and yummy food that we got to pick out and order from the kitchen. One nurse in particular was so helpful and informative, it surprised us! He (yes, HE) just really liked his job.
Since then life has been glorious! I have had an easy recovery, if you could even call it that. There wasn't anything to really recover from.. After C I had ugly nasty bruising all over "down stairs" and I could barely walk, I needed help in the shower for the first few days, I had a lot of weight to lose, and I had 2 small stitches that itched like nobodies business!!! But this time around, no bruising, a little swelling but that’s it and it was gone before we left the hospital. Since my abs had separated completely during my pregnancy, I've had some lower back issues but obviously that had nothing to do with the birth and is being resolved with light ab exercises everyday. Anabelle is already past her birth weight and is a champion in the nursing department! She is such a great baby. She sleeps at night in usually 4-5 hour stretches and during the day she nurses every 3 hours or so. She is awake more than most babies I've noticed, but when she is awake she is pretty chill, just kind of hangs back and watches her crazy sister run around like a wild woman! ;) She's already in her pretty diapers, I thought it would be at least a month or so before she'd fit into them but we actually had to make them bigger to fit her! Anyway, She is officially 2 weeks old today and is just an amazing girl! :)
Here are some pictures from our adventure:
I took Charlotte home for naps and Eric went out to do a few business meetings. I had a few surges (contractions) during the nap, making it difficult to sleep, but I woke up to the surges getting stronger and stronger, and more uncomfortable. I woke up at 6 when Eric got home and I think that was when I started to think.. this might be "it." We thought about grilling burgers for dinner but as the time went by, really just 30 or 40 minutes, Eric decided cooking would not be the best idea right now and that he wanted to be able to focus and be there for me if I needed him. We finally picked a place to get food from around 8 or so. Ruby Tuesdays is right up the street and their New Orleans seafood dish sounded sooooo good (it later turned into a HORRIBLE mistake, which I'll explain a little farther down). We called our friends Darin and Russ to come play with Charlotte for a little while until my mom could get here, and also called our Doula to let her know we had started the birthing process and that we were ready for her to be with us. Rhonda (doula) came in about 45 or so minutes and my mom got here shortly after that. We had a full house for about 5 minutes, but Darin and Russ left when my mom got here and Charlotte was in the bedtime process so my mom took over that arena and stayed busy with her. Soon enough it was just me, Eric and the doula in a quiet house. With each surge that came I would close my eyes and focus inward, isolating myself from what was going on made it easier to breathe through the surges. We found an application on my phone that times contractions (can we say *HANDY*!!) and used that to keep track of them. Before dinner they were anywhere from 30 to 50 seconds long and 10 to 15 minutes apart. By the time the doula got there they were getting to be 5 minutes apart on average and about a minute or so in length. The most comfortable position I found to help me focus and not tense up, was to sit Indian style either leaning back against something to keep my head relaxed or leaning forward with my head drooped forward. The reason for keeping my head relaxed is to keep my neck and shoulders relaxed which in turn, for me, keeps the rest of my body relaxed. The surges are mush easier to breath through when all the muscles are relaxed and free of tension. When tension enters the pictures the body starts to panic and sends stress signals to the brain. Staying relaxed and calm, focusing on the truth of the situation makes the body do the opposite and can even release pain relief signals. When I say the truth of the situation I mean the fact that the birthing process is completely natural and my body was made to do exactly what it was doing. Resting in the fact that I was ready to go through that and knowing what was to come made things so much easier. I spent some time on the couch breathing through and timing each surge. One thing I found so comforting was my doula softly encouraging me and mentioning when she could see tension creeping into my forehead or shoulders. It was like she was this voice in my head just a calm, inspiring relief. I eventually moved from the couch to the bed to try and get some rest for what was to come. I wanted to labor at home as long as possible but the thought of it being too late to make it there started to creep into my thoughts. I got up a few times and went to the bathroom. Believe it or not, going through the surges while on the toilet was easier than in the bed or sitting on the couch. I don't know if it was because my pelvic bone was opened more or what but I stayed there for about 10 minutes one time. When I got up that last time it was right after a really strong surge and I stood too soon after it, I'm not sure it was completely gone but it made me nauseous and as soon as I got next to the bed, I started heaving. All of that yummy New Orleans Seafood came right back up.. it was naaaaaaasty. And the worst part of it was I threw up all over one of my favorite throw pillows for our bed!! It was a big square pillow that was green and flowery... so sad. It smelled awful and ugh.. it was just gross all the way around. I feel bad for whoever had to deal with it. Our doula came in a little later and gave me a massage and helped through a few more surges. One of the things I had read about was women vomiting when the baby starts to transition, meaning start to move from the uterus into the birth canal. So with this thought and the fact that my surges were now 2 to 3minutes apart and about a minute and a half to 2 minutes long i really felt like I was far enough along to go to the hospital. Eric started packing up the car, and letting my mom know what was going on. The Doula got her things together and we got in the car. The drive on post wasn't as bad as i thought it was going to be and we made it there in just a few minutes. I got into a wheel chair because at this point sitting was the easiest way to relax and stay focused through the surges that were coming over and over, some of them with no time in between. I was kind of getting nervous because I wasn't sure how our requests were going to be perceived and if we'd even be able to do most of the things we wanted.
This next part is what Eric likes to brag about :) It makes me feel good too, haha.
When we got up to the front desk at the Labor/delivery center, the clerk looked at us with a disapproving eye and in a doubtful tone asked, "And what are you here for?" Eric told her that I was in labor and that i was at the point that my contractions were 2-3 minutes apart and lasting almost 2 minutes in length. She didn't believe him!! Because I wasn't screaming and tensing and yelling, she thought we were lying. She called back to the triage area and said "I've got a couple here that says she's in labor and her contractions are 2-3 minutes apart" and then in a more hushed voice she added, "She's not showing any signs of labor or contractions, so i don't know if she really is." But they came to the door anyway and took us back to the triage for an initial check in. They hooked us up to the monitors (for the second time that day) and said they would send someone in to do the IV line. Eric quickly stepped in and said "we'd like to decline that" and the midwife reluctantly said, "Well I don't have a problem with that but i think the OB on call might, so we'll just leave them out of the loop. I'll bring by a form for you to sign in a minute." We were blown away at how easy that was! And then after they took the little sheet of paper from the monitors and walked out, i took the monitors off. They did NOT feel good on top of my confined belly. Eventually they moved us into a room.. it was, of course, fabulously HUGE and gorgeous. Nice hardwood floors, a rocking chair, a pull out couch (not chair! a couch!!), flat screen TV with DVD/VHS player, and most medical equipment was hidden from sight. We requested to be monitored intermittently and they were fine with that, they only came in every hour or so to check the baby's heart rate and make sure we didn't need anything. We signed a few papers declining pain medication and other things they like to offer. Other than a nurse coming in to check the heart rate, we were left alone, and it was wonderfully peaceful there. The lights were off except for maybe one and Eric sprayed the room down with a Lavender room spray, then also sprayed a dose of the Lavender linen spray on the bed. We brought our own big comfy pillow, which was another thing that kept me relaxed. Just having something familiar in an unfamiliar place makes your body calmer. I was able to stay relaxed the whole time and even in between the surges I would fall asleep sitting up. It was this level of consciousness that kept me here but in my own world where nothing else existed other than myself and what i was experiencing. I "labored" this way for a few hours, with the surges coming every minute or less and lasting well over 3 or 4 minutes each, eventually they just started rolling on top of each other and not giving me any breaks for what felt like 10 minutes or so. (it probably wasn't that long but in the moment it felt like forever!) I'm not sure what Eric and the doula were doing. Every once in a while, when they could tell I was struggling to stay focused, one of them would lightly rub my back or lay a hand where I was needing to relax, like in my shoulders. There were a few times Rhonda, the doula, would run her thumb over my forehead... oddly enough it was heavenly. I LOVED having the support of my husband and the Doula, someone who'd taken the time to get to know us and build that special trust level with us. From the aspect of femininity, it was empowering. It was like I could feel her empowering me in subtle but meaningful ways.
Around 4 a.m. we decided to try to sleep some. So Eric and I laid down in the bed and the Doula got comfy on the couch. I have to admit, at this point, I got so annoyed because Eric, my support fell asleep almost immediately, and although laying down made the time in-between surges easier, it was definitely the most uncomfortable way to "labor." It was in this time that I found a really strange way (but the best i could come up with) to get through the surges as they had become the most intense they'd been so far. You will probably laugh your tails off at this but what helped me make it through each one was the phrase "Ride the wave". :) It was something the Doula said maybe once or twice during a surge and it almost immediately stuck to my brain. When a surge would reach its peak in intensity, the only thing that would help get me through it was to picture a little man on a surf board, surfing on what looked like the steady heart beat on paper, like a print out from the heart rate monitors. It was like a paper drawing in my head and I would hear this song going along with the little surfer man. Any of you moms might know this, but there's a show on Disney called Chuggington and the song for it has a line in it "Riding the Rails" and that's what played in my head except it was "Riding the wave" haha. Also the song from Winnie the Pooh, where he does his exercises in front of the mirror and sings "Up, Down, Touch the ground" played in my head. I have no idea where that came from. I think maybe at one point as I was focusing on the "waves" on the paper in my head, I was telling myself, Up and Down, Up and Down, haha. Anyway, That's what helped me the most.
It started to get light outside, and I'm guessing it was around 6:30 or so when they came in to check me and we all kind of woke up then. I will say that shortly before waking up, as we're laying in the bed, poor Eric got the "wake up wood"... I almost cut it off... haha. Instead I just scooted away so that it wasn't poking me in the butt anymore. :oP Ugh... MEN. haha. I didn't tell him about that until much later though.
Anyway, when they came in to monitor the baby we were introduced to the new midwife on call for the day. It turned out to be our FAVORITE midwife!! We were SO excited that Mrs. Hamby was going to be with us as we brought our baby girl into the world. She was the last midwife we'd been seeing in the clinic and had been the most supportive/informative/encouraging provider we'd seen through out the entire pregnancy! So YAY!! Soon after they were done monitoring, I went back to my focused composure as much as I could. Things were getting tough and in every surge I was thinking, "As soon as I can open my mouth and get words out, I'm going to ask for drugs or something.. maybe even a Csec!" I was quickly giving into the pain and I think everyone could tell. I literally couldn't open my eyes or my mouth for more than a few seconds to ask for water. It broke my concentration too much and it was hard to get refocused once it broke. After a couple of hours, (which sounds like a long time but in my state of concentration it kind of floated by, time was irrelevant), I was done, I broke and told Eric and Rhonda that I needed something, ANYTHING, and that I couldn't do it anymore. I was exhausted, and nothing was helping me get focused again. They were everything I needed them to be in that moment. They assured me that I had already done it, things were almost over and I had come so far. Eric went through the relaxation script and helped me get back into 'the zone,' I had to ask him to start over again, but I eventually got there. The doula suggested we get into the shower and she went to go get it started and warmed up. It was probably 20 or 30 minutes before I was able to get up because of the surges being one on top of the other. Once I got into that shower though.. OMG.. that was THE BEST way to labor. I might as well have had an epidural, the shower was just as good! I still had the rolling surges but I could hardly even feel them. My focus went from trying to make it through each surge, to focusing on the warmth of the water and where it was pouring on my back or my belly. I was naked, sitting on a bench and Eric had the handheld shower head. He wrapped a towel around the head to make it less abrasive and more like a waterfall. It was pure heaven in that moment. We stayed in there for about 30 or 45 minutes and then the midwife came in to tell us that she needed to get me on a monitor for just a little while and she was also going to check my cervix for dilation. Up to this point, my water had not broken and I had only seen the mucus plug about 4 hours earlier. So we made our way back to the bed and I decided to forgo clothes at this point because I was planning on getting right back into that heaven of a shower as soon as they were done. I was telling them I needed this to be over soon. They put the monitor on my belly and of course the heart rate was right on track and they asked me to lie back so they could check my cervix. It was so unbelievably uncomfortable and even though she was quick I was almost in tears at that point. But she came back up with a glorious idea!! She said I was fully dilated and she could break my water for me IF i wanted her to. Now, this was something Eric and I had talked about ahead of time and had agreed that it was something we did NOT want to have done. When I had Charlotte, they broke my water when I was around 6 or 7 cm and then I had to labor like that for a long time even with an epidural it was miserable and unnecessary. I could feel Eric stepping in to say that we needed to talk about it, but all i could think was how soon would it all be over if she did it. So I tried to talk over him to the midwife, asking if and how breaking my water would speed up this process. The midwife assured me that i would be ready to push immediately after.... BOY WAS SHE RIGHT. I felt the release and then an amazing urge to push. I don't think I've felt anything more instinctual than that moment. We turned to the side of the bed where the midwife was waiting about a foot or two away from the bed and sitting on a stool low to the ground. She explained the position she wanted Eric and I to be in; he sat on the bed behind me, holding me under the armpits. I was basically dangling off the side of the bed with my feet braced against the midwife's feet. (You'll see in the pictures) Still naked.. in case you were wondering... haha. And then when the midwife was ready (and since i was MORE than ready) I began to push.. The quiet demeanor I had held for the previous 14 hours was gone and I was pushing with all I had in me. It was loud... I started out high pitched because that's just what came out but the midwife instructed me that I needed to go lower and breathe in a growling manor... so I growled... and Eric laughed.. and once again.. I could have cut 'it' off... But he was also crying so I guess I'll let him keep his manhood for now :oP Let me tell you... pushing a baby out.. hurts... I thought my vag was on fire and I could have swore that it was never going to end!! But the midwife told me her head was out and I could stop pushing and just breathe in short breaths, like panting almost, and then, at 10:04 a.m. on Friday April 30th, 2010, (just a couple of minutes after breaking my water), her body came and she was amazing. It felt amazing, I could focus on her and hold her and love on her right then and there. They let us hold her before wanting to do anything to her. The women in the room congratulated us and uplifted me. They said they'd never seen a birth like this before and that it was so beautiful. I couldn't help but agree. The cord was clamped once it was done pulsing and the placenta was delivered a short time later. This sweet baby was in my arms and was just perfect. She nursed within the first 30 minutes and was a champ! She and I both knew exactly what to do. I wasn't groggy at all from drugs, I had a renewed energy, where I had been exhausted just an hour ago. I honestly can't imagine anything more amazing than just being alert and able to care for my baby right from the moment she was born. With Charlotte I honestly can't remember anything after she came out, I was so exhausted and worn out, I just wanted to sleep. I don’t think I slept that day until maybe 4 or 5 in the evening, and even then it was for short periods of time. I was so ready to share everything.
We stayed in the Mother/baby unit until Sunday. We wanted to check out earlier, but were told the baby would not be released until 36 hours. Since that 36 hour mark fell on Saturday night after 6 pm they made us wait until the next morning. No biggie, we had a wonderful nursing staff checking in on us and yummy food that we got to pick out and order from the kitchen. One nurse in particular was so helpful and informative, it surprised us! He (yes, HE) just really liked his job.
Since then life has been glorious! I have had an easy recovery, if you could even call it that. There wasn't anything to really recover from.. After C I had ugly nasty bruising all over "down stairs" and I could barely walk, I needed help in the shower for the first few days, I had a lot of weight to lose, and I had 2 small stitches that itched like nobodies business!!! But this time around, no bruising, a little swelling but that’s it and it was gone before we left the hospital. Since my abs had separated completely during my pregnancy, I've had some lower back issues but obviously that had nothing to do with the birth and is being resolved with light ab exercises everyday. Anabelle is already past her birth weight and is a champion in the nursing department! She is such a great baby. She sleeps at night in usually 4-5 hour stretches and during the day she nurses every 3 hours or so. She is awake more than most babies I've noticed, but when she is awake she is pretty chill, just kind of hangs back and watches her crazy sister run around like a wild woman! ;) She's already in her pretty diapers, I thought it would be at least a month or so before she'd fit into them but we actually had to make them bigger to fit her! Anyway, She is officially 2 weeks old today and is just an amazing girl! :)
Here are some pictures from our adventure:
Doula Massage :) Ahhhh
Being monitored
Well hello there baby girl! Hope you like my editing :)
She made it!!
Hello baby girl!
Ahhh fini
hidden nip ;)
hope you like my bra :)
Loving our girl!
Stats
First Family Photo!
Meeting Mrs. Hamby
Getting pretty, Daddy fixed her hair that day...
LOVED that nurse!
Nursing like a champ!!
She's a serious PRO
Meeting Mimi, Uncle Jim, and Big Sister Charlotte! :)
Hope you enjoyed this! :)
7 comments:
Beth, dear...you are amazing...I loved hearing your story. I had exactly the same birthing experience with my bundle of joy, Miss Karrington and remarkably, the same experience with my first child, Christopher, as you did with Miss Charlotte! I'm so glad to have gone the natural route this time around, being alert and able to nurse so quickly and being happy and able to remember EVERYTHING was truely a blessing! The best birth experience ever, and I know i'll continue with my next child. It's rare to find mom's our age doing it the way it was meant to be done and I'm so proud of you my dear! Thank you again for sharing your story...it was surely a treat and oh so beautiful!!!
thanks for sharing!!!
This is beautiful Beth! So glad you had the experience you were hoping for. She is amazing!
So proud of you, Beth! Sounds like an awesome experience for you guys. So glad it went the way you wanted it to. I enjoyed reading all about it.
great birth story congrats that u went thru w it!
It was amazing to read that!!! You are so brave and should be proud of yourself for standing up (and getting) what you want. That is sooo cool. Congratulations on your sweet new baby, she is beautiful. Now we need a family reunion so I can hold her. :)
Thank you for sharing your story. I have heard horrible things about giving birth at a military hospital, and you changed my view immediatly. I am so afraid that they won't respect any of my wishes and push me into things I didn't want. You have given me hope that I can have the birth that I want here! Thanks again:)
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